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      "body": "It's better you leave the table where love is no longer served \ndo something reasonable with your heart \ncheck on my blog I have many related topics on this \nthanks and God bless",
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      "body": "Hi! I am a robot. I just upvoted you! I found similar content that readers might be interested in:\nhttp://ezinearticles.com/?Can-You-Have-A-Good-Marriage-Even-If-Your-Husband-Cheated-Or-Had-An-Affair?&id=6497638",
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      "body": "Hi Friends, It's still your love Doctor here.\n\nToady I want to talk about Marriage but before I start this article I would want to ask you just one question.\n\n           **Can You Have A Good Marriage Even If Your Husband Cheated Or Had An Affair?**\n\nhttps://www.rd.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/07-cheating-signs-sexless.jpg\n\n[source](http://ezinearticles.com/?Can-You-Have-A-Good-Marriage-Even-If-Your-Husband-Cheated-Or-Had-An-Affair?&id=6497638)\nThis is a question that spouses rarely agree upon. It's very common for one spouse to have one view of the marriage while the other has a very different view. Sometimes, the spouses keep their opinions to themselves until infidelity rears its ugly head and the marriage it literally pulled apart and examined from every angle. And, it's usually at this point that it becomes fairly obvious that, while two people are living within the same marriage, those same two people can experience it very differently.\n\n>>I recently heard from a wife who said: \"my husband confessed to cheating on me for three weeks. He insists that it wasn't an affair because it was all about sex only. He says he didn't mean for it to happen and now it's over. He's very reluctant to talk about the details behind it. I want to know what was so wrong in our marriage to make him risk every thing. He insists that there was nothing wrong with me or our marriage. In fact, he insists that our marriage was a good one. I have to admit that I thought the same thing. But I don't think it's possible to have a good marriage if someone cheats. I think that, by definition alone, once infidelity occurs, you have a bad marriage automatically. My husband says this is ridiculous. Who is right?\"\n\nHow Infidelity Can And Does Happen Within Good Marriages: Quite frankly, both people have valid points and both can be right within their own point of reference. On an almost daily basis, I have someone contact me on my blog and insist that they have no idea why they cheated or had an affair when they had a very good life, marriage, and spouse. I believe most of them to be sincere. And I believe that in some cases, your marriage doesn't have as much to do with the infidelity as you might think. Many people cheat as a reaction to personal struggles that are outside of their marriage. They are reacting to a lack of confidence, a personal crises, or a way to find some relief from a struggle that doesn't have anything to do with anyone else but them.\n\nWith that said, it's also possible to be in denial. Sometimes, when you dig a little deeper, you'll find a little undeserved resentment toward their spouse not being able to help them in their crisis. The reaction to that resentment can be passive aggressive behavior which leads to an affair and quite often, this happens without the unfaithful person realizing that it is happening.\n\n>>A Marriage Can Be Good To One Spouse But Not The Other: Sometimes, I have cheating spouses insist that their marriage is still a good one and they believe that they can prove to their spouse if just given a chance. My reaction is often something like \"how good would your marriage be to you if you knew your spouse had been unfaithful?\" Because, just using myself as an example, I thought my marriage was good until I found out about the affair. But once I did, everything changed. Everything seemed as if it were a lie. And so, while my husband would insist that nothing really had changed for him since he had loved me all along, things had definitely changed for me and I could no longer look at my marriage as \"good\" since it had been damaged by infidelity. This didn't mean that I could never see it as good again, because I eventually did.\n\nBut it is so important to understand that there are two people and two perceptions within a marriage. What you consider to be good and fulfilling might be seen and experienced in a completely different way by your spouse (especially after you have cheated.)\n\nSome people disagree with me on this, though. I sometimes hear from couples who have been married for a very long, but freely admit that the marriage is an \"open\" one, meaning one or both of the spouses see other people on the side. Often, every one knows about every one else. (This is often a man with a long term mistress, but it can also be the wife who is unfaithful.) And they will usually insist that every one is happy. The man might tell me that he has been happily married for 25 years and that his wife is absolutely fine with the mistress. He will ask me what the problem is when every one is content and no one is getting hurt?\n\nAnd it can be hard to argue with this point. But I often suspect that the wife probably isn't as happy as he believes. And to me, a marriage can only be defined as \"good\" if it is indeed good for both people. How good can it be for you if you know that your spouse isn't faithful? This is only my opinion and I admit that my opinion is partially formed by being a wife who was cheated on.\n\nThe bottom line to me is that infidelity isn't always a definite sign that your marriage was completely awful or fatally flawed. People can and do cheat when they are happily married, but they are reacting to their own personal struggles. However, with that said, you must understand that once the cheating happens, the marriage is damaged and must be repaired. There is usually no going back to the way things were, even if the marriage truly was a good one. It is so important to identify what possibly went wrong and then to fix it, especially if you want your marriage to be good once again.\n\nI did believe that our marriage was a reasonably good one before my husband's affair. However, once he crossed the line, it was no longer good for me",
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      "body": "Dear friend, you do not appear to be following @wafrica. Follow @wafrica to get a valuable upvote on your quality post! ",
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      "body": "https://steemitimages.com/DQmaFaVLPnsb5bNpWCtCLuxpJiKyeqtFZYpCRBGVu7KkQbc/123.jpg\n\n[source](https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Marriage-Counseling-Doesnt-Work-Anymore&id=1264381)\n\n\n**I am so excited to be writing this to you and also hear views Why you think Marriage Counseling Doesn't Work Anymore**\n\nYou never thought it would happen to you. But now here you are today... faced with the most important decision of your life.\n\n>>No matter what circumstances led to the current condition of your marriage, all that doesn't matter anymore. All that matters now is that you need to find a solution to your marriage problems. You desperately want to keep your family together, but the problem is - you want a solution that works.\n\n**Most people think that when marriages take a turn for the worst; the only solution is marriage counseling.**\n\nBut when you turn to marriage counseling, the focus is on behavior, action and doing. And in fact, it's very possible that you could DO all the tips, techniques and offered to you by your marriage counselor, yet still wind up unhappy and frustrated with each other. Why?\n\nPastor and international marriage expert, Mark Gungor's has one of the best answers I've seen. He makes a wonderful point that we just don't hear enough. Here's what he said:\n\n\"If your view of marriage is flawed, all the energy and strategy you are using (such as our marriage will be better if we just do this or change that) will end in failure...you must work on your marriage BECAUSE you believe it IS valuable, not because you are trying to make it valuable.\"\n\nDid you know that most marriage counselors do not believe your marriage IS valuable? Many of them have already divorced, so why would they see your marriage as any more valuable than their own?\n\nThey believe marriage is simply expendable and that the kids will be ok. They hold the belief that not all couples are meant to be together which is why they are so quick to give up on your marriage.\n\n>>Now I know I'm making a generalization about ALL marriage counselors and I do realize that there are some \"renegade\" marriage counselors who do not follow these beliefs. But based on the countless \"horror stories\" from the couples I've worked with over the years, these counselors are few and far between.\n\n**What kind of \"horror stories\" you ask? Good question.**\n\nI know this may be difficult to believe, but many of the couples I've worked with over the years who have attended marriage counseling told me that their marriage counselor actually advised them to DIVORCE!\n\nThese couples attended marriage counseling because they wanted to save their marriage, not hear from an \"expert\" that their marriage is hopeless!\n\nIn fact, there have been statistics recently that stated 80% of marriages that end up in divorce could have been saved if the couple had only received the proper help they needed.\n\nAnd as time goes on...while our divorce rate continues to remain at 50%, the truth about marriage counseling is increasingly gaining more exposure with new alternatives to marriage counseling popping up all over the net.\n\nNow the REAL question you must ask yourself is this...\n\nIf the two of you don't believe your marriage IS valuable, and worth doing every positive thing you can to make it healthy again (marriage counseling not in the list), then what hope can you have for your marriage?\n\nThe reason couples end up in the offices of marriage counselors is because they want somebody to help them do what they're not able to do... believe their marriage IS valuable. Talk to virtually any couple who has been to a marriage counselor and you'll find them in agreement.\n\nBut the sad truth is that most marriage counselors just don't believe marriage itself IS valuable.\n\n**What all this boils down to is this:**\n\nMarriage Counselors need to take a good look at their massive failure rate and realize that they're doing more harm than good.\n\nUltimately, the real reason for their failure to save marriages may have something to do with their initial schooling and education.\n\n**Most people don't know this, but marriage counseling as taught in universities isn't marriage counseling at all. It's therapy for individuals.**\n\n80% of all private practice marriage counselors in the U.S. say they conduct marriage therapy, yet only 12% are in a profession that requires them to take EVEN ONE course on dealing with couples, (Dr. William J. Doherty, Minneapolis MN)\n\n**As a result, they prefer to work with each person individually, instead of as a couple.**\n\n**So my advice to you is...**\n\nIf you're considering seeing a marriage counselor, take this as your alternative view. If your marriage problems persist, you're far better off with a weekend marriage seminar or a marriage coach than a marriage counselor.\n\nIn fact, do a quick search in Google for \"alternative to marriage counseling\". What you'll find is a variety of solutions that don't involve marriage counseling. And very often these alternatives are less expensive, less invasive and not at all emotionally draining - much unlike what you might find in traditional marriage counseling.",
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      "body": "https://steemitimages.com/DQmaFaVLPnsb5bNpWCtCLuxpJiKyeqtFZYpCRBGVu7KkQbc/123.jpg\n\n[source](https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Marriage-Counseling-Doesnt-Work-Anymore&id=1264381)\n\n\n**I am so excited to be writing this to you and also hear views Why you think Marriage Counseling Doesn't Work Anymore**\n\nYou never thought it would happen to you. But now here you are today... faced with the most important decision of your life.\n\n>>No matter what circumstances led to the current condition of your marriage, all that doesn't matter anymore. All that matters now is that you need to find a solution to your marriage problems. You desperately want to keep your family together, but the problem is - you want a solution that works.\n\n**Most people think that when marriages take a turn for the worst; the only solution is marriage counseling.**\n\nBut when you turn to marriage counseling, the focus is on behavior, action and doing. 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