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      "parent_permlink": "star-light-star-bright-i-wish-i-may-i-wish-i-might",
      "author": "steemitboard",
      "permlink": "steemitboard-notify-twodeadparents-20190727t025650000z",
      "title": "",
      "body": "Congratulations @twodeadparents! You received a personal award!\n\n<table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@twodeadparents/birthday3.png</td><td>Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 3 years!</td></tr></table>\n\n<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@twodeadparents) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=twodeadparents)_</sub>\n\n\n###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes!",
      "json_metadata": "{\"image\":[\"https://steemitboard.com/img/notify.png\"]}"
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      "author": "dtubix",
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      "body": "Cool! I follow you. <p><img src=\"https://preview.ibb.co/cTykQc/up3.jpg\" width=\"200\"/></p>",
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      "author": "kassie-vegas",
      "permlink": "re-twodeadparents-hello-all-20170807t141242123z",
      "title": "",
      "body": "nice introuction. Followed. **Follow me back** 😘",
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      "permlink": "re-donkeypong-screwing-the-world-s-poor-for-usd16-billion-steem-and-sd-can-cut-the-cost-of-money-transfers-and-take-down-the-predatory-20160801t151926203z",
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      "body": "personally i am not putting my money in steem at this time.  All cryptocurrencies are new and vulnerable and seem prone to hacks and attacks.  Steem is no different and i do not see it as a replacement for @bitcoin.  If so...then @steemit is my everyday play money and not my primary money for savings, bills, etc.  If you promote yourself as a social media platfrom stick with social media not as a cryptocurrency exhange platform between your friends.  The more you meddle and attempt to alter/add purpose and components the more likely you are to encounter attacks.   @steemit stay true to what you are.",
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      "parent_permlink": "orphan",
      "author": "twodeadparents",
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      "title": "Hello All!",
      "body": "@@ -1,8 +1,43 @@\n+http://i68.tinypic.com/rh2vbt.png%0A%0A\n Welcome \n",
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      "body": "Now that's the spirit!",
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      "body": "Absolutely!  Life is comparatively short in the grand scheme of things--no matter how long it is in years.  Might as well live each day to the fullest.",
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      "permlink": "re-twodeadparents-star-light-star-bright-i-wish-i-may-i-wish-i-might-20160727t042541960z",
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      "body": "Every life is worth living..a short one, a long one, a poor one, a rich one, a lonely one or a stressful one..only you have the honor of living yours! Live it as it comes :)",
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      "permlink": "star-light-star-bright-i-wish-i-may-i-wish-i-might",
      "title": "Star Light, Star Bright...I Wish I May, I Wish I Might",
      "body": "http://i66.tinypic.com/2qi6azk.jpg\n\nIt would be nice to have an aunt or uncle, a cousin, perhaps even a grandparent to speak to, but no, at 33 I am the oldest living person in my bloodline.  Considering the age my parents died (42 and 55), my future longevity does not look too bright.  My brother is a workaholic and I fear that I will be the last surviving member of my family within the next 5 years.  Yet, then again—my brother has the same fear but in reverse.  Neither of us take the best of care of ourselves but there is not much we care to do about the situation except promise one another we will ‘work on it’.  It is what it is and I am now firmly in the camp that it does not really matter how healthy I am—death will come when death comes. \n \nI imagine death to be very much so like the fictitious Death character in the Monty Python Meaning of Life movie.  There is a scene where Death stumbles upon a group of individuals at a house dinner party.  He tries to claim their lives only to be rebuffed and asked by the group of people ‘how’ they died.  Death responds that it was the salmon soufflé.  After some quick embarrassment over not cooking the meal correctly, the group accepts Death’s answer and begin to follow him to their afterlife destination.  Death, quite content with himself, is seen skipping along, merry as can be, with the group of newly deceased in tow behind him.  A short ways away from the house one of the deceased says “wait a second, but I didn’t eat the fish” but it did not matter--he too is dead.  The scene attempts to show that you do not always need a reason for death to occur. Fish or no fish—Death came to collect the entire group when he wanted.\n \nDespite the irony and comical musings of Monty Python no one ever knows when your number is up.  Morbid as it seems, I cannot escape the thoughts that I might only live for another 9 to 22 years if I am lucky.  I wish I may live to be older than my mother was when she died at 42 (9 years from now), and I hope I might live longer than my father was able to who died at age 55 (22 years from now).  The simple truth of the matter is that all I can do is live for today as if Death will be at my door the very next morning telling me I ate bad salmon the night before.  I may live to see 42.   I may live to see 55 or perhaps even 62.  However, it is also possible that I do not live to see my 35th birthday as no one knows what the future holds.\n \nThinking of my own mortality is a scary concept and one I am not too comfortable with.  I think often about whether I am happy at my job, in my life, with my friends.  At 33, and with such a potentially short lifespan ahead, do I want to invest time in finding a husband, settling down and building a family? Do I want to continue to build a career and strengthen my friendships?  What is the point if my life could be cut short in 20 years? Would it be fair of me to do this to a husband? Children? Colleagues? Friends?  Of all of these scenarios the one that grips me most is the fear that if I were to have a child(ren) that I could leave them in a situation similar to mine—alone without any parents or family to reach out to.  I know this is the grief and fear talking that makes me doubt everything.   I find I invest time and energy to fret over the what if’s and could be’s.  I am sure I am not the only orphaned adult to experience these thoughts and concerns.  It does not matter if your parent died of cancer or if they were suddenly taken away from you—it is a type of fear we ‘orphans’ live with—what if they set the bar and we do not exceed that age?\n \nThese fears are simply that--fears.  The future is unknown for everyone and I cannot allow myself to be crippled from experiencing life because of some unknown expiration date.  I know that when I do go I want what everyone else wants: I want to be happy with the life I have lived, happy with what I do for a living, happy with my family and happy with my situation. I want no regrets—or as little regrets as possible.  While my parents died young, and I ponder the longevity of my own life, I can only do one thing.  Pull up my bootstraps, tackle the day ahead and have faith that tomorrow will come. \n \nStar light, Star bright,\nThe first star I see tonight;\nI wish I may, I wish I might,\nHave the wish I wish tonight.",
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      "body": "http://i66.tinypic.com/2qi6azk.jpg\n\nIt would be nice to have an aunt or uncle, a cousin, perhaps even a grandparent to speak to, but no, at 33 I am the oldest living person in my bloodline.  Considering the age my parents died (42 and 55), my future longevity does not look too bright.  My brother is a workaholic and I fear that I will be the last surviving member of my family within the next 5 years.  Yet, then again—my brother has the same fear but in reverse.  Neither of us take the best of care of ourselves but there is not much we care to do about the situation except promise one another we will ‘work on it’.  It is what it is and I am now firmly in the camp that it does not really matter how healthy I am—death will come when death comes. \n \nI imagine death to be very much so like the fictitious Death character in the Monty Python Meaning of Life movie.  There is a scene where Death stumbles upon a group of individuals at a house dinner party.  He tries to claim their lives only to be rebuffed and asked by the group of people ‘how’ they died.  Death responds that it was the salmon soufflé.  After some quick embarrassment over not cooking the meal correctly, the group accepts Death’s answer and begin to follow him to their afterlife destination.  Death, quite content with himself, is seen skipping along, merry as can be, with the group of newly deceased in tow behind him.  A short ways away from the house one of the deceased says “wait a second, but I didn’t eat the fish” but it did not matter--he too is dead.  The scene attempts to show that you do not always need a reason for death to occur. Fish or no fish—Death came to collect the entire group when he wanted.\n \nDespite the irony and comical musings of Monty Python no one ever knows when your number is up.  Morbid as it seems, I cannot escape the thoughts that I might only live for another 9 to 22 years if I am lucky.  I wish I may live to be older than my mother was when she died at 42 (9 years from now), and I hope I might live longer than my father was able to who died at age 55 (22 years from now).  The simple truth of the matter is that all I can do is live for today as if Death will be at my door the very next morning telling me I ate bad salmon the night before.  I may live to see 42.   I may live to see 55 or perhaps even 62.  However, it is also possible that I do not live to see my 35th birthday as no one knows what the future holds.\n \nThinking of my own mortality is a scary concept and one I am not too comfortable with.  I think often about whether I am happy at my job, in my life, with my friends.  At 33, and with such a potentially short lifespan ahead, do I want to invest time in finding a husband, settling down and building a family? Do I want to continue to build a career and strengthen my friendships?  What is the point if my life could be cut short in 20 years? Would it be fair of me to do this to a husband? Children? Colleagues? Friends?  Of all of these scenarios the one that grips me most is the fear that if I were to have a child(ren) that I could leave them in a situation similar to mine—alone without any parents or family to reach out to.  I know this is the grief and fear talking that makes me doubt everything.   I find I invest time and energy to fret over the what if’s and could be’s.  I am sure I am not the only orphaned adult to experience these thoughts and concerns.  It does not matter if your parent died of cancer or if they were suddenly taken away from you—it is a type of fear we ‘orphans’ live with—what if they set the bar and we do not exceed that age?\n \nThese fears are simply that--fears.  The future is unknown for everyone and I cannot allow myself to be crippled from experiencing life because of some unknown expiration date.  I know that when I do go I want what everyone else wants: I want to be happy with the life I have lived, happy with what I do for a living, happy with my family and happy with my situation. I want no regrets—or as little regrets as possible.  While my parents died young, and I ponder the longevity of my own life, I can only do one thing.  Pull up my bootstraps, tackle the day ahead and have faith that tomorrow will come. \n \nStar light, Star bright,\nThe first star I see tonight;\nI wish I may, I wish I might,\nHave the wish I wish tonight.",
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      "body": "Hello and thank you for the comment. I am very new to this website (like 30 minutes new).  So i'm still getting an understanding on how the website works.  Will definitely take a look at your comment.  Thanks.",
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      "body": "http://i68.tinypic.com/axg22p.png\n\nEveryone will lose one or both of their parents at some point in their life.  In modern society, most can expect that they will not have the experience until they are in their 50s and 60s due to the advances of medical care.  Between the ages of 18 and 40, the orphaned adult club is a small club.  Those of us with membership know the experience first-hand and we are aware we can oscillate from feelings of joy to crushing grief, and everything in between.  The question is then, if the club is so small why is everyone around you a nouveau expert on dealing with grief?  Even more exasperating is that you may find that everyone around you feels the incessant need to tell you the following:\n\n1.) how to grieve,\n2.) their approximation of grieving timelines (of course this timeline/schedule is usually finely developed based on their quick google search or other perceptions of a phenomenon they may or may not have experience with), and\n3.) when you are not following their pre-defined ‘schedule’ of where you should be in the grieving/healing process.\n\nIronically, these convenient, self-proclaimed 'experts’ forget that at some point you have to move on and start ‘living’ your life again. Despite the intelligence of these experts, very rarely do they extend their intellectual prowess into how you are to transition from grief to regaining some semblance of your life. In the expert opinion of your friends, family and work colleagues, they believe that at the prescribed time your grief will subside, the process is over, and you will be back to your old self and old routines. Very much like—BAM—you wake up and it’s over. The pain is gone, and you are back to you who you were before your loss. Seriously? Does that sound reasonable?\n \nI was recently on the phone with a friend and was explaining my idea for the blog you are now reading.  The call was cut short as she interrupted and informed me that my idea was ill advised, poorly constructed, and was a feeble attempt to avoid my grieving process.  What? I am blogging about my grieving process--I would say that classifies me as being intimately familiar with it.  This friend has the experience of losing a parent, but what shocked me was the blatant disregard that this was not my first rodeo on the grief train.  I am no stranger to the grief process, and unlike her situation, I do not have an extended family of grandparents, aunts, uncles and 50 plus first and second cousins to reach out to for support.  No, in my situation I have a brother, sister-in-law and niece.  There is no one else!  \n \nI turn to friends to bounce ideas off and obtain that ‘you can do it’ support because I lack familial options.   This blog is a way for me to express my thoughts and experiences about being an adult orphan.   Despite the fact that this is a small club, everyone I speak with, seems to be an expert of what I am going through, what I should be doing, and how others will respond to my ambitions.  This website and blog have not been popular among my friends who have been informed of it and my goals.  Perhaps it is their fear of not wanting to see me put myself out there and possibly end up hurt that causes their extreme anti-support.  It is downright exhausting trying to defend myself from others who truly have no experience in the grief process—let alone the orphan club.  It is hard enough to tackle my days to put myself and my emotions out there for other's to read let alone combat their reservations of my actions.  \n \nThe heartless side of me wants to sit and wait until someone close to them dies and when it happens politely re-hash and implement their timelines and philosophies when they encounter their own first grieving process.  See if they like their own 'medicine'. But no, I could not see myself doing that to others.  I realize they will have their own special idiots in their life to deal with when they grieve their loved ones--I do not need to add to their pain as they may have done to me.",
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      "body": "http://i67.tinypic.com/2s8folh.jpg\nA loved one has passed, and for many the right of ownership to personal property is clear.  I think people in general do not have ill intent of heart and when a loved one passes away the deceased party’s final wishes are upheld.  Maybe it is wishful thinking.  I hope that no one else has (or is having) to deal with the unfortunate circumstances of thieves-- but my life is strife with them.  Nothing speaks more highly of the individuals claiming to love your loved one than those who pillage and plunder his belongings not even an hour after his departure.  It takes a special kind of scavenger to be so cruel but alas, they exist. \n \nNot a mere hour after his body was carted away the scavengers and vultures that surrounded my father in his final moments circled.  The prize?  His valuables and those personal possessions that could be used as leverage against his family and friends.  In a blink of an eye, my father’s possessions were taken from him.  His long time quasi girlfriend and her klan of bandits raided the home he lived in.   Easily liquefiable assets such as loose gemstones, family jewelry and guns….gone—packed up into the back of a hatchback coupe.  Family pictures and gifts given to him by his children are hoarded away, locked into containers on property that his kids cannot access.  His joint bank accounts are emptied. \n \nAs the final items were locked away, tears filled their eyes and sobs jumped down their throats, phone calls were placed to his children to inform us of our father’s passing.  Words of love and other condolences are given by the klan; but no such word, mention or breath is offered that they also robbed the man they claimed to love so dearly.  It was a crime of convenience really, as both my brother and I live in different states. \n \nWe flew in from across the country to mourn our father, handle his remains, and safeguard whatever belongings our father left.  As much as I wish it were not true, my brother and I were sheep and blind to the harrowing truth that we encountered.  Two lambs led to the den by a monster in wolf’s clothing—a.k.a. dad’s longtime girlfriend.  Within 24 hours of our father’s passing, my brother and I arrive and are met with cold shoulders and stonewalls.  The small ultra-religious community in which my father lived has closed ranks around their own ‘kind’. \n \nThere are no softly spoken condolences, no hugs, no words of encouragement offered by the community or from the klan of bandits—but there are demands.  Demands for rights to see the deceased, demands for a public funeral, demands for his ashes and demands that his children go away empty handed with not even a picture of their deceased loved one.  Our father’s personal property is held as leverage against us in a game of tit for tat. Allow them access to the body and maybe we can get part of our family’s heirlooms back.  Roll out the big top, pay for the dancing bears, and put on a circus of a public funeral and give over rights to his ashes and maybe, just maybe, we can have our family’s pictures and other belongings.  The actions of the girlfriend and her klan, their demands and behaviors leave a rank and rotten taste in my mouth.  They seek to maximize and capitalize on my dad’s death, always looking for ways to endear themselves in their community in a pathetic attempt to seek out cash and food donations.  Their actions are sick, twisted and cruel to a level that many cannot fathom.   \n \nCops from two local authorities were called, attorneys were consulted, and in the end my brother and I made a difficult decision.  As our father had no will in place at the time of death, we decided to keep our father’s ashes and were forced to leave without our childhood items, without our family pictures, and without the final belongings of our mother and father.  In their game of tit for tat, in exchange to view our father’s body before cremation my brother and I are given a few pieces of heirloom family jewelry and an antique .22 revolver.  The parting blow was a warning to play nice, as that in addition to our childhood belongings and our father’s belongings, they now also possess our mother’s remaining items that our father held in storage. Within 3 days my brother and I lost a father, have all possessions held for ransom, and are cruelly kicked in the gut with memories of the loss of our mother as well.  It would seem that not-everyone is as kind of heart as my brother and I are.  My cup has ran over as my patience runs dry.\n \nWe keep our legal options in mind as we sit and ponder what in the world our father was thinking when he invited this nest of vipers into our lives.  Having family pictures, my childhood stamp collection, my baby book, and my mother’s wedding dress would be nice to have to share with future generations and to look upon to reflect and remember events and stories.  But even without them I still have my memories and those cannot be taken away.  Perhaps it is a blessing in disguise as the experience makes me value more the memories I have and not the tangible items that would add clutter to my life. The jury is out and likely will be for a while.",
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