VOTING POWER100.00%
DOWNVOTE POWER100.00%
RESOURCE CREDITS100.00%
REPUTATION PROGRESS76.22%
Net Worth
0.212USD
STEEM
0.000STEEM
SBD
0.362SBD
Effective Power
5.001SP
├── Own SP
0.629SP
└── Incoming DelegationsDeleg
+4.372SP
Detailed Balance
| STEEM | ||
| balance | 0.000STEEM | STEEM |
| market_balance | 0.000STEEM | STEEM |
| savings_balance | 0.000STEEM | STEEM |
| reward_steem_balance | 0.000STEEM | STEEM |
| STEEM POWER | ||
| Own SP | 0.629SP | SP |
| Delegated Out | 0.000SP | SP |
| Delegation In | 4.372SP | SP |
| Effective Power | 5.001SP | SP |
| Reward SP (pending) | 0.074SP | SP |
| SBD | ||
| sbd_balance | 0.000SBD | SBD |
| sbd_conversions | 0.000SBD | SBD |
| sbd_market_balance | 0.000SBD | SBD |
| savings_sbd_balance | 0.000SBD | SBD |
| reward_sbd_balance | 0.362SBD | SBD |
{
"balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"savings_balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"reward_steem_balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"vesting_shares": "1024.204278 VESTS",
"delegated_vesting_shares": "0.000000 VESTS",
"received_vesting_shares": "7119.455528 VESTS",
"sbd_balance": "0.000 SBD",
"savings_sbd_balance": "0.000 SBD",
"reward_sbd_balance": "0.362 SBD",
"conversions": []
}Account Info
| name | swordpen |
| id | 582579 |
| rank | 1,381,461 |
| reputation | 1569648078 |
| created | 2018-01-08T15:37:24 |
| recovery_account | steem |
| proxy | None |
| post_count | 71 |
| comment_count | 0 |
| lifetime_vote_count | 0 |
| witnesses_voted_for | 0 |
| last_post | 2018-03-07T20:04:24 |
| last_root_post | 2018-02-19T07:11:48 |
| last_vote_time | 2018-02-10T08:52:09 |
| proxied_vsf_votes | 0, 0, 0, 0 |
| can_vote | 1 |
| voting_power | 0 |
| delayed_votes | 0 |
| balance | 0.000 STEEM |
| savings_balance | 0.000 STEEM |
| sbd_balance | 0.000 SBD |
| savings_sbd_balance | 0.000 SBD |
| vesting_shares | 1024.204278 VESTS |
| delegated_vesting_shares | 0.000000 VESTS |
| received_vesting_shares | 7119.455528 VESTS |
| reward_vesting_balance | 151.441566 VESTS |
| vesting_balance | 0.000 STEEM |
| vesting_withdraw_rate | 0.000000 VESTS |
| next_vesting_withdrawal | 1969-12-31T23:59:59 |
| withdrawn | 0 |
| to_withdraw | 0 |
| withdraw_routes | 0 |
| savings_withdraw_requests | 0 |
| last_account_recovery | 1970-01-01T00:00:00 |
| reset_account | null |
| last_owner_update | 2018-01-13T06:11:36 |
| last_account_update | 2018-01-22T07:11:54 |
| mined | No |
| sbd_seconds | 0 |
| sbd_last_interest_payment | 1970-01-01T00:00:00 |
| savings_sbd_last_interest_payment | 1970-01-01T00:00:00 |
{
"id": 582579,
"name": "swordpen",
"owner": {
"weight_threshold": 1,
"account_auths": [],
"key_auths": [
[
"STM87UxKjLXqXiWDbDTYDGHAdmj2sMZQYvM3gtpJLonMbCEaDqhbo",
1
]
]
},
"active": {
"weight_threshold": 1,
"account_auths": [],
"key_auths": [
[
"STM6JAJYKrL6MYTGCpdcWfZtmHBTJV8txFz6sTegp6au92T9fa44m",
1
]
]
},
"posting": {
"weight_threshold": 1,
"account_auths": [],
"key_auths": [
[
"STM5b86yWvK9HhKjJhjjt3C8yQPjpneMHKGGzpt4TgzMT2m3SCsBb",
1
]
]
},
"memo_key": "STM7prt6FZQ1XarzPJEr3dPkyyJKvGi7AodS49x8ZcCTyEXVkQK9R",
"json_metadata": "{\"profile\":{\"profile_image\":\"https://image.ibb.co/gnkNnR/2016_03_11_15_36_52.jpg\",\"name\":\"swordpen\",\"about\":\"Fiction writer, podcaster and crypto enthusiaist.\",\"location\":\"Birmingham, Al\",\"cover_image\":\"https://ibb.co/byPWJb\"}}",
"posting_json_metadata": "{\"profile\":{\"profile_image\":\"https://image.ibb.co/gnkNnR/2016_03_11_15_36_52.jpg\",\"name\":\"swordpen\",\"about\":\"Fiction writer, podcaster and crypto enthusiaist.\",\"location\":\"Birmingham, Al\",\"cover_image\":\"https://ibb.co/byPWJb\"}}",
"proxy": "",
"last_owner_update": "2018-01-13T06:11:36",
"last_account_update": "2018-01-22T07:11:54",
"created": "2018-01-08T15:37:24",
"mined": false,
"recovery_account": "steem",
"last_account_recovery": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
"reset_account": "null",
"comment_count": 0,
"lifetime_vote_count": 0,
"post_count": 71,
"can_vote": true,
"voting_manabar": {
"current_mana": "8143659806",
"last_update_time": 1779087999
},
"downvote_manabar": {
"current_mana": 2035914951,
"last_update_time": 1779087999
},
"voting_power": 0,
"balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"savings_balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"sbd_balance": "0.000 SBD",
"sbd_seconds": "0",
"sbd_seconds_last_update": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
"sbd_last_interest_payment": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
"savings_sbd_balance": "0.000 SBD",
"savings_sbd_seconds": "0",
"savings_sbd_seconds_last_update": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
"savings_sbd_last_interest_payment": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
"savings_withdraw_requests": 0,
"reward_sbd_balance": "0.362 SBD",
"reward_steem_balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"reward_vesting_balance": "151.441566 VESTS",
"reward_vesting_steem": "0.074 STEEM",
"vesting_shares": "1024.204278 VESTS",
"delegated_vesting_shares": "0.000000 VESTS",
"received_vesting_shares": "7119.455528 VESTS",
"vesting_withdraw_rate": "0.000000 VESTS",
"next_vesting_withdrawal": "1969-12-31T23:59:59",
"withdrawn": 0,
"to_withdraw": 0,
"withdraw_routes": 0,
"curation_rewards": 6,
"posting_rewards": 134,
"proxied_vsf_votes": [
0,
0,
0,
0
],
"witnesses_voted_for": 0,
"last_post": "2018-03-07T20:04:24",
"last_root_post": "2018-02-19T07:11:48",
"last_vote_time": "2018-02-10T08:52:09",
"post_bandwidth": 0,
"pending_claimed_accounts": 0,
"vesting_balance": "0.000 STEEM",
"reputation": 1569648078,
"transfer_history": [],
"market_history": [],
"post_history": [],
"vote_history": [],
"other_history": [],
"witness_votes": [],
"tags_usage": [],
"guest_bloggers": [],
"rank": 1381461
}Withdraw Routes
| Incoming | Outgoing |
|---|---|
Empty | Empty |
{
"incoming": [],
"outgoing": []
}From Date
To Date
2026/05/18 07:06:39
2026/05/18 07:06:39
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 7119.455528 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #106151643/Trx a52062e8803fe720616c0098292c2d01a1d7fd6e |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "a52062e8803fe720616c0098292c2d01a1d7fd6e",
"block": 106151643,
"trx_in_block": 0,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2026-05-18T07:06:39",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "7119.455528 VESTS"
}
]
}2026/05/13 07:42:27
2026/05/13 07:42:27
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 4407.245123 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #106009074/Trx e010181ba90b1c4dfe5470b4ccd0b4993fa62d94 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "e010181ba90b1c4dfe5470b4ccd0b4993fa62d94",
"block": 106009074,
"trx_in_block": 0,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2026-05-13T07:42:27",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "4407.245123 VESTS"
}
]
}2026/04/26 06:17:15
2026/04/26 06:17:15
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 7131.971284 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #105519105/Trx 705feec4c421a0d42943a7c278dcb7e4e4b1ff42 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "705feec4c421a0d42943a7c278dcb7e4e4b1ff42",
"block": 105519105,
"trx_in_block": 1,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2026-04-26T06:17:15",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "7131.971284 VESTS"
}
]
}2026/01/24 02:15:42
2026/01/24 02:15:42
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 4448.791942 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #102873924/Trx 32e1695dd789ea29eb682a080824fe61c07b11ff |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "32e1695dd789ea29eb682a080824fe61c07b11ff",
"block": 102873924,
"trx_in_block": 0,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2026-01-24T02:15:42",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "4448.791942 VESTS"
}
]
}2024/12/17 21:24:57
2024/12/17 21:24:57
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 4613.011139 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #91320124/Trx 34b28f1c06702ae22b53e68f756672e362d4f2b3 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "34b28f1c06702ae22b53e68f756672e362d4f2b3",
"block": 91320124,
"trx_in_block": 1,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2024-12-17T21:24:57",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "4613.011139 VESTS"
}
]
}2023/11/14 13:04:27
2023/11/14 13:04:27
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 4782.144671 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #79874232/Trx a075a592dd3595d6cf99c252469d764652aa6025 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "a075a592dd3595d6cf99c252469d764652aa6025",
"block": 79874232,
"trx_in_block": 4,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2023-11-14T13:04:27",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "4782.144671 VESTS"
}
]
}2023/09/22 11:22:06
2023/09/22 11:22:06
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 7719.053457 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #78364032/Trx e2020fe6c4606b5bbadce4331451ea55b783362f |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "e2020fe6c4606b5bbadce4331451ea55b783362f",
"block": 78364032,
"trx_in_block": 1,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2023-09-22T11:22:06",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "7719.053457 VESTS"
}
]
}2022/11/03 18:42:42
2022/11/03 18:42:42
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 7941.104895 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #69121631/Trx e7e081e7eca9ff447409545213200c21295d1aa8 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "e7e081e7eca9ff447409545213200c21295d1aa8",
"block": 69121631,
"trx_in_block": 6,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2022-11-03T18:42:42",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "7941.104895 VESTS"
}
]
}2022/01/17 23:49:33
2022/01/17 23:49:33
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8161.212496 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #60824782/Trx ff9d7740bfa91d086210faaa43e5ec2c723df6e8 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "ff9d7740bfa91d086210faaa43e5ec2c723df6e8",
"block": 60824782,
"trx_in_block": 21,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2022-01-17T23:49:33",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8161.212496 VESTS"
}
]
}2021/06/14 06:58:21
2021/06/14 06:58:21
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8345.406784 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #54615060/Trx 88c208b3565e4ca636c9ebfea180ab587bc3ff4a |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "88c208b3565e4ca636c9ebfea180ab587bc3ff4a",
"block": 54615060,
"trx_in_block": 5,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2021-06-14T06:58:21",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8345.406784 VESTS"
}
]
}2021/04/09 14:43:12
2021/04/09 14:43:12
| voter | trashartmanifest |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | the-lesser-banishing-ritual-of-the-pentagram-it-s-history-applications-and-potential-for-your-life |
| weight | 10000 (100.00%) |
| Transaction Info | Block #52739750/Trx 8fec29055d3197ea1d7e982488255746b77b8141 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "8fec29055d3197ea1d7e982488255746b77b8141",
"block": 52739750,
"trx_in_block": 4,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2021-04-09T14:43:12",
"op": [
"vote",
{
"voter": "trashartmanifest",
"author": "swordpen",
"permlink": "the-lesser-banishing-ritual-of-the-pentagram-it-s-history-applications-and-potential-for-your-life",
"weight": 10000
}
]
}2020/12/11 17:10:00
2020/12/11 17:10:00
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8532.828758 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #49362301/Trx 6cc18c215e0964a5542219f5a7a91e34dde0f4e5 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "6cc18c215e0964a5542219f5a7a91e34dde0f4e5",
"block": 49362301,
"trx_in_block": 11,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-12-11T17:10:00",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8532.828758 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/12/06 10:45:15
2020/12/06 10:45:15
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 1912.543513 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #49213809/Trx 2240b8fb1442aa7648eddbef79055c38202728b9 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "2240b8fb1442aa7648eddbef79055c38202728b9",
"block": 49213809,
"trx_in_block": 3,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-12-06T10:45:15",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "1912.543513 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/12/05 20:47:54
2020/12/05 20:47:54
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8539.036612 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #49197389/Trx 3abae2d6d17f9863c70e66fb12cca03333210d89 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "3abae2d6d17f9863c70e66fb12cca03333210d89",
"block": 49197389,
"trx_in_block": 1,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-12-05T20:47:54",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8539.036612 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/11/03 04:12:48
2020/11/03 04:12:48
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 1920.017158 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #48272607/Trx 836599c15f1d4437c21f944dce9538a23b3f0658 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "836599c15f1d4437c21f944dce9538a23b3f0658",
"block": 48272607,
"trx_in_block": 5,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-11-03T04:12:48",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "1920.017158 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/05/09 11:49:12
2020/05/09 11:49:12
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8741.841971 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #43224157/Trx 061ccfc732de1d4d09f8744630260faf0c5513de |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "061ccfc732de1d4d09f8744630260faf0c5513de",
"block": 43224157,
"trx_in_block": 25,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-05-09T11:49:12",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8741.841971 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/05/08 16:19:51
2020/05/08 16:19:51
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 1953.311140 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #43201326/Trx b18725c3bdf9af7c4d67863fe95218250aa016e8 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "b18725c3bdf9af7c4d67863fe95218250aa016e8",
"block": 43201326,
"trx_in_block": 9,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-05-08T16:19:51",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "1953.311140 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/05/05 05:54:21
2020/05/05 05:54:21
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8744.099869 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #43104788/Trx 6b64b69d712fb0d1b3533a05e8a663646e88e4e2 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "6b64b69d712fb0d1b3533a05e8a663646e88e4e2",
"block": 43104788,
"trx_in_block": 4,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-05-05T05:54:21",
"op": [
"delegate_vesting_shares",
{
"delegator": "steem",
"delegatee": "swordpen",
"vesting_shares": "8744.099869 VESTS"
}
]
}2020/01/08 17:29:30
2020/01/08 17:29:30
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| author | steemitboard |
| permlink | steemitboard-notify-swordpen-20200108t172929000z |
| title | |
| body | Congratulations @swordpen! You received a personal award! <table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@swordpen/birthday2.png</td><td>Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 2 years!</td></tr></table> <sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@swordpen) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=swordpen)_</sub> ###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes! |
| json metadata | {"image":["https://steemitboard.com/img/notify.png"]} |
| Transaction Info | Block #39754505/Trx c68d17e24062dd3dd638a5e555f9911545d98a67 |
View Raw JSON Data
{
"trx_id": "c68d17e24062dd3dd638a5e555f9911545d98a67",
"block": 39754505,
"trx_in_block": 11,
"op_in_trx": 0,
"virtual_op": 0,
"timestamp": "2020-01-08T17:29:30",
"op": [
"comment",
{
"parent_author": "swordpen",
"parent_permlink": "new-avatar-power-ritual",
"author": "steemitboard",
"permlink": "steemitboard-notify-swordpen-20200108t172929000z",
"title": "",
"body": "Congratulations @swordpen! You received a personal award!\n\n<table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@swordpen/birthday2.png</td><td>Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 2 years!</td></tr></table>\n\n<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@swordpen) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=swordpen)_</sub>\n\n\n###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes!",
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}2019/05/31 08:25:27
2019/05/31 08:25:27
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 8939.501986 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #33384510/Trx eef1cd36aab605d23104a0723e76efaa0cf62398 |
View Raw JSON Data
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}2019/01/08 17:55:21
2019/01/08 17:55:21
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| author | steemitboard |
| permlink | steemitboard-notify-swordpen-20190108t175521000z |
| title | |
| body | Congratulations @swordpen! You received a personal award! <table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@swordpen/birthday1.png</td><td>1 Year on Steemit</td></tr></table> <sub>_[Click here to view your Board](https://steemitboard.com/@swordpen)_</sub> **Do not miss the last post from @steemitboard:** <table><tr><td><a href="https://steemit.com/steem/@steemitboard/steemwhales-has-officially-moved-to-steemitboard-ranking"><img src="https://steemitimages.com/64x128/https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmfRVpHQhLDhnjDtqck8GPv9NPvNKPfMsDaAFDE1D9Er2Z/header_ranking.png"></a></td><td><a href="https://steemit.com/steem/@steemitboard/steemwhales-has-officially-moved-to-steemitboard-ranking">SteemWhales has officially moved to SteemitBoard Ranking</a></td></tr><tr><td><a href="https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/steemitboard-witness-update-2019-01-07"><img src="https://steemitimages.com/64x128/http://i.cubeupload.com/7CiQEO.png"></a></td><td><a href="https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/steemitboard-witness-update-2019-01-07">SteemitBoard - Witness Update</a></td></tr></table> > Support [SteemitBoard's project](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)! **[Vote for its witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1)** and **get one more award**! |
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"body": "Congratulations @swordpen! You received a personal award!\n\n<table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@swordpen/birthday1.png</td><td>1 Year on Steemit</td></tr></table>\n\n<sub>_[Click here to view your Board](https://steemitboard.com/@swordpen)_</sub>\n\n\n**Do not miss the last post from @steemitboard:**\n<table><tr><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/steem/@steemitboard/steemwhales-has-officially-moved-to-steemitboard-ranking\"><img src=\"https://steemitimages.com/64x128/https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmfRVpHQhLDhnjDtqck8GPv9NPvNKPfMsDaAFDE1D9Er2Z/header_ranking.png\"></a></td><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/steem/@steemitboard/steemwhales-has-officially-moved-to-steemitboard-ranking\">SteemWhales has officially moved to SteemitBoard Ranking</a></td></tr><tr><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/steemitboard-witness-update-2019-01-07\"><img src=\"https://steemitimages.com/64x128/http://i.cubeupload.com/7CiQEO.png\"></a></td><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/steemitboard-witness-update-2019-01-07\">SteemitBoard - Witness Update</a></td></tr></table>\n\n> Support [SteemitBoard's project](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)! **[Vote for its witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1)** and **get one more award**!",
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}2018/06/06 21:11:21
2018/06/06 21:11:21
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 9138.842197 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #23095218/Trx e7ab4491dafa16fbd66cd9a34f69f0493c81deaf |
View Raw JSON Data
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}2018/05/18 21:02:39
2018/05/18 21:02:39
| delegator | steem |
| delegatee | swordpen |
| vesting shares | 29495.315647 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #22548344/Trx d33a731e4933550c64de6ab6a69f94adfdfb6496 |
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}2018/03/29 01:42:06
2018/03/29 01:42:06
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| author | steemitboard |
| permlink | steemitboard-notify-swordpen-20180329t014205000z |
| title | |
| body | Congratulations @swordpen! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) : [](http://steemitboard.com/@swordpen) Award for the number of upvotes received Click on any badge to view your own Board of Honor on SteemitBoard. For more information about SteemitBoard, click [here](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard) If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word `STOP` > Upvote this notification to help all Steemit users. Learn why [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)! |
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}2018/03/28 13:21:15
2018/03/28 13:21:15
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | living-with-sarcoma |
| author | gogreenbuddy |
| permlink | re-swordpen-living-with-sarcoma-20180328t132115340z |
| title | |
| body | Thanks for the tip about glutamine powder didn't know that. I also don't know why you got zero likes. great story. |
| json metadata | {"tags":["life"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
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"body": "Thanks for the tip about glutamine powder didn't know that. I also don't know why you got zero likes. great story.",
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}2018/03/08 09:48:36
2018/03/08 09:48:36
| voter | benkalashnikov |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-benkalashnikov-altcoins-vs-bitcoin-when-will-the-alt-season-start-20180307t200424139z |
| weight | 600 (6.00%) |
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}2018/03/08 09:48:00
2018/03/08 09:48:00
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | re-benkalashnikov-altcoins-vs-bitcoin-when-will-the-alt-season-start-20180307t200424139z |
| author | benkalashnikov |
| permlink | re-swordpen-re-benkalashnikov-altcoins-vs-bitcoin-when-will-the-alt-season-start-20180308t094800157z |
| title | |
| body | I see no reason why tether should have any part in this... |
| json metadata | {"tags":["bitcoin"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
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"body": "I see no reason why tether should have any part in this...",
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}2018/03/07 20:04:24
2018/03/07 20:04:24
| parent author | benkalashnikov |
| parent permlink | altcoins-vs-bitcoin-when-will-the-alt-season-start |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-benkalashnikov-altcoins-vs-bitcoin-when-will-the-alt-season-start-20180307t200424139z |
| title | |
| body | we are in a sea of red right now. Any thoughts on how much, if at all, tether is to blame? |
| json metadata | {"tags":["bitcoin"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
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"title": "",
"body": "we are in a sea of red right now. Any thoughts on how much, if at all, tether is to blame?",
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}whiteworker29upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / if-you-keep-reading2018/02/19 17:28:57
whiteworker29upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / if-you-keep-reading
2018/02/19 17:28:57
| voter | whiteworker29 |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | if-you-keep-reading |
| weight | 10000 (100.00%) |
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}voisenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / if-you-keep-reading2018/02/19 17:28:57
voisenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / if-you-keep-reading
2018/02/19 17:28:57
| voter | voisen |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | if-you-keep-reading |
| weight | 10000 (100.00%) |
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}2018/02/19 07:16:45
2018/02/19 07:16:45
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | re-haejin-cardano-ada-very-three-wavish-20180219t061159957z |
| author | minnowboosted |
| permlink | re-swordpen-re-haejin-cardano-ada-very-three-wavish-20180219t071645036z |
| title | |
| body | https://freephotoupload.com/images/2018/02/16/FlagMeme.png |
| json metadata | {"tags":["cardano"],"image":["https://freephotoupload.com/images/2018/02/16/FlagMeme.png"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
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}anomalyupvoted (1.00%) @swordpen / new-avatar-power-ritual2018/02/19 07:14:00
anomalyupvoted (1.00%) @swordpen / new-avatar-power-ritual
2018/02/19 07:14:00
| voter | anomaly |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| weight | 100 (1.00%) |
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}2018/02/19 07:12:15
2018/02/19 07:12:15
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| author | cheetah |
| permlink | cheetah-re-swordpennew-avatar-power-ritual |
| title | |
| body | Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in: http://theturningearthblog.blogspot.com/2014/02/1-relaxation-induction-call-to-arzel.html |
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"title": "",
"body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttp://theturningearthblog.blogspot.com/2014/02/1-relaxation-induction-call-to-arzel.html",
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}cheetahupvoted (0.08%) @swordpen / new-avatar-power-ritual2018/02/19 07:12:12
cheetahupvoted (0.08%) @swordpen / new-avatar-power-ritual
2018/02/19 07:12:12
| voter | cheetah |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| weight | 8 (0.08%) |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: new-avatar-power-ritual2018/02/19 07:11:48
swordpenpublished a new post: new-avatar-power-ritual
2018/02/19 07:11:48
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | occult |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | new-avatar-power-ritual |
| title | New Avatar Power Ritual |
| body | Pretty powerful, first part. THE NEW AVATAR POWER RITUAL Quietly read the following words aloud, listening to what you are saying. Read slowly and carefully, pausing between sentences, and stopping for about three seconds wherever you find three periods (...) in the text. It should take you a full four minutes to read the words aloud from beginning to end. You may record this on your computer and play it back for yourself instead of reading it each time. The point is to completely relax and feel good for a few minutes. "I am beginning the New Avatar Power Ritual. I call on the Inner Planes to witness. I state my purpose thus: ANKAR YOD HAY VAW HAY. I begin to wind down, to let go and be rid of all the tensions of my body. To let my muscles relax, unwind and let go. The tensions are beginning to drain from my body. Soon, a gradual heaviness will start to weigh down my thighs, my arms, my hands, my feet, my legs, my body. My muscles unwind and let go. All my muscles are relaxing, unwinding, and relaxing. Very soon I shall feel the winding, the letting go. Unwinding and letting go. Unwinding, letting go. Unwinding. Letting Go. Deeper and deeper...letting go...unwinding and letting go. The tensions drain from my muscles and they will soon become loose, letting go, relaxing and unwinding. Breathing easily and deeply. Easily and deeply. Unwinding and letting go...drifting into the peace and serenity of complete relaxation. And as my body unwinds and relaxes so I enter the peace and quiet, where only these words have meaning, and nothing else disturbs me. Letting go..unwinding...letting go...unwinding...relax...relax...relax...let go...let go...let go...relax...relax...relax...let go...let go...let go. I call on Thee, Mighty Arzel, who stands in the East, to assist me this and all my ventures. I know now that New Avatar Power is flooding to the surface. I now close my eyes gently." Allow 5 minutes for the New Avatar Power to flood to the surface on its own as you relax. |
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"permlink": "new-avatar-power-ritual",
"title": "New Avatar Power Ritual",
"body": "Pretty powerful, first part. \n\nTHE NEW AVATAR POWER RITUAL\n\n\n\nQuietly read the following words aloud, listening to what you are saying. Read slowly and carefully, pausing between sentences, and stopping for about three seconds wherever you find three periods (...) in the text. It should take you a full four minutes to read the words aloud from beginning to end. You may record this on your computer and play it back for yourself instead of reading it each time. The point is to completely relax and feel good for a few minutes.\n\n\"I am beginning the New Avatar Power Ritual. I call on the Inner Planes to witness. I state my purpose thus: ANKAR YOD HAY VAW HAY.\n\nI begin to wind down, to let go and be rid of all the tensions of my body. To let my muscles relax, unwind and let go.\n\nThe tensions are beginning to drain from my body. Soon, a gradual heaviness will start to weigh down my thighs, my arms, my hands, my feet, my legs, my body.\n\nMy muscles unwind and let go. All my muscles are relaxing, unwinding, and relaxing.\n\nVery soon I shall feel the winding, the letting go. Unwinding and letting go. Unwinding, letting go. Unwinding. Letting Go.\n\nDeeper and deeper...letting go...unwinding and letting go.\n\nThe tensions drain from my muscles and they will soon become loose, letting go, relaxing and unwinding.\n\nBreathing easily and deeply. Easily and deeply.\n\nUnwinding and letting go...drifting into the peace and serenity of complete relaxation. And as my body unwinds and relaxes so I enter the peace and quiet, where only these words have meaning, and nothing else disturbs me.\n\nLetting go..unwinding...letting go...unwinding...relax...relax...relax...let go...let go...let go...relax...relax...relax...let go...let go...let go.\n\nI call on Thee, Mighty Arzel, who stands in the East, to assist me this and all my ventures. I know now that New Avatar Power is flooding to the surface. I now close my eyes gently.\"\n\nAllow 5 minutes for the New Avatar Power to flood to the surface on its own as you relax.",
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}swordpenpublished a new post: if-you-keep-reading2018/02/19 06:56:57
swordpenpublished a new post: if-you-keep-reading
2018/02/19 06:56:57
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | poetry |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | if-you-keep-reading |
| title | If You Keep Reading |
| body | @@ -119,11 +119,13 @@ le n -ude +ekkid gir |
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"body": "@@ -119,11 +119,13 @@\n le n\n-ude\n+ekkid\n gir\n",
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}swordpenpublished a new post: if-you-keep-reading2018/02/19 06:55:51
swordpenpublished a new post: if-you-keep-reading
2018/02/19 06:55:51
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | poetry |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | if-you-keep-reading |
| title | If You Keep Reading |
| body | If you keep reading at the end of this post you might see a big pair of tits that you can upvote or maybe even the whole nude girl combined with some willowy, flowery prose, to make it seem more artsy so that you can upvote art not ass so everything will be like it should so the machine will keep working. |
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"body": "If you keep reading\nat the end of this post you might see\na big pair of tits\nthat you can upvote\nor maybe even\nthe whole nude girl\ncombined with some willowy, flowery prose,\nto make it seem more artsy\nso that you can upvote art not ass\nso everything will be like it should\nso the machine will keep working.",
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}2018/02/19 06:36:33
2018/02/19 06:36:33
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | poetry |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | phantoms |
| title | Phantoms |
| body | Why are you staring at your lcd/led screen on a good night or day somewhere on the only planet we know that can even keep things like us alive when you could be f**cking or eating and drinking. Something real, something valuable, stop chasing ghost stop wasting time. |
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"body": "Why are you staring \nat your lcd/led screen\non a good night or day\nsomewhere on the only planet we know\nthat can even keep things like us alive\nwhen you could be f**cking\nor eating and drinking.\nSomething real,\nsomething valuable,\nstop chasing ghost\nstop wasting time.",
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}2018/02/19 06:19:48
2018/02/19 06:19:48
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}2018/02/19 06:12:03
2018/02/19 06:12:03
| parent author | haejin |
| parent permlink | cardano-ada-very-three-wavish |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-haejin-cardano-ada-very-three-wavish-20180219t061159957z |
| title | |
| body | wow... don't know what is going on in the comments here! I am very hopeful about cardano, I am holding until the cows come home or whatever sappy sweet colloquialism you like! I believe in this project and it is a long term , 3 to 5 year at least , hold for me. So, I try not to get too excited, or worried, about cardano week for week. In three years I believe this will be a top three crypto, having replaced Litecoin. |
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"title": "",
"body": "wow... don't know what is going on in the comments here! I am very hopeful about cardano, I am holding until the cows come home or whatever sappy sweet colloquialism you like! I believe in this project and it is a long term , 3 to 5 year at least , hold for me. So, I try not to get too excited, or worried, about cardano week for week. In three years I believe this will be a top three crypto, having replaced Litecoin.",
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}mr4upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / re-mr4-secrets-of-dark-web-20180130t012206890z2018/02/17 16:32:09
mr4upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / re-mr4-secrets-of-dark-web-20180130t012206890z
2018/02/17 16:32:09
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}swordpenreceived 0.005 SP curation reward for @jamilfian / re-donkeypong-werewolves-have-been-shifting-their-shapes-for-a-long-time-20180210t074027733z2018/02/17 07:40:24
swordpenreceived 0.005 SP curation reward for @jamilfian / re-donkeypong-werewolves-have-been-shifting-their-shapes-for-a-long-time-20180210t074027733z
2018/02/17 07:40:24
| curator | swordpen |
| reward | 8.177249 VESTS |
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}2018/02/10 08:54:15
2018/02/10 08:54:15
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| permlink | re-fatkat-dennis-kucinich-filing-petition-to-run-for-ohio-governor-as-democratic-candidate-20180210t085414976z |
| title | |
| body | I love this guy! He was brave enough to say he witnessed a u.f.o. without fear of being dismissed or called a kook |
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}2018/02/10 08:52:09
2018/02/10 08:52:09
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}2018/02/10 08:51:36
2018/02/10 08:51:36
| parent author | donkeypong |
| parent permlink | werewolves-have-been-shifting-their-shapes-for-a-long-time |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-donkeypong-werewolves-have-been-shifting-their-shapes-for-a-long-time-20180210t085135803z |
| title | |
| body | This is cool, I find the Navajo idea of skinwalkers, or "yeenadlooshi" really fascinating and kind of like werewolves,only the moon does not affect them. |
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"body": "This is cool, I find the Navajo idea of skinwalkers, or \"yeenadlooshi\" really fascinating and kind of like werewolves,only the moon does not affect them.",
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}ilianilievupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 15:53:21
ilianilievupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 15:53:21
| voter | ilianiliev |
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}sensationupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 05:53:12
sensationupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 05:53:12
| voter | sensation |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest |
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}muhammad17upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 05:20:51
muhammad17upvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 05:20:51
| voter | muhammad17 |
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}swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 05:20:30
swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 05:20:30
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}freetimeupvoted (3.10%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 05:20:12
freetimeupvoted (3.10%) @swordpen / i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 05:20:12
| voter | freetime |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest2018/02/09 05:20:06
swordpenpublished a new post: i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest
2018/02/09 05:20:06
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | jerrybanfield |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest |
| title | I Felt Her Fingers, Supernatural Writing Contest |
| body | Hi Steemit! When I came across this contest, I knew I had stories to share, the only problem at first was deciding which story to share! You see, I grew up in an old farmhouse in Alabama that had been used as a hospital for Confederate Soldiers during the Civil War, so it had seen it's fair share of death and horrors. I have read a theory that wooden houses act as sort of "psychic batteries", that is to say that wood can somehow store emotions of those who have lived there, especially strong emotions, and later, the right emotions can be like a psychic "trigger", triggering the house to play back a scene from the past, like some kind of existential dvd ! That is one of the many explanations I have read for the existence of ghosts. The House (from the side) <img src="https://image.ibb.co/ejhCix/136.jpg" alt="136" border="0" /> I will be the first to say that I have no idea what ghosts actually are, although I have experienced encounters with them many times in my life, mostly in my childhood in that house. The one encounter that stands out, and the one that I will tell you about today, involved not only me but my older brother as well, and it is the encounter that, to this very day, there exists no good "rational" explanation. The room my older brother and I shared in the house had been the surgery room, so, needless to say, many people had died in that room. The room was very large, with twelve foot ceilings, and a door that opened onto a screen porch, that very oddly, would never stay locked! No matter how many times at night you checked to make sure that door was locked when you went to bed, it was always unlocked in the morning. Also, the screen porch it was attached to has its own haunting story: The Porch: <img src="https://image.ibb.co/krrAkc/140.jpg" alt="140" border="0" /> According to the lore, a confederate soldier had his leg blown off by a cannonball and replaced with a wooden leg, he died shortly after from infection. Sometimes, you can hear him walking up and down the porch, thumping his wooden leg against the floor and dragging his good leg along. It sounds like this: thump (loud) and draaagggg, (slowly). Everyone who has stayed in the house for at least two nights has heard it. My nephew affectionately calls the ghost "Old Thump". We have checked,and there is just no way that trees are causing the sounds, so that remains a mystery. But that is not the story I want to tell. The story I wish to tell involves the bedroom my brother and I shared, the surgery room. Once, when I was eleven years old, I was startled awake, FULLY awake, to discover a large black lady standing over my bed. The room was dark, completely, pitch black dark, and the woman's skin was very, very black, but I could SEE HER against the darkness of the room! Indeed, I could make out every single detail of her clothes and her face! She was large, both tall and overweight, and wearing what appeared to be a blue skirt made out of some kind of rough denim-like material, with a button-up white shirt and a red scarf tied around her head. It was like she had a light inside of her, the woman was GLOWING! And her eyes... they were so large and white against the dark room. I cannot stress this part enough, even though the room was totally dark, the woman herself was glowing as if she had a lightbulb inside of her. Now, even though I felt no malice from this woman, I was still terrified! Put yourself in my place, eleven year old child is startled awake from a deep sleep, and awakens to seeing a woman who clearly should not be there standing over his bed! More than that, a glowing woman, clearly not natural... I could not move. Then, it got even stranger! I had kicked the covers off of me during the night, and the woman bent down and pulled them up over me, then smoothed them out with her hand, and I COULD FEEL HER HAND AND FINGERS THROUGH THE COVERS!!! To me, this is the one feature of the encounter that convinces me that it was not a sleep paralysis episode. Sleep paralysis, which I suffered from as a child, often involves waking up in a state of total paralysis to "see" things in the room, hallucinations. When the hallucinations pass, the sufferer can then move, breathe etc. In this experience, the fear paralyzed me, true, but I felt very vividly the woman's hands, and in sleep paralysis you feel nothing, because it is only visual and auditory hallucinations. I cannot stress enough how I felt this woman's fingers and hands through the covers, I could even see the cracks on her hands and palms, and the length of her fingernails! After "tucking me in", the woman stood up and vanished, but it was long before I got back to sleep! I kept this occurrence completely to myself, I thought my family would tease me if I told them about it, but a few weeks later at breakfast, when it was just my older brother and I in the room, he went on to say: "You know, I had the strangest thing happen to me a few weeks ago!" and he went on to describe what had happened to him, down to the woman bending over and pulling the covers back over him, exactly as it had happened to me! The one difference, though, was that he could not see the woman's face! Where I had seen her face very vividly, he saw only a blur! Otherwise it was completely the same though, and he described how she glowed, like she had swallowed a lightbulb! I have thought a lot about this since, and the conclusion that I have come to is that my brother and I engaged the right "psychic trigger" for the old wooden hospital house to replay a scene. I was eleven at the time, and he was twenty-three. Both of us were ages that soldiers in the Civil War would have been, as during that inhumane conflict boys as young as nine, and men as old as fifty fought. We were sleeping in the room that had been the surgery room, two young men, in beds across the room from each other, and to make the picture complete, there was actually a bedpan ( over a hundred years old and unused) under his bed, because there was nowhere else to put it. The woman was a nurse, and she was doing her duty, caring for the wounded soldiers. I like to believe that she was not actually there in ghost or spirit form, I like to believe that she had long since moved on to whatever lies beyond, and the figure that so lovingly pulled the covers up over me was just a hologram the old wooden house was replaying because two young men were spending the night in the cold former surgery room. The woman, whoever she was, had undoubtedly been a slave, and maybe even had resided here : <img src="https://image.ibb.co/niZgvc/181.jpg" alt="181" border="0"> the only old slave quarter still standing on the property. The woman surely suffered in life, she undoubtedly suffered the utter indignities that those who were forced to call another human being "master" were forced to suffer, maybe she had children ripped away from her and sold to others, there is no end to the potential horrors this woman may have faced. Yet, she pulled the covers up over a freezing little white boy one night. Two hundred and fifty years after her labors had ended, a part of her remained in that house and pulled those covers up, and when I looked into her eyes, I did not see hatred, or malice, which would have been justified given the life she must have been forced to endure. I saw compassion, and pity, compassion for what would have been a human being who had been fighting on the side that was trying to keep her a slave. I saw compassion. My older brother could not see those eyes, he only saw a blurred face. I have often thought about that and what it means, that a boy of eleven saw her face and a man of twenty-three could not. The love for children is universal I believe, even children that are misguided into carrying guns and calling themselves your enemy. Even children as lost as that, there is still love. I will never forget that face. I hope dearly that the soul, or spirit, the ESSENCE of that woman was gone long before then, gone to attain a happiness after death that she was denied in life. I hope that the "ghost" who pulled the covers up to my chin was not really there, was just a hologram. But I felt her fingers. So help me god, I felt her fingers. |
| json metadata | {"tags":["jerrybanfield","life","story","spirituality","writing"],"image":["https://image.ibb.co/ejhCix/136.jpg","https://image.ibb.co/krrAkc/140.jpg","https://image.ibb.co/niZgvc/181.jpg"],"app":"steemit/0.1","format":"markdown"} |
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"permlink": "i-felt-her-fingers-supernatural-writing-contest",
"title": "I Felt Her Fingers, Supernatural Writing Contest",
"body": "Hi Steemit!\n\n \nWhen I came across this contest, I knew I had stories to share, the only problem at first was deciding which story to share! You see, I grew up in an old farmhouse in Alabama that had been used as a hospital for Confederate Soldiers during the Civil War, so it had seen it's fair share of death and horrors. I have read a theory that wooden houses act as sort of \"psychic batteries\", that is to say that wood can somehow store emotions of those who have lived there, especially strong emotions, and later, the right emotions can be like a psychic \"trigger\", triggering the house to play back a scene from the past, like some kind of existential dvd ! That is one of the many explanations I have read for the existence of ghosts.\n\nThe House (from the side) <img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/ejhCix/136.jpg\" alt=\"136\" border=\"0\" /> \n\nI will be the first to say that I have no idea what ghosts actually are, although I have experienced encounters with them many times in my life, mostly in my childhood in that house. The one encounter that stands out, and the one that I will tell you about today, involved not only me but my older brother as well, and it is the encounter that, to this very day, there exists no good \"rational\" explanation.\n\nThe room my older brother and I shared in the house had been the surgery room, so, needless to say, many people had died in that room. The room was very large, with twelve foot ceilings, and a door that opened onto a screen porch, that very oddly, would never stay locked! No matter how many times at night you checked to make sure that door was locked when you went to bed, it was always unlocked in the morning. Also, the screen porch it was attached to has its own haunting story:\n\nThe Porch: <img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/krrAkc/140.jpg\" alt=\"140\" border=\"0\" /> \n\nAccording to the lore, a confederate soldier had his leg blown off by a cannonball and replaced with a wooden leg, he died shortly after from infection. Sometimes, you can hear him walking up and down the porch, thumping his wooden leg against the floor and dragging his good leg along. It sounds like this: thump (loud) and draaagggg, (slowly). Everyone who has stayed in the house for at least two nights has heard it. My nephew affectionately calls the ghost \"Old Thump\". We have checked,and there is just no way that trees are causing the sounds, so that remains a mystery.\n\nBut that is not the story I want to tell. The story I wish to tell involves the bedroom my brother and I shared, the surgery room. \n\nOnce, when I was eleven years old, I was startled awake, FULLY awake, to discover a large black lady standing over my bed. The room was dark, completely, pitch black dark, and the woman's skin was very, very black, but I could SEE HER against the darkness of the room! Indeed, I could make out every single detail of her clothes and her face! She was large, both tall and overweight, and wearing what appeared to be a blue skirt made out of some kind of rough denim-like material, with a button-up white shirt and a red scarf tied around her head. It was like she had a light inside of her, the woman was GLOWING! And her eyes... they were so large and white against the dark room.\n\nI cannot stress this part enough, even though the room was totally dark, the woman herself was glowing as if she had a lightbulb inside of her.\n\nNow, even though I felt no malice from this woman, I was still terrified! Put yourself in my place, eleven year old child is startled awake from a deep sleep, and awakens to seeing a woman who clearly should not be there standing over his bed! More than that, a glowing woman, clearly not natural... I could not move.\n\nThen, it got even stranger! I had kicked the covers off of me during the night, and the woman bent down and pulled them up over me, then smoothed them out with her hand, and I COULD FEEL HER HAND AND FINGERS THROUGH THE COVERS!!! To me, this is the one feature of the encounter that convinces me that it was not a sleep paralysis episode. Sleep paralysis, which I suffered from as a child, often involves waking up in a state of total paralysis to \"see\" things in the room, hallucinations. When the hallucinations pass, the sufferer can then move, breathe etc. In this experience, the fear paralyzed me, true, but I felt very vividly the woman's hands, and in sleep paralysis you feel nothing, because it is only visual and auditory hallucinations. I cannot stress enough how I felt this woman's fingers and hands through the covers, I could even see the cracks on her hands and palms, and the length of her fingernails! After \"tucking me in\", the woman stood up and vanished, but it was long before I got back to sleep!\n\nI kept this occurrence completely to myself, I thought my family would tease me if I told them about it, but a few weeks later at breakfast, when it was just my older brother and I in the room, he went on to say: \"You know, I had the strangest thing happen to me a few weeks ago!\" and he went on to describe what had happened to him, down to the woman bending over and pulling the covers back over him, exactly as it had happened to me! The one difference, though, was that he could not see the woman's face! Where I had seen her face very vividly, he saw only a blur! Otherwise it was completely the same though, and he described how she glowed, like she had swallowed a lightbulb!\n\nI have thought a lot about this since, and the conclusion that I have come to is that my brother and I engaged the right \"psychic trigger\" for the old wooden hospital house to replay a scene. I was eleven at the time, and he was twenty-three. Both of us were ages that soldiers in the Civil War would have been, as during that inhumane conflict boys as young as nine, and men as old as fifty fought. We were sleeping in the room that had been the surgery room, two young men, in beds across the room from each other, and to make the picture complete, there was actually a bedpan ( over a hundred years old and unused) under his bed, because there was nowhere else to put it.\n\nThe woman was a nurse, and she was doing her duty, caring for the wounded soldiers. I like to believe that she was not actually there in ghost or spirit form, I like to believe that she had long since moved on to whatever lies beyond, and the figure that so lovingly pulled the covers up over me was just a hologram the old wooden house was replaying because two young men were spending the night in the cold former surgery room. \n\nThe woman, whoever she was, had undoubtedly been a slave, and maybe even had resided here : <img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/niZgvc/181.jpg\" alt=\"181\" border=\"0\"> \n\n the only old slave quarter still standing on the property. The woman surely suffered in life, she undoubtedly suffered the utter indignities that those who were forced to call another human being \"master\" were forced to suffer, maybe she had children ripped away from her and sold to others, there is no end to the potential horrors this woman may have faced.\n\nYet, she pulled the covers up over a freezing little white boy one night. Two hundred and fifty years after her labors had ended, a part of her remained in that house and pulled those covers up, and when I looked into her eyes, I did not see hatred, or malice, which would have been justified given the life she must have been forced to endure. I saw compassion, and pity, compassion for what would have been a human being who had been fighting on the side that was trying to keep her a slave. I saw compassion.\n\nMy older brother could not see those eyes, he only saw a blurred face. I have often thought about that and what it means, that a boy of eleven saw her face and a man of twenty-three could not. The love for children is universal I believe, even children that are misguided into carrying guns and calling themselves your enemy. Even children as lost as that, there is still love.\n\nI will never forget that face. I hope dearly that the soul, or spirit, the ESSENCE of that woman was gone long before then, gone to attain a happiness after death that she was denied in life. I hope that the \"ghost\" who pulled the covers up to my chin was not really there, was just a hologram.\n\nBut I felt her fingers.\n\nSo help me god, I felt her fingers.",
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}swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @jerrybanfield / mr7z0qvr2018/02/05 19:58:42
swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @jerrybanfield / mr7z0qvr
2018/02/05 19:58:42
| voter | swordpen |
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| weight | 10000 (100.00%) |
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}swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / what-s-in-the-lake2018/02/03 21:18:00
swordpenupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / what-s-in-the-lake
2018/02/03 21:18:00
| voter | swordpen |
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}2018/02/03 21:15:51
2018/02/03 21:15:51
| parent author | tokoya |
| parent permlink | re-swordpen-what-s-in-the-lake-20180203t211139970z |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-tokoya-re-swordpen-what-s-in-the-lake-20180203t211551578z |
| title | |
| body | Thank you |
| json metadata | {"tags":["spokenword"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
| Transaction Info | Block #19556493/Trx f73efd547740939da2f81ceb75548abceff7e653 |
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"title": "",
"body": "Thank you",
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}2018/02/03 21:11:39
2018/02/03 21:11:39
| parent author | swordpen |
| parent permlink | what-s-in-the-lake |
| author | tokoya |
| permlink | re-swordpen-what-s-in-the-lake-20180203t211139970z |
| title | |
| body | Very inspiring what a great artist |
| json metadata | {"tags":["spokenword"],"app":"steemit/0.1"} |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: what-s-in-the-lake2018/02/03 21:10:51
swordpenpublished a new post: what-s-in-the-lake
2018/02/03 21:10:51
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | spokenword |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | what-s-in-the-lake |
| title | What's In The Lake? |
| body | short audio spoken word featuring Music From An Underground Circus. What's in the Lake in Slothville? <iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/394046010&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe> |
| json metadata | {"tags":["spokenword","music","story","writing","art"],"app":"steemit/0.1","format":"markdown"} |
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"title": "What's In The Lake?",
"body": "short audio spoken word featuring Music From An Underground Circus. What's in the Lake in Slothville?\n\n<iframe width=\"100%\" height=\"300\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" allow=\"autoplay\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/394046010&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true\"></iframe>",
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}swordpenreceived 0.001 SP curation reward for @ambmicheal / re-swordpen-re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180123t051439866z2018/01/30 05:14:48
swordpenreceived 0.001 SP curation reward for @ambmicheal / re-swordpen-re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180123t051439866z
2018/01/30 05:14:48
| curator | swordpen |
| reward | 2.046219 VESTS |
| comment author | ambmicheal |
| comment permlink | re-swordpen-re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180123t051439866z |
| Transaction Info | Block #19422334/Virtual Operation #7 |
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}2018/01/30 01:22:06
2018/01/30 01:22:06
| parent author | mr4 |
| parent permlink | secrets-of-dark-web |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-mr4-secrets-of-dark-web-20180130t012206890z |
| title | |
| body | Just guessing, but I think the game you mean is "Sad Satan"?? It was a hoax/project that sort of made a splash in 2015. I wouldn't look for it. It is full of malware and horrific images bundled in it. Total garbage. The "deep web" is not all bad though. It is the internet in the most free sense. It just sucks that evil people will bring their evil with them |
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"body": "Just guessing, but I think the game you mean is \"Sad Satan\"?? It was a hoax/project that sort of made a splash in 2015. I wouldn't look for it. It is full of malware and horrific images bundled in it. Total garbage.\nThe \"deep web\" is not all bad though. It is the internet in the most free sense. It just sucks that evil people will bring their evil with them",
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}swordpenreceived 0.078 SBD, 0.016 SP author reward for @swordpen / you-another-story-about-who-you-might-be-or-any-of-us2018/01/29 17:20:48
swordpenreceived 0.078 SBD, 0.016 SP author reward for @swordpen / you-another-story-about-who-you-might-be-or-any-of-us
2018/01/29 17:20:48
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | you-another-story-about-who-you-might-be-or-any-of-us |
| sbd payout | 0.078 SBD |
| steem payout | 0.000 STEEM |
| vesting payout | 26.601520 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #19408069/Virtual Operation #3 |
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}swordpenreceived 0.060 SBD, 0.013 SP author reward for @swordpen / re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180122t072428303z2018/01/29 07:24:27
swordpenreceived 0.060 SBD, 0.013 SP author reward for @swordpen / re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180122t072428303z
2018/01/29 07:24:27
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-ambmicheal-the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-game-review-20180122t072428303z |
| sbd payout | 0.060 SBD |
| steem payout | 0.000 STEEM |
| vesting payout | 20.463138 VESTS |
| Transaction Info | Block #19396146/Virtual Operation #32 |
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2018/01/29 05:53:36
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| parent permlink | are-video-games-an-art-looking-at-the-witcher-s-journey |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | re-hansikhouse-are-video-games-an-art-looking-at-the-witcher-s-journey-20180129t055338258z |
| title | |
| body | Then President Obama was given a copy of the Witcher 2 when it was only a pc game on a trip to Poland by Polands prime minister. The Witcher games , in my opinion, do qualify as art. They are emotionally moving,and you remember them long after playing them. They certainly have redeeming social value, the Supreme Courts definition for "art." Personally, playing the Witcher 3 helped me through some bad times. I cannot wait for the Netflix series! |
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"body": "Then President Obama was given a copy of the Witcher 2 when it was only a pc game on a trip to Poland by Polands prime minister. The Witcher games , in my opinion, do qualify as art. They are emotionally moving,and you remember them long after playing them. They certainly have redeeming social value, the Supreme Courts definition for \"art.\" Personally, playing the Witcher 3 helped me through some bad times. I cannot wait for the Netflix series!",
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}swordpenreceived 0.054 SBD, 0.011 SP author reward for @swordpen / re-chops316-hometown-tales-funny-stories-of-billy-the-pig-farmer-20180122t012052504z2018/01/29 01:20:51
swordpenreceived 0.054 SBD, 0.011 SP author reward for @swordpen / re-chops316-hometown-tales-funny-stories-of-billy-the-pig-farmer-20180122t012052504z
2018/01/29 01:20:51
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swordpenreceived 0.030 SBD, 0.008 SP author reward for @swordpen / the-lesser-banishing-ritual-of-the-pentagram-it-s-history-applications-and-potential-for-your-life
2018/01/28 23:33:30
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}2018/01/26 05:59:39
2018/01/26 05:59:39
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| author | fatkat |
| permlink | re-swordpen-re-fatkat-cia-s-project-stargate-and-remote-viewing-20180126t055928103z |
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| body | Cash rules everything around me. I wonder what all the information of humanity would reveal if not hidden behind paywalls and classification. |
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}2018/01/24 20:59:03
2018/01/24 20:59:03
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}swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma2018/01/23 21:11:30
swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma
2018/01/23 21:11:30
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | life |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | living-with-sarcoma |
| title | Living With Sarcoma. |
| body | @@ -6789,12 +6789,206 @@ without her. +%0A%0AIf anyone out there is living with sarcoma, or caring for a loved one with sarcoma, I can share links or addresses to charities and diets if needed. Or, let me know if you need to talk or vent |
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"body": "@@ -6789,12 +6789,206 @@\n without her.\n+%0A%0AIf anyone out there is living with sarcoma, or caring for a loved one with sarcoma, I can share links or addresses to charities and diets if needed. Or, let me know if you need to talk or vent\n",
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}swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma2018/01/23 21:05:45
swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma
2018/01/23 21:05:45
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | life |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | living-with-sarcoma |
| title | Living With Sarcoma. |
| body | @@ -2887,17 +2887,16 @@ ds shake - , a lot. @@ -2961,17 +2961,16 @@ n artist -s who is |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma2018/01/23 21:04:45
swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma
2018/01/23 21:04:45
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | life |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | living-with-sarcoma |
| title | Living With Sarcoma. |
| body | @@ -1136,23 +1136,22 @@ of age, -you are +she is diagnos @@ -1212,16 +1212,15 @@ old -you were +she was jus |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma2018/01/23 21:03:42
swordpenpublished a new post: living-with-sarcoma
2018/01/23 21:03:42
| parent author | |
| parent permlink | life |
| author | swordpen |
| permlink | living-with-sarcoma |
| title | Living With Sarcoma. |
| body | Four years ago, the love of my life was diagnosed with uterine leiomyosarcoma (ulms). This is an EXTREMELY rare soft muscle cancer, and very aggressive, with a poor prognosis. To give you some idea of how rare it is, only 0.7 percent of malignancies are soft tissue sarcomas. Of those, only 5 to 10 percent of those are leiomyosarcomas, and a smaller number still is uterine leiomysarcomas. <img src="https://image.ibb.co/iyccUG/health_beauty_rare_disease_ribbon_campaigns_medical_campaign_medical_scientist_raising_money_mban3159_low.jpg" alt="health_beauty_rare_disease_ribbon_campaigns_medical_campaign_medical_scientist_raising_money_mban3159_low" border="0"> The outlook for anyone with ulms is bleak. There is only a 50 percent chance of making it 5 years past diagnoses, according to those awful freaking statistics. We are at year four. Did I say this was rare? That's why, when after my girlfriend had to have a complete hysterectomy for tumors in her uterine, we were told the chances of a malignancy, especially in a young woman, are so unlikely. You spend days hoping they are right. Then, the news comes. At 34 years of age, you are diagnosed with this incredibly rare, deadly cancer. You are told you were just "dealt a bad hand". How do you process that? You try to hold it together. It is your responsibility to be strong. It is your responsibility to help the woman you love more than your own life through this, you are not going to cry in front of her. On the inside , more than anything, you feel anger. You are enraged that the universe would do this to this good person. She has suffered with bi-polar condition for a good part of her life, and now this rare cancer? You want to meet god and beat the crap out of him. You both are given the news when she is relearning to walk after the hysterectomy. Chemotherapy must start immediately. Two weeks after having all of her reproductive organs removed, she sits having poison pumped into her veins to kill malignant microscopic cells. And hope it buys time. Time suddenly becomes the most important thing imaginable. You stop thinking entirely of the future. Planning for old age suddenly seems preposterous. Neither of you will make it to old age. Finding small things to do, to bring happiness, that you can afford, become the Holy Grail. You spend as much time together as possible. You never want to be apart. You spend every minute that you are able researching charities. In the USA, cancer is expensive. Rare cancer is that much more expensive. You both go deep into debt, from which you will probably never recover, and you cannot help it. You stop answering the phone when bill collectors call. Her hair falls out. The American Cancer Society is a lifesaver in this regard. They provide, free of charge, two beautiful wigs. They almost look like real hair. They do wonders for her morale. Her hands shake , a lot. The chemo drugs used can cause nerve damage, and she is an artists who is afraid she will never be able to use her hands again. At first, she did not want to have the chemo for this reason. You convinced her to do it, and you watch her hands shake with dread, while trying to convince her it is only temporary. There are small comforts. You have discovered juicing. She drinks 2 large glasses a day of green juice, and one tall glass of carrot juice a day. Made from organic vegetables. This is important. You have also discovered glutamine powder. It helps cells damaged from chemo to heal. It is very, very important. She has to take shots in the stomach for nausea. They suck, but it works. The juicing also helps. Miraculously, the vomiting after chemo is almost non existent. It's hard for you, because you yourself are disabled ,and suffer chronic pain from multiple injuries. You keep quiet about your own problems, but she knows you are hurting. You make a habit of being a bad liar, and telling her you are fine. You learn that the two of you have to fight for her health. Doctors do not know everything, especially about rare diseases, but they always think they do. Her doctor insist that she take estrogen, to help with the menopause brought on the hysterectomy. You research and discover that ULMS tumors can be prone to react to estrogen, that it can make them grow. The doctor says otherwise. She refuses to take the hormone. You have an argument with the doctor. You demand that he test the tumor to see if it has estrogen receptors. Finally, he agrees to. The tumor is loaded with them. This means that , had she taken the doctors orders and continued to take the hormone, more tumors may have grown. The doctor sheepishly says that is "rare", but then agrees that she should not take it. Ct Scans and P.E.T scans every three months are the new norm. Each new test brings crushing anxiety. Life is composed of three month cycles now, to see if the cancer has returned. We have been lucky so far, it has not. Mysterious things happen. Lymph nodes change size, get too big, and have to have needles stuck in them to test for malignancy. Random pains shoot through the body. Symptoms that have no explanation occur frequently. You, (I) are angry at myself, because of all I cannot give her. Before, she was an editor of a medical journal. She had only been there 7 months. Previously she had worked 13 years at a different job. Because she had been at the journal for less than one year before getting cancer, she did not qualify for long term benefits or insurance. Her insurance runs out, and she has to go on disability. None of her family or friends seem to understand the severity of the cancer,a nd say that "she can go back to work when she beats it". You (I) are sorry that you are not a better person that you lived recklessly and foolishly in the past rather than saving money. Now, it has come back to destroy you. Boxes and boxes of bills are stacked in the spare room. The bill collectors threaten lawsuits. They can get very nasty. They tell you you should have planned for something like cancer. They are right, but you hate them still. She has always wanted to see Paris. She knows it is "such an American thing to say" but it is true. Sometimes, she brings it up, and shrugs. "Oh well," she says, and your heart breaks. She has handled this better than anyone you know could handle it. Certainly better than you. She is glad, every day, to be able to go outside when it is warm enough, to be able to sew and knit, and be able to draw. She never talks about dying, and you don't either. you see no point in it. She is your life. She is it. Your parents are dead. Your childhood home is gone. She is your life, and 4 years ago she was told the worst thing anyone could ever be told. Four years ago, you made plans also. You will not live without her. |
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"body": "Four years ago, the love of my life was diagnosed with uterine leiomyosarcoma (ulms). This is an EXTREMELY rare soft muscle cancer, and very aggressive, with a poor prognosis. To give you some idea of how rare it is, only 0.7 percent of malignancies are soft tissue sarcomas. Of those, only 5 to 10 percent of those are leiomyosarcomas, and a smaller number still is uterine leiomysarcomas.\n\n<img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/iyccUG/health_beauty_rare_disease_ribbon_campaigns_medical_campaign_medical_scientist_raising_money_mban3159_low.jpg\" alt=\"health_beauty_rare_disease_ribbon_campaigns_medical_campaign_medical_scientist_raising_money_mban3159_low\" border=\"0\">\n\nThe outlook for anyone with ulms is bleak. There is only a 50 percent chance of making it 5 years past diagnoses, according to those awful freaking statistics. We are at year four.\n\nDid I say this was rare? That's why, when after my girlfriend had to have a complete hysterectomy for tumors in her uterine, we were told the chances of a malignancy, especially in a young woman, are so unlikely. You spend days hoping they are right.\n\nThen, the news comes. At 34 years of age, you are diagnosed with this incredibly rare, deadly cancer. You are told you were just \"dealt a bad hand\". How do you process that?\n\nYou try to hold it together. It is your responsibility to be strong. It is your responsibility to help the woman you love more than your own life through this, you are not going to cry in front of her.\n\nOn the inside , more than anything, you feel anger. You are enraged that the universe would do this to this good person. She has suffered with bi-polar condition for a good part of her life, and now this rare cancer? You want to meet god and beat the crap out of him.\n\nYou both are given the news when she is relearning to walk after the hysterectomy. Chemotherapy must start immediately. Two weeks after having all of her reproductive organs removed, she sits having poison pumped into her veins to kill malignant microscopic cells. And hope it buys time.\n\nTime suddenly becomes the most important thing imaginable. You stop thinking entirely of the future. Planning for old age suddenly seems preposterous. Neither of you will make it to old age. Finding small things to do, to bring happiness, that you can afford, become the Holy Grail. You spend as much time together as possible. You never want to be apart.\n\nYou spend every minute that you are able researching charities. In the USA, cancer is expensive. Rare cancer is that much more expensive. You both go deep into debt, from which you will probably never recover, and you cannot help it. You stop answering the phone when bill collectors call.\n\nHer hair falls out. The American Cancer Society is a lifesaver in this regard. They provide, free of charge, two beautiful wigs. They almost look like real hair. They do wonders for her morale.\n\nHer hands shake , a lot. The chemo drugs used can cause nerve damage, and she is an artists who is afraid she will never be able to use her hands again. At first, she did not want to have the chemo for this reason. You convinced her to do it, and you watch her hands shake with dread, while trying to convince her it is only temporary.\n\nThere are small comforts. You have discovered juicing. She drinks 2 large glasses a day of green juice, and one tall glass of carrot juice a day. Made from organic vegetables. This is important. You have also discovered glutamine powder. It helps cells damaged from chemo to heal. It is very, very important.\n\nShe has to take shots in the stomach for nausea. They suck, but it works. The juicing also helps. Miraculously, the vomiting after chemo is almost non existent.\n\nIt's hard for you, because you yourself are disabled ,and suffer chronic pain from multiple injuries.\n You keep quiet about your own problems, but she knows you are hurting. You make a habit of being a bad liar, and telling her you are fine.\n\nYou learn that the two of you have to fight for her health. Doctors do not know everything, especially about rare diseases, but they always think they do. Her doctor insist that she take estrogen, to help with the menopause brought on the hysterectomy. You research and discover that ULMS tumors can be prone to react to estrogen, that it can make them grow. The doctor says otherwise. She refuses to take the hormone. You have an argument with the doctor. You demand that he test the tumor to see if it has estrogen receptors. Finally, he agrees to. The tumor is loaded with them. This means that , had she taken the doctors orders and continued to take the hormone, more tumors may have grown. The doctor sheepishly says that is \"rare\", but then agrees that she should not take it.\n\nCt Scans and P.E.T scans every three months are the new norm. Each new test brings crushing anxiety. Life is composed of three month cycles now, to see if the cancer has returned. We have been lucky so far, it has not.\n\nMysterious things happen. Lymph nodes change size, get too big, and have to have needles stuck in them to test for malignancy. Random pains shoot through the body. Symptoms that have no explanation occur frequently.\n\nYou, (I) are angry at myself, because of all I cannot give her. Before, she was an editor of a medical journal. She had only been there 7 months. Previously she had worked 13 years at a different job.\n\nBecause she had been at the journal for less than one year before getting cancer, she did not qualify for long term benefits or insurance. Her insurance runs out, and she has to go on disability. None of her family or friends seem to understand the severity of the cancer,a nd say that \"she can go back to work when she beats it\".\n\nYou (I) are sorry that you are not a better person that you lived recklessly and foolishly in the past rather than saving money. Now, it has come back to destroy you. Boxes and boxes of bills are stacked in the spare room. The bill collectors threaten lawsuits. They can get very nasty. They tell you you should have planned for something like cancer. They are right, but you hate them still.\n\nShe has always wanted to see Paris. She knows it is \"such an American thing to say\" but it is true. Sometimes, she brings it up, and shrugs. \"Oh well,\" she says, and your heart breaks.\n\nShe has handled this better than anyone you know could handle it. Certainly better than you. She is glad, every day, to be able to go outside when it is warm enough, to be able to sew and knit, and be able to draw. She never talks about dying, and you don't either. you see no point in it.\n\nShe is your life. She is it. Your parents are dead. Your childhood home is gone. She is your life, and 4 years ago she was told the worst thing anyone could ever be told. Four years ago, you made plans also.\n\nYou will not live without her.",
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}2018/01/23 16:56:51
2018/01/23 16:56:51
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| body | Interesting, are you certain the peroxide doesn't hurt or badly dry out the dogs skin? |
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2018/01/23 16:52:00
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2018/01/23 16:40:21
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}swordpenpublished a new post: tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of2018/01/23 16:34:12
swordpenpublished a new post: tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of
2018/01/23 16:34:12
| parent author | |
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| author | swordpen |
| permlink | tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of |
| title | Tree Fornications. (An environmental poem..sort of.) |
| body | @@ -221,17 +221,17 @@ point. ( -o +O r fucked |
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}swordpenpublished a new post: tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of2018/01/23 16:33:24
swordpenpublished a new post: tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of
2018/01/23 16:33:24
| parent author | |
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| author | swordpen |
| permlink | tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of |
| title | Tree Fornications. (An environmental poem..sort of.) |
| body | Hey Steempeople, This is a little "beat style" (ugh) poem that I have performed live on stage occasionally. Warning their is profanity. It's called "Tree Fornications" because we have, all of us, fucked a tree at some point. (or fucked over , if you prefer) <img src="https://image.ibb.co/cZTNUG/e9864a586eb2356c1fe11ae4e5760acc_tree_carving_tree_sculpture.jpg" alt="e9864a586eb2356c1fe11ae4e5760acc_tree_carving_tree_sculpture" border="0"> See that tree open up like a schoolgirls skirt... You were thinking, wherever you were, that that beer was gonna be warm if we didn't get back to the party soon I find it funny, how, if you were there, you would have taken your clothes off and straddled that tree! I find it most hilarious that I did not. Sure you would have! and if I had been a little more drunk and a little less puritan... Goddamn that would have been a scene! Well, I can just see you now, all naked and dumbly innocent frantically hammering away scattering spiders and aphids, licking bark and caressing leaves and pleading for an EPIPHANY. While the gape-mouthed park rangers stared on in total Saturday afternoon tree fetish bewilderment! Yapping on their radios -tapping their boots together- wondering nervously if they were gonna have to actually touch the crazy humping the tree? And later After the tree permitted you to release your load, And you fell to the grass sobbing dripping what was left all around you, your thighs, your hair, the tree, all gluey And I helped you to your skinned and bleeding feet as I would have done Just one step ahead of the raging park rangers who only like homo-sapien females. You wrecked, genitals ruined, but crying over and over again that WE WERE FORGIVEN!!!!! By a small green tree in a small green park. And on the way to the E.R. we would have thrown out all the empty beer cans and talked about baseball! What a funny story that would have made! Wait... no. Come to think of it... I am wrong. Come to think of it... that wouldn't be funny at all. It's just the booze talking, man. And it's fucking repulsive. Sitting here under this Great Oak. I don't talk no more. Don't matter noways. The bottles dry. My heard hurts too bad. I can't sleep because of them. They don't never stop. Hear them? Turn your car off for a minute and listen to the trees scream. <img src="https://image.ibb.co/it5aib/9405c1e5df1adae0bfeae0df89f9f257.jpg" alt="9405c1e5df1adae0bfeae0df89f9f257" border="0"> |
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"title": "Tree Fornications. (An environmental poem..sort of.)",
"body": "Hey Steempeople,\n\nThis is a little \"beat style\" (ugh) poem that I have performed live on stage occasionally. Warning their is profanity. It's called \"Tree Fornications\" because we have, all of us, fucked a tree at some point. (or fucked over , if you prefer)\n\n<img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/cZTNUG/e9864a586eb2356c1fe11ae4e5760acc_tree_carving_tree_sculpture.jpg\" alt=\"e9864a586eb2356c1fe11ae4e5760acc_tree_carving_tree_sculpture\" border=\"0\">\n\nSee that tree open up like a schoolgirls skirt...\nYou were thinking, wherever you were, that that beer was gonna be warm if we didn't get back to the party soon\nI find it funny, how, if you were there,\nyou would have taken your clothes off and straddled that tree!\nI find it most hilarious that I did not.\nSure you would have! and if I had been a little more drunk and a little less puritan...\nGoddamn that would have been a scene!\nWell, I can just see you now,\nall naked and dumbly innocent\nfrantically hammering away scattering spiders and aphids,\nlicking bark and caressing leaves and pleading for an EPIPHANY.\nWhile the gape-mouthed park rangers stared on in total Saturday afternoon tree fetish bewilderment!\nYapping on their radios -tapping their boots together- wondering nervously if they were gonna have to actually touch the crazy humping the tree?\nAnd later\nAfter the tree permitted you to release your load,\nAnd you fell to the grass sobbing\ndripping what was left all around you, your thighs, your hair, the tree, all gluey\nAnd I helped you to your skinned and bleeding feet as I would have done\nJust one step ahead of the raging park rangers who only like homo-sapien females.\nYou wrecked, genitals ruined, but crying over and over again that WE WERE FORGIVEN!!!!!\nBy a small green tree in a small green park.\nAnd on the way to the E.R. we would have thrown out all the empty beer cans and talked about baseball!\nWhat a funny story that would have made!\nWait... no. Come to think of it... I am wrong.\nCome to think of it... that wouldn't be funny at all.\nIt's just the booze talking, man.\nAnd it's fucking repulsive.\nSitting here under this Great Oak. I don't talk no more.\nDon't matter noways. The bottles dry. My heard hurts too bad.\nI can't sleep because of them. They don't never stop.\nHear them?\nTurn your car off for a minute and listen to the trees scream.\n\n<img src=\"https://image.ibb.co/it5aib/9405c1e5df1adae0bfeae0df89f9f257.jpg\" alt=\"9405c1e5df1adae0bfeae0df89f9f257\" border=\"0\">",
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}jackandcokeupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of2018/01/23 16:32:51
jackandcokeupvoted (100.00%) @swordpen / tree-fornications-an-environmental-poem-sort-of
2018/01/23 16:32:51
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