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      "permlink": "steemitboard-notify-shayman-20190320t174629000z",
      "title": "",
      "body": "Congratulations @shayman! You received a personal award!\n\n<table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@shayman/birthday1.png</td><td>Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 1 year!</td></tr></table>\n\n<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@shayman) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](http://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=shayman)_</sub>\n\n\n**Do not miss the last post from @steemitboard:**\n<table><tr><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/carnival/@steemitboard/carnival-challenge-here-are-the-winners\"><img src=\"https://steemitimages.com/64x128/http://i.cubeupload.com/rltzHT.png\"></a></td><td><a href=\"https://steemit.com/carnival/@steemitboard/carnival-challenge-here-are-the-winners\">Carnival Challenge - Here are the winners</a></td></tr></table>\n\n###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes!",
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      "body": "here was once a boy called Jagan whose dream was to become a famous cricket player. The boy would pray every day for his dream to come true; but Jagan was not a lazy boy so he would also practice at the club, he would run, exercise and eat well, and he would always finish his homework so that there was time to play cricket with his friends at the end of each day.\n\nOne day, Jagan was told by his father that they were leaving their home and travelling to a faraway country called Britain. The boy was very nervous but he knew that his father was doing what was best for the family. So Jagan helped his father pack their belongings and prepare for the long journey. He also helped his mother tidy the house and he looked after his sister whenever he was asked.\n\nWhen the family finally arrived in London, young Jagan felt out of place and alone. But he was determined to make the most of his new life and so he found a club where he could play cricket and he continued to follow his dream.\n\nHe always practiced and he always exercised, and when he was enrolled at the local school he made sure that he completed his homework on time so that he was able to play cricket at the end of each day. Jagan was as determined as ever, and he was convinced that one day his dream would come true.\n\nThe new school was fun. The young boy soon made lots of new friends and the time passed quickly. But Jagan’s friends did not understand why he was so interested in cricket.\n\n‘It is a waste of your time,’ said one.\n\n‘Why do you spend all that energy on a silly dream that will never come true?’ asked another.\n\nAt first, Jagan was able to answer these questions easily. He knew what he wanted and he knew what he had to do to get it. But as time passed, the questions became harder and harder to answer. Jagan’s friends always seemed to be going out and having fun and talking to girls when all he did was work.\n\nOne day, a friend said, ‘Why don’t you forget your silly dream and come to the cinema with us.’\n\nJagan did want to see the film, and he was tired of always working when everybody else seemed to be having more fun than him. And so he missed his cricket training at the club, and missed it again the next night, and again the next. And soon Jagan forgot all about his dream of becoming a cricket player.\n\nThe boy would often lie to his parents about going to the cricket club when really he was hanging around with his friends getting into trouble.\n\nJagan grew older and got into more and more trouble with his friends. He even stole things from the local shop and became very lazy and was never enthusiastic about his life like he was before. Not only did he stop practicing his cricket skills, but he also lost interest in school and never completed his homework. All he did was hang around with his friends.\n\nSchool soon came to an end, and it was then that Jagan realised what a mistake he had made. He had done poorly in his examines and was not able to go to college like many of the others. And when he tried to get a job nobody would give him work because he had no qualifications. Jagan became a bad boy who did many things that he later regretted. He wasted his time and his energy and he had no dream to keep him going.\n\nOne day, Jagan’s father spoke to him. ‘I remember when you had a dream,’ he told his son. ‘You were so determined and so driven, and you prayed and worked hard and were a good son.’\n\nThe boy’s father looked very sad as he lowered his head into his hands. ‘What has become of you now, my son? You are in trouble, you do not work, and you lie to your mother and me about where you spend all of your time.’\n\nJagan’s father talked for a long time and Jagan was so moved by his father’s words that he made a promise to himself that he would change his life and make his parent’s proud once more.\n\nThe next day, jagan ate his breakfast early and walked to his old cricket club. He asked the coach if he could train once more and the friendly man agreed to let the boy return as long as he worked hard and was dedicated to his sport.\n\nAnd so Jagan began his training just as he had done before: he ran and exercised, he ate well, he went to bed early and woke up early, and he prayed that his hard work would one day be rewarded.\n\nBut Jagan also realised that the hard work was its own reward. He turned his back on the friends that did him no good, and he turned his back on his life of bad deeds and trouble. Instead, Jagan embraced his dream of becoming a cricket player once more.\n\nMany years later, Jagan did indeed become a famous cricket player. And when a young boy ran up to him after a match and asked how he did it, jagan said that it all started with a dream. ‘You must always have a dream,’ he said once more with a smile.",
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      "body": "There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn to not judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.\n\nThe first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.\n\nWhen they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.\n\nThe first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted.\n\nThe second son said no – it was covered with green buds and full of promise.\n\nThe third son disagreed, he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.\n\nThe last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfilment.\nThe man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but one season in the tree’s life.\n\nHe told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are – and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life – can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.\n\nIf you give up when it’s winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfilment of your fall.\n\nDon’t judge a life by one difficult season. Don’t let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttp://www.kindspring.org/story/view.php?sid=6528",
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      "body": "The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know.\n\nI stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me\nwith a smile that lit up her entire being.\n\nShe said, “Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?”\n\nI laughed and enthusiastically responded, “Of course you may!” and she gave me a giant squeeze.\n\n“Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?” I asked.\n\nShe jokingly replied, “I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids…”\n\n“No seriously,” I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.\n“I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!” she told me.\n\nAfter class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months, we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this “time machine” as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.\n\nOver the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.\n\nAt the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us. She was\nintroduced and stepped up to the podium.\n\nAs she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell\nyou what I know.”\n\nAs we laughed she cleared her throat and began, “We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day.\n\nYou’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.\nWe have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.\n\nIf you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.\n\nIf I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.\n\nAnybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change.\nHave no regrets.\nThe elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those\nwith regrets.”\n\nShe concluded her speech by courageously singing “The Rose.”\n\nShe challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.\n\nAt the year’s end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.\n\nOver two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it’s\nnever too late to be all you can possibly be .When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they’ll really enjoy it!",
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      "body": "https://i.imgur.com/ZWJlWKt.jpg\nExclusive 30 days free upvotes to your every new post. No need to send any kinds of steem or sbd its full free service. we have paid service too so please check them too. Active the free upvote service and learn more about it here : http://www.upperwhale.ga",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttps://boardofwisdom.com/togo/Quotes/ShowQuote?msgid=45541",
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      "body": "Vote exchange site https://mysteemup.club",
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      "title": "\"THE STORY OF LIFE\"",
      "body": "Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be (possibly your roommate, neighbor, coworker, longlost friend, lover, or even a complete stranger) but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.\n\nAnd sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart.\n\nEverything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.\n\nThe people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience help to create who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones. If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart. If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.\n\nMake every day count!!! Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you. You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.",
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      "body": "Thanks!",
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      "body": "Hello, nice post, however do you know there is a steemschool on a discord channel waiting to help users become successful on steemit and in real life, its been working for me so far, and with the knowledge i see you have through this post im sure they will love to help you get better. Hope to see you there\n\nhttps://discord.gg/KY6k7VG",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-angry-therapist/201612/3-steps-make-dating-fun-instead-stressful-chore",
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      "permlink": "3-steps-to-make-dating-fun-instead-of-a-stressful-chore",
      "title": "3 Steps To Make Dating Fun (Instead Of A Stressful Chore)",
      "body": "When we're getting ready to go on a date, most of us don’t take the time to think about our mindset. We think about what we’re going to wear, what we’re going to do, and whether or not it will be like the last miserable date—a complete waste of time. We cross our fingers, hoping that we'll impress someone.\n\nBut it’s actually more important to have the right mindset than the right shoes. Even if the person you're going out with isn’t “The One,\" you can still have a great time and learn something about others and yourself.\n\nHere are three steps to take in order to have the right mindset when going on a date.\n\n1. Approach it whole, with the complete, authentic, most honest version of you.\n\n“Honest” is a great word to use as a measuring tool when it comes to dating, and how you feel about the other person and yourself. Ask yourself if you are being honest in the way you’re talking, thinking, and behaving. People often have bad experiences or don’t get who they want because they are too busy trying to be who they think they should be, instead of just being who they really are. This is \"false advertising\" and it will cause you to imprison yourself in inauthenticity. Eventually you will have to show your true self, and the other person may wonder who that is.\n\n2. Turn your dial.\n\n\"Dial\" is a term I use a lot because it provides me with a good, concrete visual for thinking about mindset. It enables me to catch myself when I’m falling down the rabbit hole of old patterns, and then I can see myself turning a dial in my head like a gear, knowing it’s going to change a pattern and raise my growth and potential.\n\nWhen it comes to going out on a date, turn your dial from \"Find the One\" to \"Know Somebody.\" If you go into a date thinking the other person may be \"The One,\" you put too much pressure on yourself, the experience, and that person. And if/when you realize that he or she is not “The One,\" your expectations will be aggressively disappointed.\n\nSo go in without expectations, or at least not ones that are set so high. That way, you create a win-win scenario: If the date is subpar, you protect yourself from disappointment, and if you find that there are sparks and another date, it’s a pleasant surprise.\n\nOne way to get rid of your expectations on dates is to turn your dial to \"Know Somebody.\" That’s it. And leave it there through the entire date. This is not inauthentic, either: You're telling yourself that all you want from the date is to know another person, which is an honest and realistic desire. You want to hear someone’s story and experience the world through their eyes; and they'll get to hear your story and experience the world through yours.\n\nAnd through this experience, both of you, whether you’re attracted to each other or not, will learn something—if you’re open to it. Maybe you have a good time and realize what you don’t want in someone. Maybe you find a friend who will play a huge role in your life. Or maybe you will never see this person again. But with this mindset, it doesn’t matter. It's more about the opportunity to experience a new person, and hopefully learn something about yourself.\narticle continues after advertisement\n\n3. Focus less on your own mental checklist and more on how the other person makes you feel.\n\nMany people get excited about finding a partner who seems to check the boxes of qualities they seek in an ideal partner. But in thinking this way, most people also don’t realize that relationships are about creating new spaces for emotions and experiences, not meeting criteria. And how someone makes you feel, even on a given evening, is a great indicator of their ability to create a space for you to grow. If they are being authentic, you are getting a small taste of what a relationship with this person could feel like. Note that many people present themselves in a way that gives you a picture of what something could look like, not feel like. But that picture can end up being very distorted. Remember, actually feeling what something can be is a lot more convincing.",
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      "title": "27 Questions to Help You Identify Your Passions",
      "body": "What Inspires Passion:\n\n1) Make a list of pleasures. Part of living passionately is acknowledging and celebrating the simple pleasures of life, and just figuring out what they are so you can do more of them. Tip: consult your senses for ideas, such as eating chocolate mousse, playing the piano, getting a massage, spooning with your dog.\n\n2) The original definition of the word adventure was “something about to happen”—as in Advent, which celebrates the birth of Christ. So a sense of adventure is related to a sense of anticipation about life, which is helped along immeasurably if you always give yourself something to look forward to.\n\nName some activities or involvements that you most look forward to doing, that when they come up on your calendar most consistently fill you with excited anticipation? (Or add some that would.) Getting together with a certain friend, a road trip, getting to facilitate a workshop, meeting with your men’s or women’s group, going to your painting class.\n\n3) Wonder and awe are among the active ingredients in living passionately. Name a few things that predictably wow you. Ruins, mountain vistas, the view from the top of skyscrapers, musical and artistic genius, natural history museums, encounters with wildlife.\n\n4) In the book Corner Office, 700 CEO's were asked what qualities they see most often in people who succeed. #1 on their collective lists: passionate curiosity.\n\nWhat are you most passionately curious about, and fascinated by? What do you love to study and research, write about, blog about, investigate and try to understand?\n\n5) A flow state is one in which you’re utterly absorbed and focused in some activity you enjoy, energized, oblivious of time, content even when it’s difficult.\n\nWhich, if any, of your involvements and activities typically make you feel like you’re in a flow state? (And if you can’t think of any, write down when the last time was that you felt like you were in a flow state?\n\n6) Having a feel for what wants to emerge in any given situation—a conversation, a relationship, a career, a life—is a valuable skill in living fully. What do you sense is trying to emerge in your life at this juncture? What’s trying to happen, to come to fruition?\n\n7) Among the most consistent precursors of what are called “spontaneous remissions” from disease, is a profound and affirmative personal change just prior to the remission. It could be a revelatory experience, a reconciliation with a long-despised parent, the radical assumption of responsibility for your own life, a significant confession or admission, allowing a long-buried and essential part of you to finally emerge and be expressed, or the pursuit of a long-denied passion.\n\nName some profound and affirmative personal change you could make (or perhaps should make) that even if it didn’t heal your body, would still have a profound healing effect on your life.\narticle continues after advertisement\n\n8) If you were granted one superpower, what would it be?\n\n9) What is your favorite quality about yourself?\n\n10) What movie(s) have you watched over and over? What’s the theme?\n\n11) What kinds of things do you pray about the most often? Or pray for?\n\n12) Name someone who inspires you with his/her approach to life. What is it you admire most about the way this person lives?\n\n13) If you could choose a mentor, dead or alive, to help guide you back—or forward—to a sense of aliveness, who would it be, and why?\n\nWhat advice would s/he would give you regarding how to find your way to this sense of aliveness and vitality?\n\n14) Name a time in your life when you were unusually bold (by your own standards)?\n\nWhat might boldness look like right now in your life?\n\n15) Name one positive change you’d love to see in your work life?\n\n16) What kinds of scenes in movies most often make you choke up? Dramatic reconciliations, acts of kindness, people sticking up for other people, underdogs triumphing over obstacles.\narticle continues after advertisement\n\n17) What if anything do you have a chip on your shoulder about? (Grudges are forms of passion and energy, potential sources of power and sense of mission, and can motivate us to action.) Being raised with certain disadvantages, not going to college, something your parents suppressed in you, some way you’ve been victimized.\n\n18) What issues or stories in the news predictably fill you with indignity and outrage?\n\n19) The secret of life, the sculptor Henry Moore once said, is “to have a task, something you devote your entire life to, something you bring everything to. And the most important thing is that it must be something you cannot possibly do.”\n\nWhen your passions are hooked up to a larger frame of reference, something bigger than yourself, it can help inspire and motivate you. Name some meta-motivation, some value or vision that much of your work and your passions are geared toward achieving (or that you’d like them to be geared toward achieving). Protecting the environment, helping empower people affected by cancer, inspiring lifelong learning, strengthening communities, creating a more informed public, helping people laugh.\n\n20) Compose a bucket-list. 10 things you’d love to do or experience before you die. Learn how to ski, swim with dolphins, get a tattoo, run a marathon, write a book, forgive someone.\n\n21) Where in your life—in what places, doing what things, with which people—can you say, “I like myself here”?\narticle continues after advertisement\n\n22) You're standing at a crossroads. There's a signpost in front of you with two signs on it, pointing in different directions. Without thinking too much, what's written on each of the signs (a word or short phrase)?\n\n23) The psychologist Arnold Mindell, founder of Process Oriented Psychology, says that symptoms are usually dreams trying to come true. Name some recurring symptom in your body that has your attention. Then give it a voice, let it speak to you and tell you: “My dream is that you would………….:”\n\n24) The novelist Toni Morrison once sat down and wrote all the to-do list items she had to get done in the average day—work and non-work related—which was many pages long. At the end of it, she wrote: “What must I do or I shall die?” She came up with only two items: be a mother to my children, and write! Ask yourself the same question: What must I do or I shall die?\n\n25) What decision you could make today that your future self would thank you for?\n\n26) If you could program a subliminal message onto your own computer, and have it flash at you 500 times a day, what message would you plug in?\n\n27) If you died tomorrow, what would be your biggest regret about what you didn't do in life, or didn't get to do?\n\n(Now take a spin back through your responses to the questions, and look for patterns by circling all recurring themes.)\n\nWhat Defeats Passion:\n\n1) What pleasures/passions/involvements have you let slide or lost touch with over the years that you miss the most?\n\n2) Every culture has a word for vampire, for a creature or force so needy it sucks the life-force out of others. And part of reclaiming your vitality is identifying where in your life you lose it, where it drains out.\n\nName a few of the activities and involvements in your life where your energies tend to drain out, that take vitality from you rather than give it. Socializing out of guilt or obligation, Driving in rush hour traffic when you don’t have to, television, letting yourself be trapped in conversations by talkaholics, digital busywork.\n\n3) Now do the same for beliefs and attitudes that tend to take energy from you rather than give it; that rob you of optimism, faith or joy. In other words, undermining, glass-half-empty self-talk, the kind of stuff you probably wouldn’t put up with if someone else was saying it to you: I’ll never lose weight, there are no decent jobs out there, or decent men/women, I’ll never learn this—I’m hopeless, life is unfair, I’m too old to learn new tricks, I never have enough time, I stink at making money, I’m not good enough.\n\n4) There are essentially two kinds of boredom. One is situational—you’re stuck in the checkout line, in traffic, in the waiting room, in a tedious class. The other is existential: you’re bored with your work, your marriage, your life, even your own company. The French call it ennui, the Germans call it unlust, and scientists call it hyperboredom.\n\nIdentify any aspects of your life that you feel deeply bored with.\n\n5) The remedy for boredom is typically action. But with the deeper kinds of boredom, the remedy is more likely to be insight. That is, if you dig a bit you’re likely to find some thwarted desire or energy that the boredom and restlessness are masking.\n\nTo whatever degree you feel plagued by hyperboredom and inertia, go with your gut and see if you can identify what passion or desire may be underneath it that wants expression.\n\n6) Name a few things that are on the top of your list of things you procrastinate around. (There’s often something compelling about what you procrastinate around, something that has a charge for you.) Making a career change, or a relationship change, going back to school, starting an exercise regimen, doing service work, having a certain conversation with a certain someone.\n\n7) If you could change one thing about your personality, how would you be different?\n\n8) Name a thing or two that your parents tried to suppress in you. Some part of your personality, forbidden behavior, activities that were frowned on.\n\n9) What fear have you struggled your whole life to overcome?\n\n10) Restless Legs Syndrome is characterized by having a hard time resting or sleeping, uncomfortable sensations in the legs that patients typically describe as “creepy” and “crawly,” and the compelling urge to move. In fact, the medical literature says that actually getting up and moving usually offers immediate relief.",
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      "body": "Adolescence typically describes the years between ages 13 and 19 and can be considered the transitional stage from childhood to adulthood. However, the physical and psychological changes that occur in adolescence can start earlier, during the preteen or \"tween\" years (ages 9 through 12). Adolescence can be a time of both disorientation and discovery. This transitional period can bring up issues of independence and self-identity; many adolescents and their peers face tough choices regarding schoolwork, sexuality, drugs, alcohol, and social life. Peer groups, romantic interests, and appearance tend to naturally increase in importance for some time during a teen's journey toward adulthood.",
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      "body": "The Nature of Forgiveness\n\nMost psychologists recommend mustering up genuine compassion for those who have wronged us, and moving on from the past, instead of allowing bitterness and anger toward others eat away at us. Although burying the hatchet usually brings peace to the soul, there may be some exceptions to that advise, such as a case of sexual abuse. Sometimes a victim becomes more empowered when given permission to not forgive.\n\nEqually, and perhaps more important, is learning to acknowledge your missteps and forgive yourself. Self-forgiveness is often the first step toward a more loving and positive relationship with yourself, and therefore with others.",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/magnetic-partners/201803/6-ways-tell-if-you-are-not-in-love-your-partner",
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      "title": "\"6 WAYS TO TELL IF YOU ARE NOT IN LOVE WITH YOUR PARTNER\"",
      "body": "There is nothing more disheartening to a couple and a couple’s therapist than to hear one partner proclaim to love, but not be in love with the other. Sounds like: “Well, I do not want anything bad to happen to you. But I do not feel the way I should feel about you.” How about: “Of course I love you. After all, we have children together.” Or the dreaded: “We can still be friends.” So, when people who are in relationship distress claim to love one another, I tend to take this proclamation to another level; especially if they are producing some serious symptoms. For example, I usually ask something like: “You can love your pet poodle and love playing tennis, but are you in love with one another?” If I suspect that only one person is in love, I will separate the couple for a session and ask this question of each of them in confidence. If only one answers in the affirmative, I know that serious trouble is on the horizon. Why? Because once you fall out of love, it is darn hard to fall back in. It is not impossible, but improbable. And if one or both partners were never in love—à la my stance on physical attraction—I doubt very much if it can be cultivated.\n\nWhile most articles focus on how to tell if your partner is not in love with you, I will address those individuals who are showing signs of not being in love; a subtle difference pointed at the proactive rather than the reactive. I know that some people have feasible excuses for their apathetic or neglectful behavior such as anger, depression, or physical illness. But if their detrimental behavior is chronic, chances are something more sinister has been brewing for some time and will—sooner or later—reveal itself in the relationship.\n\n1. Apathy: Partners who are in love seem to have energy to do things with their counterparts. They want to please them and look for new and exciting adventures to engage them. If you do not want to explore the world with your partner you may not covet their company.\n\n2. Distance: Partners who are in love want to be around their counterparts as much as possible. Most cannot wait to get home from work, or for the weekend to spend time with them. Just going out for a simple bite to eat may be fulfilling. If you are routinely distancing from your mate, you may not be in love.\n\n3. Physical Intimacy: Partners who are in love have sex more often to make love. They enjoy pleasing their partners in the bedroom, not purely to boost their own egos, but to make them feel wanted, desired, and valued. And they look forward to it. They feel pleasure from pleasuring. They are truly interested in what turns their partner on and make efforts to obtain this information. If you do not relish being close to your mate and you are uninterested in making love with them, there may be something very seriously wrong.  \n\n4. Focus: Partners who are in love tend to maintain a focus on their counterparts. They think of them often and may bring them little gifts for no reason other than they want to show them how much they are thought of. They express concern when they think their partners are unhappy and try to address the issue as soon as possible. If your partner is rarely on your mind, you may not be in love.\n\n5. Value: Partners who are in love value their counterparts and are more likely to feel lucky to have found such a person. True or not, they tend to think they have found their soul mates. If you feel that your partner is just another “fish in the sea,” you probably are not in love.       \n\n6. Respect: Partners who are in love respect their counterparts. They admire them and are supportive of their endeavors. Out of respect they are better able to listen, negotiate, and compromise. There are fewer control struggles and more teamwork. If you treat your mate as if they have little to offer, you may not be in love.\n\nLacking in one or more of these areas does not necessarily guarantee that you are not in love. But it may, and if so, you should take it seriously. The authenticity of your relationship may be at stake.",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-power-imagination/201011/quick-tips-sleep",
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      "title": "\"QUICK TIP FOR SLEEP\":",
      "body": "Parents ask me all the time about sleep problems. For example...\"You say that sleep issues are a major concern for kids today. How can parents use imagination to help their children fall asleep quickly and easily?\"\n\nNo matter how old a child is, trouble falling asleep is the most common complaint, followed by trouble staying asleep. 30 to 70 percent of kids have a sleep problem at some point. I'd like to share Sophie's story. You might recognize some of her issues in your child.  \n\nEight-year-old Sophie was exhausted and exasperated. When I met her, Sophie told me exactly what her problem was. She said, \"I can't turn off my brain. Stuff keeps spilling out.\" She drew a picture of her life - dark, rainy, with no love. But when I asked her if she could imagine what her life would be like when she could turn off her brain and sleep easily, she transformed that picture. She imagined a land of Love with the sun shining and flowers growing. She said her crabbiness would be gone and she'd feel really happy and proud of herself.   This simple spark of her imagination was the first step toward change. Then we took the actions to get there.\n\nThe Imagination Tools that worked best for Sophie were...  \n\n(1) The \"Balloon Breath,\" breathing deeply into her tummy to calm herself.   \n\n(2) Imagining a \"Special Place\" to fall asleep. She loved to imagine falling asleep peacefully while floating on a fluffy white cloud or in her favorite vacation place. She was lucky enough to go to Hawaii the year before and loved swinging on the hammock in front of her room.  \n\n(3) Meeting a wise \"Wizard\" who gave her \"Gifts.\" Sophie imagined a Harry Potter type teenage wizard dressed in a cool violet skirt and a hot pink blouse with a gold crown, who gave her magic berries that helped her body relax deeply and fall asleep. And her Wizard's wise advice to her was, \"If you believe you're already sleeping, you'll be asleep in a minute.\"   Of course, that was clearly coming from Sophie herself... which is the point.\n\nYour child has the wisdom and answers inside. All you have to do is choose which of the Nine Tools work best. \n\n*Stories based on The Power of Your Child's Imagination: How to Transform Stress and Anxiety into Joy and Success (Perigee/Penguin).\n\nCharlotte Reznick PhD is a child educational psychologist, an Associate Clinical Professor of Psychology at UCLA, and author of the LA Times bestselling book The Power of Your Child's Imagination: How to Transform Stress and Anxiety into Joy and Success(Perigee/Penguin). In addition to her private practice, she creates therapeutic relaxation CDs for children, teens, and parents, and teaches workshops internationally on the healing power of children's imagination.",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anxiety-zen/201405/22-quick-tips-change-your-anxiety-forever",
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      "title": "22 Quick Tips to Change Your Anxiety Forever",
      "body": "You can read all the anti-anxiety advice in the world, but none of this matters unless you take action. To feel more relaxed, to sleep soundly at night, and to put energy into what matters, you have to stop wasting time on tasks that don't matter.\n\nBy the end of this article, your life could become infinitely more productive and Zen-like. Your part is to commit to 15-60 minutes per day and tackle a few of the following 22 anxiety busters below.\n\nThe more you commit, the better you'll feel.\n\nYou're probably familiar with some of these anxiety strategies. But if you experience racing thoughts, tightening in your chest, and shortness of breath, you haven't done all of them.\n\nAnxiety Buster #1: Start Deep-Breathing\n\nIf you're not focused on how to calm your body through slow, intentional belly-breathing, you're missing out. Belly-breathing is free, location independent, and easy to implement.\n\n1. Sit with your eyes closed and turn your attention to your breathing. Breathe naturally, preferably through the nostrils, without attempting to control your breath.\n\n2. Be aware of the sensation of the breath as it enters and leaves the nostrils. Place one hand on your belly, and the other on your chest. Take a deep breath for a count of four. Hold your breath for a count of three. Exhale for a count of four. The hand on your belly should go in as you inhale, and move out as you exhale.\n\n3. Concentrate on your breath and forget everything else. Your mind will be very busy, and you may even feel that the meditation is making your mind busier, but the reality is you're just becoming more aware of how busy your mind is.\n\n4. Resist the temptation to follow the different thoughts as they arise, and focus on the sensation of the breath. If you discover that your mind has wandered and is following your thoughts, immediately return it to the breath.\n\n5. Repeat this as many times as necessary until your mind settles on the breath.\nDon't wait to begin belly-breathing. The sooner you make this a daily habit, the quicker you'll feel relaxed.\n\nWhen you implement belly-breathing, you start the day in a here-and-now state. Better yet, you're not wasting time worrying about the future, or reliving the past.\n\n\nAnxiety Buster #2: Meditate instead of Medicate\n\nCalm is an inside job. Give yourself the gift of serenity and start the day with ten minutes of solitude and positive energy. Think calm, measured and open-minded, and your daily activities will correspond.\n \n\n\nAnxiety Buster #3: Practice Self-Care\n\nGet a massage, a mani-pedi, or a haircut. Nothing says polished and well-maintained like a sexy, healthy glow.\n\nIf money is tight, look for a discount salon or a training school which offers quality services for people on a budget. So they don't serve peppermint tea on a silver tray -- close your eyes and imagine that five-star service while you take in the pampering you deserve.\n Anxiety Buster #4: Eliminate Soda\n\nThat morning jolt of joe can jumpstart your day and provide warmth and comfort, but anything with high fructose corn syrup and 177 other ingredients will not.\n\nIf you're accustomed to that 3:00 p.m. Dr. Pepper, switch it out for a soothing green tea. Not only does the caffeine jack up your central nervous system, soda depletes vitamins and minerals from your diet and wreaks havoc on your smile. Teeth become susceptible to cavities when the acid level of your saliva falls below a certain point.\n\nIf you drink soda all day, the outer layers of your teeth begin to lose minerals and cavities form. Many dental plans do not cover root canals + you'll end with a huge bill. Speaking of which:\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #5: Trim the Fat from Your Budget\n\nFinancial stress is a common reason people contact me for psychotherapy. Debt will keep you up at night and contribute to feelings of low self-worth and hopelessness.\n\nTake charge of your finances and stop spending on non-essentials.\n\nTrack your daily expenses for a week or two and decide where you can cut back. Notice the items you accumulate mindlessly.\n\nPossible eliminators:\narticle continues after advertisement\n\n    Switch out your cable TV for Netflix\n    Contact your car insurance carrier, your mobile device company, or your credit card company and ask if they'll reduce your bill\n    Cancel your newspaper delivery during the week and opt for the Sunday paper, or an online service, instead\n\n\nAnxiety Buster #6: Get Rid of the Clutter\n\nDo you ever wonder how much time is lost when you can't find your car keys, or that package of Epson 400 color ink?\n\nChances are you've got too much stuff clogging up your living space.\n\nTry this quick organization hack:\n\n1. Choose a drawer, cabinet or closet\n2. Categorize the stuff you don't use\n3. Make three piles for a) Items to throw away, b) Items to donate, and c) Items to sell\n\nHold a yard sale and use the money to...\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #7: Plan a Day Trip\n\nWhen you spend time in nature, you give your mind and body a much needed break from the hustle and bustle which causes you to Google things like \"How to get rid of anxiety\" in the first place.\n\nChances are no matter where you live, there's a serene, interesting and charming place within a couple hours.\n \narticle continues after advertisement\n\nAnxiety Buster #8: Go to Bed Early\n\nThis may sound impossible if you're accustomed to staying up late to catch up on the To-Do list. But this one's a MUST.\n\nSleep deprivation is a huge anxiety culprit. Inadequate shuteye can amplify the brain's anticipatory reactions, upping overall anxiety levels, according to research.\n\n\"We all have anticipatory anxiety,\" explains researcher Fugen Neziroglu. \"Having moderate levels of anxiety about doing well is important. But it can be destructive when it begins to interfere with your life.\" It's impossible to have healthy emotional functioning without adequate sleep.\n\nDon't burn the midnight oil in hopes of catching up on the weekends. Unused sleep minutes don't roll over.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #9 Wake up 15 Minutes Early\n\nLike most anxious people, you're probably rushing around in the morning and yelling at everyone in your wake, \"Hurry up! We're going to be late!\"\n\nGo slowly, and set yourself up for a relaxed day ahead. If you start to worry about the To-Do list, take a deep breath and think, There is enough time.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #10: Get Your Lavender On!\n\nLavender oil has many healing properties and can be used as a natural remedy to reduce anxiety and other nervous conditions. There are many ways to incorporate lavender into your calm tool kit:\n\n1. Add essential lavender oil to your bath water for a calming bath. Use water infused with lavender leaves to soothe painful joints and muscles.\n\n2. Fall asleep quicker when you add a few drops to a tissue and place under your pillow.\n\n3. Use lavender in an oil diffuser to help with insomnia. The sweet woody smell of the lavender oil helps you to fall asleep and stay asleep.\n\n4. For headaches, apply lavender oil to a cotton ball or your fingertips and massage slowly into your temples. The smell will relax you as the oil eases your headache.\n\n5. Lavender is used in aromatherapy massage as a muscle relaxant. Massage the oil into the skin and unknot the muscles of the back and reduce spasms.\n\n6. Lavender can be used as an expectorant. It breaks up the mucous from nasal and chest congestion that accompanies a cold.\n\n7. Inhale lavender oil to help with pain management, especially after a workout, a therapy session, or surgery.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #11: Reduce Caffeine, Sugar and Processed Foods From Your Diet\n\nCaffeine can cause heart palpitations if you ingest too much. Caffeine also can trigger panic or anxiety attacks, especially if you have an anxiety disorder. Hypoglycemia, or low blood sugar, can also cause palpitations.\n\nSugar acts as an adrenal stimulant and can cause anxiety or even panic attacks. Other offensive foods include those containing refined flour products, and even wheat since this causes inflammation.\n\nBesides caffeine, and sugar, food allergies are a big contributing factor in your overactive central nervous system. Do this step along with #12...\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #12: Go Green!\n\nDiet affects anxiety. A morning glass of green juice can get you on the right side of calm.\n\nFor a different and delicious way to get your daily vegetables try this recipe: Combine one banana or green apple, a bunch of kale, sliced ginger, one lime, cucumber slices, a few ice cubes, and a cup of water to a blender or juicer. For added protein, add an egg, yogurt, nuts, or protein powder.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #13: Know that Feelings Are Not Facts\n\nOne of the hardest jobs of a psychotherapist is to convince your anxious client that the feelings of low self-worth, guilt and shame are not accurate. Negative thoughts cause negative feelings. This one's tricky because many of our negative thoughts are automatic, deeply internalized, and rooted in the unconscious.\n\nDo this in tandem with #14...\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #14: Challenge Negative Core Beliefs\n\nRemember that thoughts precede feelings. Negative thoughts lead to negative emotions, which lead to negative behaviors. For example:\n\n    Jocelyn wakes up and immediately thinks, I'm gonna blow the PowerPoint presentation today. I just want to stay in bed all day\n    She feels unmotivated, nervous and sluggish\n    She yells at her kids when they don't dress fast enough\n\n\nHow to challenge your negative mood:\n\n1. Record your thoughts periodically. Pay attention to when you feel stressed out.\n\n2. Write the feelings that accompany the thoughts. Think one-word responses like frustrated, angry, worthless and defeated, etc.\n\n3. Challenge reality. This is hard because we tend to lack objectivity about the truth. Is there proof you don't deserve that job promotion? Were you written up because of shoddy work performance?\n\nIf you commit to recording your daily thoughts and feelings, along with reality testing, you'll see that many of your negative feelings are created in your mind, and not based in reality.\nThe good news is you created the negative thought, and you can uncreate it.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #15: Practice Gratitude\n\nAs bad as your situation is, there's always someone in a worse predicament.\nRead a chapter of Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl, or check out the headline of the daily newspaper. Be thankful your life is not the feature story.\n\nMake a mental note of the positive things in your life. Remember everything in life is temporary -- the good, the bad, and the ugly.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #16: Get Some Accountability\n\nIf you're BFF with Nervous Nellie or Anxious Allen, put your keyed-up energy to good use. Vow to work on healthier ways to cope when feeling stressed.\n\nHow to get your accountability on:\n\n    Share this resource with a friend\n    Pick a few strategies that resonate with both of you\n    Make a plan to call each other out when you stray\n    Give praise when you make positive changes\n    Start a Facebook group and post regular tips to decrease stress and anxiety\n\n\nAnxiety Buster #17: Attend a Social Gathering (Even If You Don't Want To)\n\nIf you're prone to social anxiety, it's important to make time for socialization. It's cool to be an introvert, but know that we live in a universe that revolves around connecting with others.\n\n\nAnxiety Buster #18: Schedule a Physical Exam to Rule Out a Medical Condition for Your Anxiety\n\nIf your anxiety has spiked recently, or if you were previously able to cope with life, and now not so much, your doctor can determine if there's a medical condition responsible for your anxiety. Ask for a blood panel, and be honest about your symptoms.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #19: Schedule a Visit with a Therapist\n\nNobody deserves to feel bad. A qualified mental health professional is your best bet if your anxiety is unbearable.\n\nAsk a trusted friend or colleague for a referral, or use the Psychology Today directory for a therapist in your area.\n \n\nAnxiety Buster #20: Exercise, Exercise, Exercise!\n\nExercise is nature's anti-anxiety remedy. Besides clearing the mind, firing up the endorphins, and helping you sleep soundly at night, researchers have found that individuals who exercise vigorously and regularly were 25 percent less likely to develop an anxiety disorder within five years.\n\nAnxiety Buster #21: Accept Your Anxiety\n\nWhether you inherited the \"anxiety gene\" from your parents, or your lifestyle, or both, accept your anxiety rather than fight it.\n\nIt's not about rolling over and giving up. Understand you have to work hard every day to bring calm to your environment.\n\nRemember there's always options in life, and worse fates exist than being anxiety-sensitive. After all, when push comes to shove, at the end of the (stressed out) day, anxious people get the job done!\n\nAnxiety Buster #22: Check Out These Free Online Resources\n\nI've created a few relaxation audios for you. All resources are free, downloadable and portable. You can download them here (link is external).\n\nThe key to making the actions above work is consistency. You're the expert on your life. Choose the ones that work best for you, and give 'em a shot.\n\nSee you on the calm side!",
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      "body": "nice post. really love the post.....",
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      "body": "nice post..",
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      "body": "Thank you!",
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      "body": "nice sketch....",
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      "body": "very nice post, really love it.",
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      "title": "\"THE BREAK UP\"",
      "body": "This script is to be played by a male and a female. The two have recently been going through fights so the man, Jonathan, decides to break up with the woman, Cassandra. Cassandra does not agree with this and from this, so a hilarious fight breaks out between the two, mentioning funny past events.\n\n \n\nJonathan (J): Cassandra, I think we should break up. There's been a lot going on between us and I don't think we're right for each other.\n\nCassandra (C): What do you mean?\n\nJ: (Sighing) We just aren't meant for each other anymore.\n\nC: (Confused) We are perfect for each other! What went wrong.\n\nJ: (motions around the house) Your shit is all over the place!\n\nC: Uh, no it isn't! If it was, you would've called a plumber.\n\nJ: (Aggravated) Not that type of shit.\n\nC: Then what are you talking about?\n\nJ: (Picking up items) Shirt, socks, bra, underwear, shit, shit. Shit! Shit! SHIT!\n\nC: (Picking up Jonathan's items) Socks, shirts, shorts, shoes, more socks, and more shit than I've ever had in my life!\n\nJ: Are you kidding me? This is my house. I can do what I want with it.\n\nC: I pay rent, I can do what I want with this house!\n\nJ: We just are not meant to be together, okay?\n\nC: Fine. Get out.\n\nJ: What? It's MY house!\n\nC: Really? (holds up a piece of paper, regarding ownership of the house)\n\nJ: Are you kidding me?\n\nC: (Marks out Jonathon's name and writes 'Cassandra')\n\nJ: (Snatches paper) What did you do?\n\nC: (Cackling) Get out of MY house!\n\nJ: Cassandra, we've been over this before.\n\nC: Oh we have?\n\nJ: Yes! We have! Now give me back my house.\n\nC: You mean my house?\n\nJ: Don't do this.\n\nC: (holding a chainsaw) Do what?\n\nJ: We've been over this too.\n\nC: (sawing table in half) Since when?\n\nJ: My table! (table breaks in half)\n\nC: Ha!\n\nJ: Get out.\n\nC: No!\n\nJ: (grabs chainsaw and points it toward Cassandra)\n\nC: (grabs shovel and hits Johnathon on the head, knocking him out)\n\n \n\nTo be continued...",
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      "body": "Very nice post....",
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