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      "author": "msmacon",
      "permlink": "i-m-not-a-feminist",
      "title": "I'm Not A Feminist...",
      "body": "I simply believe in women being better, and doing better, to better women. \n\n![IMG_35311.gif](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmYA8gn3HTQJxTtV5E1vx2LrEqYh89nbsiRhRDGjxG8Ye4/IMG_35311.gif)\n\n\n\nThere’s this old image of the feminist; the plaid wearing, bra-burning, man-hating, Feminazi that doesn’t shave and has a fucking opinion on everything.\n\nIf you know anything about me at all, you know I parade around with my gorgeous hair in stiletto heels with a pack of pit bulls and an affinity for calling folk names like “sugar” and “babycakes”. In addition, I can’t burn my bras, I’m a DD, and they’re fucking expensive.\n\nHowever, when it comes to opinions, you can bet the farm on the fact that I have them, and they’re well researched and steeped in fact, fuckface, so don’t start a fight you’re not prepared to dig out your Encyclopedia Britannica to win.\n\nI often refute the feminist label tossed my way by those claiming I run a She-Ra, Man Haters Club. Bitch, please. I wouldn’t waste anything She-Ra on something so petty as a man. Those are fucking collector’s items now.\n\nLook, babycakes, it’s like this; I’m not a feminist. However, I’m a woman in the South with an education, some all-around decent knowledge, and a platform. My mouth writes checks, but bitch, my ass can cash them. Yet, I cannot seem to separate the term “feminist” from the unpleasant look that you often see people get across their little nasty frowning faces when it is said.\n\nI prefer to call myself a champion of the underdog, and a defender of those that have been oppressed, or beaten into submission by some arrogant sack of shit that thought he had hands when it came to something smaller than himself. Those are my favorite to toe to toe with. Bitch, my cousin trained Buster Douglas, and I’m a leftie. They never even see that shit coming.\n\nI do work hard to elevate women, yes, because if you can do better, girl then by all means, fucking do better. I do work to ensure that animals are out of the hands of abusive fuckbags, yes, because those good bois and good, good girls deserve better than that. And because of my own daddy issues, I step in when it comes to those little bratty ass kids y’all keep making me the Godmomma to. Or, in my case, Aunt Meow (the sparkly Aunt :)\n\nI actively work my adorable ass off to make sure that I don’t sit around and watch injustices against the weaker and smaller, so they won’t happen on my watch. I just didn’t realize until today that my watch has been on shift since about 1997. Does that mean I need a break? Fuck no, it just means someone is going to pay me all this fucking overtime. And fast, y’all know I don’t play about my money.\n\nToday, a reader of mine told me that RBG was looking down at me proudly. Can I tell y’all I wept like a child when I read that? Ugly crying, like until my mascara lost its’ waterproof right down my damned face.\n\nI have never been more proud of the woman I am. Because for everything that I’m not, for all the things I failed at, didn’t quite achieve, or took the L doing, I have stood for women being better for the sake of being better women for every single day since my little chubby feet hit the damned floor in 1979.\n\nSo, if you ask me if I’m a feminist, the answer is “of course not, I don’t wear plaid in May”. But if you ask me if I elevate women, defend the rights of women, stand in the corner of being better women?\n\nHoney, Ask A Bitchface. You know I’ll tell you exactly what the fucking problem is.",
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      "body": "You might think, with all of the cash shit that I talk on the daily, that I’m one of those “everyone has the right to believe” whatever type of dumb shit they actually believe.\n\nI’m not.\n\nI actually believe some people are too stupid to do their own thinking. I believe many things should require an IQ test. Parenting. Politics. Any job with contact with other human beings. All of these should have a minimum level of intelligence necessary to be allowed to do it.\n\nBut, here we are, no testing, and a world full of fucking morons.\n\nSometimes, though, I’m almost floored by the fucking stupidity that is rampant. I can’t quite tell if people are just dumbing themselves down to fit in, or if they really are too dumb to tie their own shoes. Like, are these people really tying their own shoes though?\n\nOver at UT, notoriously expensive party school downtown, an off campus raging party took place. The dean suspended pretty much anyone he could tie to the party, and the news cameras went down to the campus to speak to some idiots. Ok, read this with a 50k tuition in your mind: (female student) “Well, we could either be sitting here bored or we could be drunk”.\n\nThe parental pride doesn’t stop there.\n\n“We thought social distancing didn’t apply to off-campus housing”. Yes, you, college student who allegedly passed the SAT’s apparently thought that COVID was restricted to campus borders. It can’t follow you to that kegger 4 blocks over on Ashley Street.\n\nAm I in the fucking Twilight Zone? What are you parents feeding these kids? Rocks?\n\nChrist.\n\nLook, I get it. We all get it. You’re in college, life is supposed to be one big party, boo hoo hoo for you. But not really. Because shut up.\n\nNot everyone got to go to college and simply go to college. I, for one, worked full time and went to school full time, so I didn’t live the party life. And, unbelievably, I still got a degree for all of that money.\n\nShocking, I know.\n\nEntitlement is a drug in this country, and a few of your households need rehab, and in a bad way. None of us are entitled to anything. If you are doing more than eating in a home with the utilities on every day, you need to shut the fuck up and count your blessings.\n\nI have problems at my house, just like everyone else. Do you ever hear me complain about a damned thing in my home? Hell no, because I have been at points in my life where I didn’t know where I would call home. I don’t take shit for granted here.\n\nThat’s some of what needs to be taught to these punk ass kids. They did not earn anything simply by waking up. So maybe, shut up, and understand that there are way bigger problems than whether or not you got to go do keg stands and sleep with two dudes simultaneously last weekend, ok. Just try a healthy dose of the real world for a minute, preferably before you go on camera for the news looking like a fucking idiot.\n\nThere is more to life than suburban America. There is more to life than the sitcom family. There is a whole different world outside of the bubble. Step outside of it and get a breath of reality every now and then.\n![118242292_303916934165714_7191074107047585603_n.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVdEiUPk7wcbiDUh6WTDWDjgo8GGeY3kyZXRFdYacbLfR/118242292_303916934165714_7191074107047585603_n.jpg)",
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      "body": "![🔮Psychic Readings Love Spells🔮 on Instagram_ “😂🔮Are you tired of making bad decisions_ 😖🤦🏽_♀️ Dating the wrong person_ ❌ Does your life have you questioning your decisions_ 🤷🏽_♀️_…”.jpeg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmWEbSpgk5gAiSAsto2aXCqux1dRPj3nD4Ka7nm7ZjvP44/%F0%9F%94%AEPsychic%20Readings%20Love%20Spells%F0%9F%94%AE%20on%20Instagram_%20%E2%80%9C%F0%9F%98%82%F0%9F%94%AEAre%20you%20tired%20of%20making%20bad%20decisions_%20%F0%9F%98%96%F0%9F%A4%A6%F0%9F%8F%BD_%E2%99%80%EF%B8%8F%20Dating%20the%20wrong%20person_%20%E2%9D%8C%20Does%20your%20life%20have%20you%20questioning%20your%20decisions_%20%F0%9F%A4%B7%F0%9F%8F%BD_%E2%99%80%EF%B8%8F_%E2%80%A6%E2%80%9D.jpeg)\nSince it seems we have no shortage of testosterone fueled idiots that are hop skipping their way to the police academies, then come down with the “blue flu” when asked to be held accountable for their actions, let’s do like we do with puppies and toddlers, and redirect their foolishness.\n\nFor example, instead of focusing on young black men, let’s point them in the direction of those that abuse children, and rape women. I can think of a good 50 or 60 sets of parents that have made the news in the last year that really need to be shot, unarmed in their homes.\n\nA couple in Phoenix, who hid the body of their 11 year old foster daughter in the attic for 2 years, they were able to adopt another child, I wouldn’t mind if a SWAT team broke down their door in the middle of the night randomly shooting people.\n\nA Warren Co, Mo. couple that forgot to handcuff his 12-year-old son to his bed rail, allowing the beaten and battered child to escape the piece of shit father and evil stepmother, I would love to see them shot to death unarmed in a traffic stop.\n\nJoseph McCann, who had victims ranging from 11 to 71 of his serial rapes, over in London should definitely get his airfare handled so he could get his ass handed to him in any American city of his choosing. Doesn’t matter which one, it appears they can handle the task anywhere from Maine to Washington.\n\nThere is an online fueled #metoo movement that popped off over in Spokane with women openly naming their rapists, if known, and discussing the circumstances of the assaults. This includes the inactivity of the police department when it comes to getting justice for these victims. Any of the dudes on this list could be my pick for the next rapist to “look like a suspect” and be shot down in the streets.\n\n“No, Ms. Macon, that isn’t how justice works here”, I can hear it now. Isn’t it? Isn’t this how we allow them to act?\n\nOh. Oh, that’s right. None of the people I just named off were unarmed black men.\n\nShit. What was I thinking?",
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      "body": "The Blatant Evidence That I Ignored…\n\nThese Are The Facts That Exposed My Ex When He Was Sleeping With Men Behind My Back, And The Excuses I Made…\n\nI've talked of my ex before, Grindr. The individual who single-handedly has made my stomach roll at the thought of ever dating again. However, I don't usually speak of how I found out all of the sordid details, because I hate that I ever actually looked for them. \n\nNot as though I had to look hard, because he didn't really try to cover his tracks. He was either so arrogant or so callous, it didn't matter to him if I discovered him talking to other men about how attractive they found each other's dicks. He wasn't worried about me finding a conversation between he and a gay couple where they spoke of one in his ass, which the other sucked his dick. \n\nToday, years later, I can speak of the things that I found. The conversations I read. The pictures. The video. Yes, that too. \nI know that the pain was so searing at the time, and I couldn't express it, because of the shame. I was humiliated. He cheated on me, with men. He slept around on me, with men. \nLord, you should have seen the sheer hatred for me on his face when I asked him, \"why didn't you just tell me you were gay?\" He tried to choke me to death for that, because \"he isn't gay\", and \"I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about\". \n\nThe video, plain as the day is long, with his very recognizable birthmark…I evidently made that up. Not the birthmark, the video. Clearly I'm Stephen fucking Spielberg over here, what with my porn production degree and all. \n\nSee, it was supposed to be okay that he cheat on me with me. I just was never to acknowledge he was doing so, or ever question him about it. That way, he could continue to pretend that I was the problem. I was the one who was a terrible person. \n\nI Knew When He Spoke To Me In A Shitty Tone, Simply To Start A Fight.\nThat was how he \"had to get away from me\", because he had no excuse for leaving the house at 2 or 3 in the morning. He would deliberately start huge fights, scream and throw fits like a spoiled child, then walk out. Hours later, he would return, then start the silent treatment. This way, I knew I was wrong, and that I should apologize for my terrible behavior. \n\nI Knew When He Locked His Phone, And When I Needed To Make A Call To My Own Phone, He Wouldn't Allow Me To Touch His Phone. He Called For Me.\nLook, everyone has a right to a level of privacy. However, if anyone needed to pick up my phone and dial their own phone right now, there's nothing that serious that I would see it as a problem. I'm not living a double life, though, so I guess that's why I'm so la-de-dah free and easy with my phone. \n\nI Knew When He Started Telling Me All Of The Things About My Personality That Made Him Find Me Unattractive. \nListen, I have seen guys take home ladies with no teeth and no shoes from the bar when they thought nobody was looking. Hideous hosebeasts. I have held up well over the years. I write comedy, so I know I'm good for a laugh. And yet, somehow, this piece of white Carolina trash couldn't find a single redeeming quality to cause a rustle in his pants? Right. I have nothing rustling in my pants. \n\nI Told Myself That It Couldn't Be, There's Just No Way.\nBut I knew as I said it, I was lying to myself. He was fucking men behind my back and didn't even care enough to delete the messages and videos. \n\nI may not have known enough to avoid him to begin with, but I knew enough to close the chapter on that narcissistic piece of shit. \n\n\n![andrew-neel-fGvXxVxmTi8-unsplash.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmXiwCXai4DHnWQZYTNhXG2c7tpK7CdynU43XyVBzjV2SK/andrew-neel-fGvXxVxmTi8-unsplash.jpg)\nGood riddance, fuckface.",
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      "body": "Don’t get the surprised Pikachu face now.\n\nY’all elected that Oompa Loompa hued moron with him already talking about using Section 606 to essentially grab the internet by the pussy and do as he so pleases with it. This should not be coming to you as new gnus now.\n\nAlso, with William Barr being CIA alumni, this whole operation can be wired up, shut down, and North Korea’d before dinnertime this evening.\n\nNow you would think, with all of the internet and interwaves that I manage to absolutely enrage in the span of a couple of hours a day that I would be a little more familiar with the processes of the FCC. Alas, I’m not. I am smart enough to understand, though, that if all it takes to shut down a facet of the internet that has gotten into a Twitter titty twister with Trump this week is for him to find the backing of the Attorney General…I mean, damn, Gina…that’s already gift wrapped, isn’t it?\n\nI am no longer surprised by any pardon, any faux pas, any collusion, it all just seems to be business as usual when we’re talking that knuckle-dragging, porn star raw dogging, testament to exactly why late-term abortions should be encouraged in certain situations. It’s just another shenanigan that this administration has tacked onto the other three rings in this shitshow.\n\nI wouldn’t even bat an eyelash if Lieberman brought his magic markers into the Oval Office and drew up the schematics for him.\n\nI can already hear that marmalade toned moron patting himself on the back for his new invention…that China came up with. Let’s just do what we did with the “Space Force”…when nobody had the balls to tell him we’ve had that for upward of 50 years…it’s called NASA, asshole.\n![samantha-sophia-8bLGxhsR8sY-unsplash.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmZxdM95Fjtg6zbxCFDUBPZR9bykBnEZcTjLBV66smv19g/samantha-sophia-8bLGxhsR8sY-unsplash.jpg)",
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      "author": "msmacon",
      "permlink": "can-someone-please-hand-me-a-wifi-jammer",
      "title": "Can Someone Please Hand Me A WiFi Jammer?",
      "body": "Don’t get the surprised Pikachu face now.\n\nY’all elected that Oompa Loompa hued moron with him already talking about using Section 606 to essentially grab the internet by the pussy and do as he so pleases with it. This should not be coming to you as new gnus now.\n\nAlso, with William Barr being CIA alumni, this whole operation can be wired up, shut down, and North Korea’d before dinnertime this evening.\n\nNow you would think, with all of the internet and interwaves that I manage to absolutely enrage in the span of a couple of hours a day that I would be a little more familiar with the processes of the FCC. Alas, I’m not. I am smart enough to understand, though, that if all it takes to shut down a facet of the internet that has gotten into a Twitter titty twister with Trump this week is for him to find the backing of the Attorney General…I mean, damn, Gina…that’s already gift wrapped, isn’t it?\n\nI am no longer surprised by any pardon, any faux pas, any collusion, it all just seems to be business as usual when we’re talking that knuckle-dragging, porn star raw dogging, testament to exactly why late-term abortions should be encouraged in certain situations. It’s just another shenanigan that this administration has tacked onto the other three rings in this shitshow.\n\nI wouldn’t even bat an eyelash if Lieberman brought his magic markers into the Oval Office and drew up the schematics for him.\n\nI can already hear that marmalade toned moron patting himself on the back for his new invention…that China came up with. Let’s just do what we did with the “Space Force”…when nobody had the balls to tell him we’ve had that for upward of \n![samantha-sophia-8bLGxhsR8sY-unsplash.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmZxdM95Fjtg6zbxCFDUBPZR9bykBnEZcTjLBV66smv19g/samantha-sophia-8bLGxhsR8sY-unsplash.jpg)\n50 years…it’s called NASA, asshole.",
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      "body": "Today, I went to the corner store. I drug my feet around and whined and threw myself on the floor like a damned toddler, but after all of that nonsense, I remembered that we don’t have Favor or any of the other 7-11 delivery services yet.\n\nSo, after dusting myself off and wiping my tears off my face with the closest hundred dollar bill, I put Tyra on a leash, and Puffin in her straightjacket, and we meandered down to the beverage castle at the next street over. We almost melted in the 3.2 minutes it took to get there because it’s at least 6,200 degrees outside, but that isn’t the issue at hand.\n\nThere are always way too many people at the beverage castle. Cars lined up down the street, bicycles, jitterbugs on their little spacecraft hovershits, crazy broads with pit bulls… it’s a regular Barnum and Bailey in this bitch. What it isn’t, though, is wearing a mask.\n\nNot the chic handing people their purchases. Not the chic pretending to stock but really texting. Not any of the 14 jitterbugs trying to buy cigarettes when none of them can be a day over 15. Not the bread guy, the Bud Light man, the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker.\n\nNow, I’ll admit, we don’t have the reputation for being gentlemen and scholars down here in the Sunshine State. Florida Man has done some shit that has really made it hard for me to be proud of my beautiful home in The Bay. But, in the move to really just beat the dumb right into those that live near us, we’ve decided to start filing lawsuits because wearing masks is “uncomfortable”. That’s right. Un. Com. Fortable.\n\nListen, I tended bar in 5” stiletto heels for 12 hours a day. That. is uncomfortable. Popping this little piece of cloth on my face so that I don’t have to engage with the assholes around me? Pssssssshhhhh….no brainer. If there’s any way at all I can get out of talking to my drunk ass neighbor A or drunk ass neighbor B, hand me the sign up sheet because you aren’t writing my information down quickly enough.\n\nUncomfortable.\n\nGet the fuck out of here.\n\n\n![IMG_35331.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmX1LyPeFugTy9w34HXo5LEZgfRG6K2UAAN553pxA4RC18/IMG_35331.jpg)",
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      "body": "Today, I went to the corner store. I drug my feet around and whined and threw myself on the floor like a damned toddler, but after all of that nonsense, I remembered that we don’t have Favor or any of the other 7-11 delivery services yet.\n\nSo, after dusting myself off and wiping my tears off my face with the closest hundred dollar bill, I put Tyra on a leash, and Puffin in her straightjacket, and we meandered down to the beverage castle at the next street over. We almost melted in the 3.2 minutes it took to get there because it’s at least 6,200 degrees outside, but that isn’t the issue at hand.\n\nThere are always way too many people at the beverage castle. Cars lined up down the street, bicycles, jitterbugs on their little spacecraft hovershits, crazy broads with pit bulls… it’s a regular Barnum and Bailey in this bitch. What it isn’t, though, is wearing a mask.\n\nNot the chic handing people their purchases. Not the chic pretending to stock but really texting. Not any of the 14 jitterbugs trying to buy cigarettes when none of them can be a day over 15. Not the bread guy, the Bud Light man, the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker.\n\nNow, I’ll admit, we don’t have the reputation for being gentlemen and scholars down here in the Sunshine State. Florida Man has done some shit that has really made it hard for me to be proud of my beautiful home in The Bay. But, in the move to really just beat the dumb right into those that live near us, we’ve decided to start filing lawsuits because wearing masks is “uncomfortable”. That’s right. Un. Com. Fortable.\n\nListen, I tended bar in 5” stiletto heels for 12 hours a day. That. is uncomfortable. Popping this little piece of cloth on my face so that I don’t have to engage with the assholes around me? Pssssssshhhhh….no brainer. If there’s any way at all I can get out of talking to my drunk ass neighbor A or drunk ass neighbor B, hand me the sign up sheet because you aren’t writing my information down quickly enough.\n\nUncomfortable.\n\nGet the fuck out of here.\n\n\n![IMG_35331.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmX1LyPeFugTy9w34HXo5LEZgfRG6K2UAAN553pxA4RC18/IMG_35331.jpg)",
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      "permlink": "so-you-just-refuse-to-see-anyone",
      "title": "So, You Just...Refuse To See Anyone?",
      "body": "I was neck-deep in a technical paper yesterday and found myself talking with a couple of my former techs. Great people, always help me with any question that I can’t research to death, I respect them all immensely, and it’s reciprocated.\n\nI was giving the quick rundown of “yeah, no change here, still super bitchy, still mean as a pit viper”, and my diesel tech that wasted a few clutches trying to teach me hi from lo gears asked me, “so are you Ok since, ya know, I heard about Corey…”\n\nI must admit, it stung a little hearing his name. I know he’s gone, it’s been 6 months, I am aware of the stages of grief. But to hear someone else, someone I respect so much ask me with, I dunno, trepidation in his voice…maybe afraid I was going to fall apart, maybe afraid I was going to remind him I have no feelings.\n\nI said, “yeah, I’m ok, I don’t dwell on that part of my life. I don’t dwell on anything involving significant others, I’m pretty significant to my damned self”. He laughed, but then he said “so, what, you just gave up? You just refuse to see anyone? Are you back to that celibate thing you did in 2001?”\n\nDear God, no, that was a different type of alone. I needed to wrap my brain around the fact that I was a fuckboy magnet then. Now, I just don’t even address it. I hear people ask me, but I pretend like I don’t. It’s just not worth discussing anymore.\n\nI usually say I’m not planning alone, but alone keeps making plans with me. Who am I to stand alone up? That’s fucking rude.\n\nI’m just…tired. I’m tired of the lies they tell me, I’m tired of the way that finding out the truth feels like I’m being punched in the chest. I’m tired of the letdown, the “oh…ok” when, yet again, everything I thought he was is nothing near the truth. What’s the point? If I can just be ok, not great, but really and truly ok, then I would rather be exactly this than the runny mascara mess I am at the letdown. Ok is even-keeled. Ok is steady.\n\nI feel like in matters in love, I’ve been drug around by my heart and not gently either. So for me, I think that it’s not really a refusal, it’s a lack of acknowledgment that normal people move forward. I think I’ll stay right here where I’m in familiar territory. I think I’ll stay right here where I know the lay of the land.\n\n\n![15cf28b8b2fd23c40b5e3458463e4033.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmfWRnTFSujwWDyhPRDQgpiidFMDChzKBxY3zJcja3DVwc/15cf28b8b2fd23c40b5e3458463e4033.jpg)",
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      "permlink": "do-you-feel-any-closure-how-about-now-now",
      "title": "Do you feel any closure?  How about now?  Now...?",
      "body": "I wanted to come here to you tonight, absolutely beaming and patting myself on my proverbial back, giddy with excitement about telling y'all how I had finally, thank you, Baby Jesus, finally, written him out of existence. I wanted to say \"It can be done! Look, I'm the proof!\" I am dismayed to inform y'all, I wrote 2,000 words about that douchhole and I feel much the same as I did at 2 p.m. and 2,000 less to my byline. It physically pained me to just type that, however, I digress.\n\n![70ca59de9f51eb6224260bdb883ef256.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbA7mLHspf1KZNDB9NthiDaXoRpnoUP2weJXAAn2CkJCL/70ca59de9f51eb6224260bdb883ef256.jpg)\nI wish I had some unarguable reason behind recalling the worst decision I made in an easy 20-year span, but my answer is the same as usual. What possible reason could I have for traveling into the pits of hell to retrieve the box that holds his memory? For my column, duh.\n\nI like to believe that one day, a woman will be blindly stumbling along in her normal, awesome existence, and she will have a collision with a cloven-hooved beast who somehow can simultaneously show her the hoof, and deny there is a hoof there at all. And when that woman is considering she may be totally out of her mind, and maybe he is right, and perhaps she should listen, she will hear my words like they are being typed on an old Remington, and she will hesitate for long enough to free herself.\n\n![23699df282691e58957c922db8b11225.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmeKQP1uanZsZagxPejgct2tGeoLm9kUBbDw9SHReJxqJu/23699df282691e58957c922db8b11225.jpg)\nThat has to be the moral. That has to be the one thing that gives me any comfort from the entire 2,096,640 minutes of my life that I spent being disassembled by a narcissistic puke. Otherwise, I can say with positivity, there was no benefit at all.\n\nI tried to prepare myself for the feelings that would be drawn to the surface. Truly, I thought that enough time had elapsed that it wouldn't still be horrifying, but I was absolutely incorrect in that assumption.\n\nHave you ever been in a room alone, and thought of a situation from the past, and your behavior made you flush in humiliation, from yourself? That's this situation. I am so embarrassed to be me when I think of it, so humiliated that I ever tolerated or excused it. It's so many miles from the typical realm of woman that I reside in, I almost cannot equate the two ladies, even after all of this time.\n\nWhat I wanted to believe might be a chance for me to recall with some sort of compassion the troubled man I wanted to heal turned into just another dead-end street littered with the abuses that he maimed me with, time after miserable time.\n\nI can tell you with the most serious look you'll ever get from my face, within a span of 20 seconds, he would lie to my face about the exact same thing he had just said to me. Then, with the confidence, only a sociopath can exude, tell me he had not said those very words, and that I was a crazy, stupid cunt. That life wasn't one of my stories (yes, he actually said those very words to me).\n\nLet me give you a red flag that I needed to have pulled from the pole and worn as a damned bathrobe. I literally would press record on my phone as he started into one of his \"I never said that you're a lunatic\" past times that I loved so much. I could sit later, shaking my head, wondering what was actually wrong with me that I ever thought that I could fix this shit. JB Weld couldn't hold this dude together, and that's saying something serious because it held a potted plant to my ceiling for like 5 years. He really had some pieces mentally that didn't come in the box. I should have just gotten up and thrown the entire puzzle away.\n\nI knew halfway through the article that it was helping nothing. It wasn't somehow magically justifying his treatment of me, or my acceptance of it, or my willingness to let abuse explain away his actions, yet I have never afforded myself that excuse. Why were his emotional wounds and trauma worth a free pass, yet my own were handled like an adult so that I could be a functional human being without a crutch?\n\nThere. See that? That's the point I am constantly stuck at. Why? Who gave his sorry ass the season pass to be a total and complete shit bag?\n\nThat's all. Let's not discuss this again.",
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      "body": "Look at this macabre shit, amass round me, spectators, \nCome take a look at all the ways love has beaten me into submission\nPeer here, peers, take in the truly mind boggling map of destruction love has left behind\n\nI, being the absolute ass of a woman well noted prior, refused to tap out\nDespite being knocked repeatedly to the canvas, my pride held me upright as love manhandled me with unabashed fervor.Mangling me, changing me just because I dared to encapsulate it and keep it as my own. \nI attempted to brace myself on the rope tethering me, but it was just a recipe for further entanglement. \nThere was no bell, no merciful call of the fight. \nAll ten rounds were a bloody example of why one should never challenge love\nNo butterfly float could carry me from the ring I feared more than commitment itself, instead,\nI stood up to be beaten down a countless number of times, glaring at the ring girl as she walked past me unscathed to announce the duration of this torturous effort at the prize.\nFinally, the final round was called, the seconds were ticked off tirelessly by the crowd of bloodthirsty bitches waiting for my resolve to finally fade\nBut, deep below the superficial, the bitch I had become bellowed, and I began to drop the left on love.\nLove never suspected a comeback, I brought it all down like a fucking 20 pound sledge and delivered it directly to the breastplate.\nAt last, I had crippled love, it swooned before me, and I dropped one last left upon it, knowing I had just delivered the knock out love had surely brought to my door.\nI spat in loves face, and said \"challenge accepted. Pussy.\"\n\"Undisputed, Bitch \".![15781334_10205841533676496_1098257788385314830_n.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmPPGMcBjcAhNWtY7ty9B4fg9yvZ8Vf3nRMjyzGKcLBBeN/15781334_10205841533676496_1098257788385314830_n.jpg)",
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      "title": "10 Ways Men Can Have More Intense Orgasms",
      "body": "Who doesn't want more intense orgasms? Anyone? You, in the back...?\n\n![FB_IMG_1478432737254.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmQVZgmbPnJujR8iMHiRGqYQaVJ82mUofyhtHT7L78yLYR/FB_IMG_1478432737254.jpg)\nOf course men want more intense orgasms. Those knee-knocking, soul-shaking, eyes rolling back in the skull orgasms.\n\nWhat exactly pushes a man beyond a normal orgasm? How do you get to Intense Orgasm from regular, Tuesday night orgasm? Here are 10 tips to having a mind-numbingly intense orgasm if you're of the male persuasion:\n\nEat Clean.\n\nA well known culprit of erectile dysfunction is high blood pressure. You want to ensure that your pipes are clean and flowing, in every sense. Take care of the rest of your health so your Better Third can take care of you. And her.\n\nDeep Breathing.\n\nAn old kama sutra trick from way back, deep breathing not only improves your circulation, lending you a little more lung for staying power; breathing deeply also gets more oxygen flowing out into your bloodstream for that extra pep in your step. Go ahead and inhale, then inhale some more. It can only help in the grand scheme of things.\n\nGet out of your head, and into your bed.\n\nDon't get lost in your thoughts, lest you wind up on the second stroke down to flaccid town. It is a well known fact that thinking about your mortgage, your mother-in-law, or your matriculation can bring you right back from the ledge. Focus on the scene unfolding before you, the physical. Leave your thoughts where you leave your clothing- outside of the sheets.\n\nCaptain Kegal, reporting for duty...\n\nEveryone knows that Sir Kegal should have been knighted for the brilliant work he did to get your wife back to pre-baby size, but a lot of folks don't know that men have Kegals also. Your pelvic floor muscles, the muscles you use to control your stream of urine, or to, ahem, provide a hook for your towel to hang on. That's them. Strengthen them by using them for the fun tasks I just mentioned, or see what kind of cool tricks you can get yours to do. Nobody is judging you here, big guy.\n\nThese are your Fathers' toys, Andy...To infinity and beyond!\n\nThere are so many toys these days, and not just rabbits and pocket pals, either. Have you tried a vibrating cock ring? Say it with me. Vibrating. Cock ring. If that doesn't have intense orgasm written all over it, it's because there wasn't room to print all of that on the device.\n\nLet's get closer to the edge...\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nEdging is technically the act of decreasing your main mans stimulation prior to climaxing. In other words, holding back until it can be held back no more. The longer you put it off, then bring it back, then put it off, the more geyser-like of a reaction you're going to experience.\n\nPlay Ball!\n\nYes, that's right, those guys are invited to the party also. I know normally they're just hanging around, looking ridiculous and making some unattractive slapping sounds, but they are the forgotten jewels of The Land of Incredible Orgasm. Massage them, let her lick and caress them. They've been the Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum of this tryst for long enough. Let's bring them in on the action, and watch the difference in your reaction.\n\nSqueeze from the bottom of the tube, as advised by the American Dental Association.\n\nTry this time tested trick: Wrap your thumb and forefinger around the base of the shaft, and give it a squeeze. It's similar to stopping the flow through a siphon hose.. The longer the squeeze, the longer the build up to blast off. See also; \"These are your Fathers' toys, Andy...\" . In case you don't have the firmest grip on reality in the heat of the moment, they have accessories that will do this laborious task for you.\n\nYes, that's where we're going. We're heading around the corner...\n\nWe're taking the train to the G spot. All Aboard! Now, this trek off of the beaten path is still known to strike fear in the genitalia of some men, but it has become a much more widely accepted practice as of late. Try having your partner lube two fingers, and begin by massaging your perennial area, slowly working up to insertion. It could take a few times to find the sweet spot, so don't get discouraged. Massaging the G spot will transform you into the Old Faithful of the orgasmic. You'll have no problem figuring out when she's found the place. You'll both know relatively quickly, wink-wink.\n\nNow, I would be remiss if I didn't mention a few of the \"classics\" that made it to the runner up category, but aren't going home with a tiara and sash.\n\nLadies, try giving him a \"night off\". Let him lay back and enjoy the show, while you take the lead. There seems to be a 50/50 split consensus on this method, as some men find it difficult to reach the point of orgasm once they relinquish control. The other half find it to be relaxing and just as good as waxing. This is just going to be based on your personal preference.\n\nAlso in the runner up category, the \"tease\" method. 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      "body": "Congratulations @msmacon! You have completed the following achievement on the Steem blockchain and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :\n\n<table><tr><td><img src=\"https://steemitimages.com/60x60/http://steemitboard.com/img/notifications/firstvote.png\"></td><td>You made your First Vote</td></tr>\n</table>\n\n<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@msmacon) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=msmacon)_</sub>\n<sub>_If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word_ `STOP`</sub>\n\n\n\n###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes!",
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      "body": "Who doesn't want more intense orgasms? Anyone? You, in the back...?\n\nOf course men want more intense orgasms. Those knee-knocking, soul-shaking, eyes rolling back in the skull orgasms.\n\nWhat exactly pushes a man beyond a normal orgasm? How do you get to Intense Orgasm from regular, Tuesday night orgasm? Here are 10 tips to having a mind-numbingly intense orgasm if you're of the male persuasion:\n\nEat Clean.\n\nA well known culprit of erectile dysfunction is high blood pressure. You want to ensure that your pipes are clean and flowing, in every sense. Take care of the rest of your health so your Better Third can take care of you. And her.\n\nDeep Breathing.\n\nAn old kama sutra trick from way back, deep breathing not only improves your circulation, lending you a little more lung for staying power; breathing deeply also gets more oxygen flowing out into your bloodstream for that extra pep in your step. Go ahead and inhale, then inhale some more. It can only help in the grand scheme of things.\n\nGet out of your head, and into your bed.\n\nDon't get lost in your thoughts, lest you wind up on the second stroke down to flaccid town. It is a well known fact that thinking about your mortgage, your mother-in-law, or your matriculation can bring you right back from the ledge. Focus on the scene unfolding before you, the physical. Leave your thoughts where you leave your clothing- outside of the sheets.\n\nCaptain Kegal, reporting for duty...\n\nEveryone knows that Sir Kegal should have been knighted for the brilliant work he did to get your wife back to pre-baby size, but a lot of folks don't know that men have Kegals also. Your pelvic floor muscles, the muscles you use to control your stream of urine, or to, ahem, provide a hook for your towel to hang on. That's them. Strengthen them by using them for the fun tasks I just mentioned, or see what kind of cool tricks you can get yours to do. Nobody is judging you here, big guy.\n\nThese are your Fathers' toys, Andy...To infinity and beyond!\n\nThere are so many toys these days, and not just rabbits and pocket pals, either. Have you tried a vibrating cock ring? Say it with me. Vibrating. Cock ring. If that doesn't have intense orgasm written all over it, it's because there wasn't room to print all of that on the device.\n\nLet's get closer to the edge...\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nEdging is technically the act of decreasing your main mans stimulation prior to climaxing. In other words, holding back until it can be held back no more. The longer you put it off, then bring it back, then put it off, the more geyser-like of a reaction you're going to experience.\n\nPlay Ball!\n\nYes, that's right, those guys are invited to the party also. I know normally they're just hanging around, looking ridiculous and making some unattractive slapping sounds, but they are the forgotten jewels of The Land of Incredible Orgasm. Massage them, let her lick and caress them. They've been the Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum of this tryst for long enough. Let's bring them in on the action, and watch the difference in your reaction.\n\nSqueeze from the bottom of the tube, as advised by the American Dental Association.\n\nTry this time tested trick: Wrap your thumb and forefinger around the base of the shaft, and give it a squeeze. It's similar to stopping the flow through a siphon hose.. The longer the squeeze, the longer the build up to blast off. See also; \"These are your Fathers' toys, Andy...\" . In case you don't have the firmest grip on reality in the heat of the moment, they have accessories that will do this laborious task for you.\n\nYes, that's where we're going. We're heading around the corner...\n\nWe're taking the train to the G spot. All Aboard! Now, this trek off of the beaten path is still known to strike fear in the genitalia of some men, but it has become a much more widely accepted practice as of late. Try having your partner lube two fingers, and begin by massaging your perennial area, slowly working up to insertion. It could take a few times to find the sweet spot, so don't get discouraged. Massaging the G spot will transform you into the Old Faithful of the orgasmic. You'll have no problem figuring out when she's found the place. You'll both know relatively quickly, wink-wink.\n\nNow, I would be remiss if I didn't mention a few of the \"classics\" that made it to the runner up category, but aren't going home with a tiara and sash.\n\nLadies, try giving him a \"night off\". Let him lay back and enjoy the show, while you take the lead. There seems to be a 50/50 split consensus on this method, as some men find it difficult to reach the point of orgasm once they relinquish control. 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      "permlink": "and-yet-you-kiss-your-momma-with-that-mouth",
      "title": "And, yet, you kiss your momma with that mouth?",
      "body": "![Screenshot_20191128-150957.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmNNTuhLLFtKkZ53CKsZmrB3jmNNdBmTajxPn6an3MtMSM/Screenshot_20191128-150957.png)With every platform I write stories on comes a whole new set of guys that apparently think all women are online solely to send them nudes, and be propositioned. I wouldn’t repeat some of the comments in a biker clubhouse, it’s legitimately that nasty. Who are these tired ass lines working on?\n\nWhen are these guys going to learn, a woman’s inbox is not a dating site?\n\nI write across multiple platforms, multiple times per day. I have several blogs, the advice column. That's in addition to the usual social media platforms.\n\nWhat's the one thing they all have in common? \n\nYep. Nasty ass dudes jumping into my direct messages like Airborne Rangers into enemy territory. We're talking full on, unsolicited, bottom of the sludgiest barrel, filth. Young guys, old guys, middle aged soccer dad type guys. \n\nWhy is the draw of the anonymous too much for the average man to resist?\n\nI write an advice column, not a Q&A on kink…\n\nI understand the little butterfly, crush-type feeling being noticed online tends to give to you. I've had it myself. From someone I know. Not some random guy I see has written a story somewhere, so I jump into his inbox and tell him to show me his package. That, to me, is beyond rude. I've just basically reduced that man to a mailbox and a penis. No self respecting man will answer me; in fact, he'll probably block me.\n\nAs the title of my column implies, I'm not being a super friendly Southern Belle. Rather, I'm giving my honest thoughts on cheating spouses and bad friends, and just giving a healthy dose of hurt feelings to those I feel are in need of some reality.\n\nWhat in the hell are these guys thinking? \n\nNothing about my column says \"Man, I really wish some strange guy would ask for nudes from me today...\" I don't even approach the relationship topic set in regards to discussions of myself. There isn't one question I have answered that could possibly be misconstrued. I know. I double checked. Twice.\n\nDoes the perverted direct message ever work?\n\nI think I would actually like to meet the woman that falls for \"send me a video of you and your toy\", or \"you should let me lick your entire body\", from a complete stranger on a writing platform. I think a part of myself might try to justify the behavior if it were a dating website, but actually I was subconsciously shaking my head \"no\" as I typed that.\n\nIt isn't sexy. It doesn't turn women on. It's vile. \n\nA complete stranger is speaking to me more graphically than my first husband ever spoke to me. No part of me is sitting at my desk thinking \"wow, I must allow him to provide this pearl necklace he's speaking of\".\n\nI used to be part of the problem….\n\nI didn't block these Bozos the very first time there was a hint of innuendo. I have corrected that behavior. I am so quick to block these adult theatre Casanovas, sometimes I forget to screenshot the message for reporting reasons. I believe that might be due to my rush to remove the smut from my screen.\n\n\"But, Ms. Macon, he technically isn't hurting anyone...\"\n\nSure, until you consider my age and location aren't visible. For all this dirty Don Juan knew, I was a 17 year old Senior at Fresno High. Or, for that matter, a 70 year old senior at Fresno assisted care. I honestly don't think the specifics matter to these keyboard kinkmeisters.",
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