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      "body": "Did you ever wonder whats going on behind the scene of immigration when you enter american territory? Here is my personal story and I would wish that people become more aware of this injustice treatment.\n\nI enter the plane. My heart is racing. I sit down and pray to the universe that my dogs will be fine and I will reunite with them in 24 hours. My first stop will be Houston, then further onto LA and Phoenix. What a long journey ahead, but I feel excited. I will finally see my desert parents again.  I am longing for their tranquil lifestyle after all the drama, trauma and chaos of the last few months. I lie my head down and crash. I feel so exhausted. My knee is pulsing from the motorcycle accident last night. Still bloody and dirty. My feet are covered with mud. Oh girl, it’s really time to take a break from this crazy jungle adventure. \nThe bling of the seat belt signs chimes. We are almost there. I can’t wait to feel safe again in the western world.  I understand the language of the people and I have good friends. They will take care of me for a little while, until I gain back my strength. \nThe airship lands. I limp through the gate tunnels into the airport. I am in so much pain, I can hardly stand up. Oh, there are the wheelchair pushers. I ask them for help. The guy asks if I can wait a bit, because they are going on break now. I have my connecting flight in a couple of hours.  I don’t want to risk a delay. So, I hobble on. \nDamn, where are the toilets? I forgot that I have some weed in my pocket. Wtf no restroom? It’s just a hallway with nothing in it. Alright I need to get rid of this shit ASAP. I throw it in the corner and hope that no cameras see me. Big Brother is always watching around here. I dismissed this from my mind. I remember now, I am actually back in the normal world. \nGood, I’m clean. I have nothing to hide. I’m lined up and armed with my passport. I can’t stand up anymore. My wound is seriously troubling me. I sit on my bag, while waiting patiently in line to get through US immigration. \nFinally my turn. I walk to the serious looking officer. I answer all his questions honestly. “I am on my way to Phoenix where I will get picked up from my good friends. They will host me during my vacation and cover my return ticket. Afterwards, we will all travel to my parents’ home in Germany… for Christmas.” He asks me, “Why are your feet so dirty?”  I replied, “I just moved out of the jungle in Costa Rica. It’s rainy season there right now. I had no time to clean up.” Well, apparently he didn’t like what I said.\nAnother officer came and he leads me into a waiting room. He orders me to sit down. I was confused. Where was I? What’s happening? Why am I here? I look around. The sign says, “No cell phones allowed.” The other people in the room are very quiet. Nobody is talking. Every now and then, someone goes up to the front desk, or they get brought into one of the rooms attached to the waiting area. I go to the lady at the desk and question her, “Where am I? Why I am here?” She doesn’t answer and tells me to sit down until I get called. I follow her request. After waiting a while in my chair, I get impatient and think, “Who cares what they say…  I’m just going to leave.”  I really need to catch my flight and they don’t seem to care much.” I walk to the door. An officer stops me and says, “You can’t leave this waiting room.” All of a sudden a hot rush bubbles up inside of me. It feels like claustrophobic anxiety is overwhelming me. What? I cannot be free and go where I want to? In this moment, I finally grasp the seriousness of the situation that I am in. I guess I have to obey for now. I go back to my seat and slide over to ask the neighboring lady where we are. She is a very cool, relaxed French woman who lived many years in Columbia. She is in her mid 30’s. Her travel plan is to go shopping in New York and enjoy herself for a week. She gives me some more clarity about what’s going on. She whispers that the people in here waiting might or might not be able to enter the United States. This completely blows my mind. Never would I have thought to find myself, as a rule abiding German, in a situation to not be able to enter a country... especially, not our good old friend the USA. Utterly confused, I needed some time to digest this. I walk to the bathroom, pondering, “What does this mean? What happens if I can’t enter the United States? What happens with my dogs, with my travel plans, with my dessert parents, my injury, and my finances?” It feels like my whole life is starting to fall apart. All I’m longing for is some peace and this is what I’m getting? I start to panic. Someone from outside of the bathroom is talking to me. I open the door and it’s another uniformed person. She asked me to follow her. She opens the entryway back to the airport hall. I felt relief. I’m out. They are letting me out. Everything is just a big misunderstanding and they have come to their senses. They checked my passport and saw that I am not a criminal. Cool, I can catch my connecting flight now. The woman directs me through the hallway and down the stairs to the baggage claim area. Suddenly, my eyes open wide. I see my suitcase sitting there. She asks me to pick my belongings up and take them back to the waiting room. All my hopeful feelings dissipate in a heartbeat. I ask her, “What happens now?” She says I need to wait until the officials speak to me, and that they will put me on the next flight if I miss mine. I’m telling myself , “Alright, then just stay calm.” My dogs, in cargo, are on a different plane. It will take them 7 hours longer to arrive in Phoenix anyway. All I need to do, is call my friends so they know I’m stuck in immigration.\nBack in the secondary inspection area, I take a seat next to the trustworthy French-Columbian woman. We start to share our story. Suddenly, we get interrupted. A forceful voice orders me to shut up and sit back in my seat. What, I am not allowed to talk? They forbid me my freedom of speech? Holy crap, I feel like I’m back in elementary school. Who do they think they are? Why do they have all this power over me? What did I do? I feel angry and disempowered. This is unfair! They treat me like a criminal and a child. Intimidated, I sit back on my seat and wait for a border protection official to invite me into their investigation room. \n\n\nI end up with a young woman. She had long bleached blonde hair and blue eyes. I’m allowed to make one phone call. I call my desert Mom, Sandy. She can hear that I am in despair. She calms me down.  I am scared. I’m crying. I tell her, “The dogs will arrive in Phoenix at midnight, but I’m not sure if I will get to my connection flight on time.” I give my friend the number of the dog transportation company. I tell her, “Please call them and check where my furry kids are, and if they are ok. Those two dogs mean the world to me.” Jette is an 11 year old, Portuguese street dog. I picked her up from in front of my surf camp. She was just a tiny ball of hairy fluff. She looks like a golden Labrador/Sheppard dog mix. Since that time, she has always been my traveling companion through life.  We share a huge bond. Jascha, a terrier mix, became her little sister a few years ago. She was neglected and not cared for. The owner let her sleep in the snow and rain. He didn’t feed her. I gave her a safe warm place, and we became a trio. She was the cutest trouble maker that I have ever seen. Jascha turned my whole life upside down. She was a big reason that I left Germany and moved to Costa Rica.\nMiss O’Brian starts to ask me all sorts of questions. I have nothing to lie about. So, I answer them as honestly as possible. She seems cold, non-caring, and almost robotic behind her grey desk… in her stiff chair. She instructs me to wait outside to be called again. \nShe plays the interrogation game with me… for many hours. Answering questions, asking me to wait outside, and then asking me back inside. After the second round, I request a lawyer. I thought, that’s what people in the movies would do at this point. She responds firmly, “You have no rights at this time. That includes no right for legal counsel.” Now, I was really wondering, “Where the heck am I? I have no rights?”  What a horrible feeling. They took my freedom. They took my voice. I have to do whatever they say. This is ridiculous. Don’t they have something important to do? Something big to watch out for? I’m just an East German traveler, who lived the last two years in Central America. I want to have a little vacation at my friend’s Sonoran Desert Animal Rescue Center. Then I want to go back home, to Germany, with my dogs. See my parents and get back on my feet. I don’t deserve this.\nI spent the entire day with my lovely new acquaintance. I was required to swear with my hand on the Bible that, “I’m telling the truth and nothing but the truth… blab bla bla”. After all of that, Mrs. O’Brian and her crew came to the conclusion to not let me enter the United States of America. Shocker, I’m breaking down in tears. I can’t believe it. I stutter out, “Why?” She replies, “Personally, I would have let you enter, but my team thinks that you are suspect of wanting to live and work in this country.” “Bullshit,” I shout. She says, “They assume that you want to work at the ranch, so that your friends will pay your ticket back to Germany.” “That’s absurd, just because your narrow minds cannot grasp that my friends want to gift me a ticket home? And yes, I will feed some of their animals at the ranch, because I love them and love doing this work… but not in exchange for money. I am not working illegally. These guys are like my parents. I have not violated any of the laws of the United States, in any way. I want to talk to your supervisor.”\nA big, fat, black woman enters the small torture room. I love different cultures and backgrounds, but she was just so cliché. She was the unkindest, most uncompassionate, bloody heartless creature I’ve ever met. There was no discussion with her. She just kept repeating, “We will refuse you entry into the United States”. I feel depleted. \nThey bring me into a separate room and strip search me. Now, they are really starting to treat me like a criminal. A little Asian woman is touching me from head to toe. She grabs my breasts and my genital area. I feel raped. She hammers on my freshly wounded knee. I’m screaming out load. I spin around and snap at her to be careful. It hurts like hell. The Asian slut and her supervisor yell at me to turn back around. “Man, they take their stupid job seriously around here.” She keeps on banging on my wound. I have the same reaction. Now, I’m shouting more forcefully back at them. I’m in anger. I’m in rage. I can’t believe I have to let them do this to me. Finally, they lead me back to my seat. I realize that I have nothing to lose anymore. I can feel some inner power stirring. I speak to the people remaining in the waiting hall, “Why do we let them do this to us? What did you do? Are you a criminal? Do they have any rights to keep us here? Doesn’t the world belong to all of us? We are not bad people. We are just on our journey of life and they cock block us from following our plans.” Of course, they immediately tell me to shut my mouth. \nIn the end, three men and three women are still remaining to be processed. There was a Latino guy, who has been legal in America, since childhood.  He only left America a few days ago, to attend his father’s funeral in Mexico. He has a young son in New York, staying with his nanny, desperately awaiting his father’s return. Then there is an old, super sweet couple from Guatemala. They are probably around eighty years old. They have a son, born and raised in the states, living in Oregon. He just lost his young daughter in an accident. His parents came to support him emotionally in his grieving process. In addition, there was the French lady, myself, and another guy all waiting to hear our fate.\nGreat job US immigration! You are real American heroes! Protecting this country so diligently! You can be proud of yourselves when you go home to your families each night! You have destroyed countless lives, destinies, futures, travel plans and unions of loved ones. God bless America!\nLastly at 9pm, they brought us outside. They separated us into two different paddy wagons, heading to the Houston detention center. The women were in handcuffs and the men in hand/foot shackles. I panicked shortly, about being handcuffed behind my back.  I probably would have freaked out like a mad woman and hyperventilate due to claustrophobia. Thank God, they cuffed my wrists in the front. \nThey bring us inside the cells. It’s freezing cold there, and just concrete benches. I’m wondering how we will survive the night. I’m in shorts and t-shirt. The grandma in her Guatemalan skirt and a thin blouse. I’m asking the guard for blankets. She replies,” You don’t get blankets.” I lose it, “What? No blankets! You see this old lady here? She has diabetes and she has no medication. She has such thin clothes. You can’t do that. She might die otherwise.” The guard didn’t care. Then our hero from Columbia whispered some sense into her. Wow, she knew how to handle the authorities. She brought us three blankets instantly.  The three of us cuddled together like worms on the concrete floor of this cell and hoped for the morning soon to come.\nNowadays, I am thankful for this experience. It opened my eyes to what is actually going on in the world. It convinced me to not trust the authorities. I need to lie, put on a mask and blend in, if I want them to leave me in peace.  It sharpened my awareness of how inhumane “so called” humans can be. It gave me the understanding that I am my own authentic person and follow my own rules. This incident took the fear away from me. The fear of breaking the law. You get fucked anyways, so do what you want to do. “These are not the droids you’re looking for”, became one of my best practiced Jedi skills up to this day.\n\nThanks for reading!",
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      "body": "I came across this article about emotional maturity and immaturity. To become conscious aware of the direction of our choices is important so we can see where we are at in our self development progress.\n\nBy Roger Allen\nHow to Become Emotionally Mature\n\n\nHal hated Charlie, everything about him, from his knowing sneer to his rolling swagger. When he saw him enter the restaurant with Keith, he wished fervently he could get away and considered getting up and walking out of the breakfast meeting, without a word to either of his two former partners. But then he garnered his faculties and decided to accept this reality. He would choose how to respond, and his choice would be to be cordial and cooperative. He felt a surge of strength as he realized that handling himself in a dignified manner with both these men would be a bigger personal victory than if he met with Keith alone.\n\n– Excerpt from The Hero’s Choice: Living from the Inside Out\n\nThis passage gives you a little insight into emotional maturity. Hal’s immediate reaction was to simply act out his negative emotions. Instead, he made a decision to respond in a more positive (emotionally mature) way. Notice how that decision resulted in a shift in his emotional energy.\n\nI define emotional maturity as the ability to make good, positive, healthy choices during the challenges of life. The following chart illustrates some of the differences in the mindset of someone who is acting emotionally immature vs. mature.\n\nEmotional Immaturity                                                                     Emotional Maturity\n\n- Reactive (Life happens to me)                                                   - Proactive (I make choices)\n- Act out emotions                                                                             -  Act on emotions\n- Governed by habits                                                                        - Governed by vision/purpose\n- Come from fear/scarcity                                                               - Come from love/abundance\n- “Have to” motivation                                                                     - “Choose to” motivation\n- Getting (self-centered)                                                                  - Giving (other-centered)\n- Seek security and self-protection                                             - Step outside comfort zone\n- Avoid failure, rejection, discomfort                                          - Seek growth\n- Separation/alienation from others                                           - Unity/goodwill with others\n- Live in the past/future                                                                    - Live in the present\n\nI label difficult, upsetting events “key moments.” These are events that trigger strong emotions and so it is easy to become defensive or reactive.\n\nWe experience key moments every day. Some are relatively minor (a child knocking over a glass of milk) or others quite threatening (watching a child flounder or losing a job).\n\nConsciously or unconsciously, we make choices during our key moments, and the quality of our lives is determined by these choices. If we make good choices we grow in confidence, personal effectiveness, and enjoyable relationships (emotional maturity). When we make poor choices we become less effective, eventually feeling like nothing more than a pawn of life circumstances (emotional immaturity).\n\nHowever, making good choices is not easy. In fact, Hal (from the incident above) could not sustain his intent to be cordial and cooperative. He totally lost his composure when his former partners threatened him with a lawsuit. Hal eventually regained his bearings and learned to respond positively to such key moments, but not before sinking into a morass of self-pity and vengeance.\n\nI’m going to suggest that our key moments are how we develop emotional maturity. We don’t become more mature when the waters of life are calm and placid and everything is going our way. We grow in maturity when in turbulent, choppy waters. When tempted to act out our fears, hurts, or resentments.\n\nSo the question is, how do we develop emotional maturity? Here are five steps to go through when you face the key moments of your life. Think about a recent key moment. Then read the five steps and apply them to your situation. It’s not easy, at first, like learning any new skill. But as you practice, you’ll get better. You’ll gradually become more emotionally mature, living on the right rather than left side of the chart up above.\n\nStep 1: Be present. You can’t choose better responses to your key moments if you’re asleep at the wheel. You have to wake up and become fully conscious and present to what is happening both within and around you. If not alert and aware, you’ll quickly slip into old, habitual, negative ways of reacting. Being present does not making responding easy. But it does put you in the driver’s seat. It makes it possible. So, thinking about your key moment, what was the triggering event? What, specifically, about the event triggered your reaction? What were your thoughts? Feelings? What did you do? What were the consequences?\n\nBy being present you begin to take your power back. In fact, do you realize that this moment is all you have? When can you be happy (or miserable)? When can you be confident? When can you make choices? It all happens in this moment, not the past or future. Being present to this moment is the gateway to change and emotional maturity.\n\nStep 2: Embrace Reality. Reality is “what is” or “the way things are.” It exists independently of your opinions about it. Embrace it and find peace. Resist it and experience pain and frustration. Some of your realities you chose (career, who you married) and others were thrust upon you by your heritage (your stature, age) or other factors outside your control. Nevertheless, they form the boundaries or parameters within which you live and make choices daily. This is not to say that you can’t change some realities. Some you can. Some you can’t. But at this moment (which is the only moment that is real), what is, is. To be happy and effective, you must acknowledge and respect rather than fight against the realities of your life.\n\nDenying, avoiding, complaining, or refusing to think about uncomfortable realities gives those very things incredible power over your life. If you are worried about your finances, sit down and take stock of exactly where you are — how much you owe, for example, and exactly how you will pay it off. Fun? No. Wildly uncomfortable? Words can’t express it! But by taking ownership of the reality, you’ve now equipped yourself to change it.\n\nStep 3: Exercise Responsibility. Responsibility has to do with the choices you make about how to think, feel and act about reality. The quality of your life depends on your ability to make good choices—choices consistent with your best self and long-term best-interest—in spite of what happens to you. Your personal experience and the results you get in life are influenced, not determined, by circumstances, events, and other people. Between an event and your response is a moment, however fleeting, when you decide whether to surrender control and react automatically, or to interrupt a negative pattern and search out responses more in alignment with your long-term self-interest.\n\nSo again, think about your key moment. What choices did you make? What were the consequences? What other choices might you have made? How would they have led to a different outcome?\n\nStep 4: Clarify Your Vision. What do you really want? What is most important to you? Being clear about your vision gives you the motivation or incentive to make good choices when in a key moment. It is easy to follow the path of least resistance or act out negative emotions. But, if you’ve thought about what you want, if you have a clear vision of the outcomes you desire for yourself and others, then it becomes easier to delay immediate gratification and exercise the discipline to make a positive and strengthening choice. A clear vision allows you to be ruled by something other than impulse and circumstance. Define what you want. Deepen it so that it becomes more important than what you’re currently getting.\n\nStep 5: Act from Integrity. This is where the rubber meets the road. No excuses. No whining. Acting from integrity is bringing what you say and do into alignment with what you really want. It is acting consistently with your higher vision. It is living by commitment rather than ease, discipline rather than convenience. Acting from integrity requires that you give up short-term payoffs (immediate gratification, escape, avoidance, self-indulgence, revenge, etc.) for something that is bigger or more fulfilling in the long-run. It requires that you pay a price (delay of gratification, quieting your tongue, facing a problem, entering into a difficult conversation, etc.). The price you pay is like your admission into the world of emotional maturity. You’ve earned it.\n\nSo, consider your key moment. What new actions are you willing to take? Things won’t magically change. You change them by making new choices and behaving in a new way.\n\nHal faced one key moment after another. Kind of like all of us. Initially, he didn’t handle them well. He wanted to defend himself. He wanted others to change. But gradually, he learned better ways of responding. He grew up. He became emotionally mature.\n\n“I’m doing great, Mom,” Hal said, his eyes smiling. She was still her acerbic self, but Hal could see the warmth and caring in her eyes. “Hey, would you mind doing something for me, Mom?”\n\n“What’s that?” She looked at him quizzically.\n\n“Give me a big, squishy momma hug.”\n\nVirginia stepped back in mock alarm. “Whatever for?”\n\n“No reason. Just indulge me. Okay?”\n\nShe approached him hesitantly, then took him in her arms. Her embrace was stiff at first, but Hal opened himself to receive it. He realized she had hugged him many times over the years, but he’d not let them in. He’d decided long ago that she didn’t really mean them. Her stance softened, and Hal felt moisture where their cheeks pressed together.\n\nUp to this minute, Hal had believed, rather self-righteously, that he needed to forgive her for always brushing him off. But he felt her love and now knew the truth. He needed to ask her forgiveness for brushing her off all these many years. What an irony.\n\n–Excerpt from The Hero’s Choice",
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