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      "body": "以前我總覺得這個世界很無聊，很少有事情可以讓我提起勁。來更準確的說我覺得這世界多我一個不多，少我一個不少，覺得自己沒有影響力，存在的價值稀薄。還有了輕生了念頭，但是怕痛，不敢動手所以還活著。現在理解到不是這個世界無聊，而是我本人無聊。打電動、玩遊戲也好、培養象棋、圍棋、彈吉他、德州撲克等等興趣也好，我從來沒有超過半年專心培養一個興趣或技能過。\n\n學習或練習的過程中總是在爬過幾個小山頭我就轉移目標了，因為要再往下練實在太辛苦了，繼續的話顯得我原來沒有自己想像的那麼棒，沒法三兩下就學會。所以趨勢跟長期的觀念在我腦中根本不存在，所以我都挑馬上就有成果的事情來做。\n\n因為有強烈的想變富有的心態，這樣的心態下讓我在第一份工作賠上了家產，真的是往錯誤的方向效率越高死得越慘。因為當時不曉得不能用借來的錢投資，不曉得用無法判定無期徒刑的錢做投資是很危險的。後面想要靠做生意翻回來卻越賠越多，因為我沒有足夠的技能，也沒有判斷市場的能力。在後面的幾年我非常的焦慮，債務是我欠下的，但還債都是父母在還的。因為每個月的貸款超過我去外面上班的薪水，所以我打死都不出去上班，甚至覺得出去上班是傻的，我的時間跟精力不應該花在那上面。跟自己說只能靠做生意翻身了，所以都待在家裡研究。\n\n越是焦慮判斷能力越差，判斷能力差就會進入錯的市場，進入錯的市場越想快速回本就賠越快，做哪個項目就賠哪個項目。好不容易有項目賺錢了，卻因為當初的銷售行為違反該公司的政策，導致客戶利益損失，只好硬是把到口袋的錢都賠還給客戶了。\n\n還不了錢，賺不了錢，時間逐漸流逝，剩下滿是後悔的我，和虧欠父母的內疚。就在今年接觸到了-被討厭的勇氣-一書對我產生了非常巨大的影響，讓我意識到原來不出去工作，不是無法還債的原因，原來是我害怕出去面對社會，怕自己原來沒想像中的那麼棒，想要跟人家不同最簡單的方法就是別人都在上班我就偏要搞創業。該書讓我意識到原來我賴在家裡不出去工作是因為這樣比較輕鬆，雖然負債是父母在還的讓我愧咎，但至少我不用辛苦出去工作來還債，還讓我意識到自己很多驚人的想法導致的做法。\n\n也還好意識到了就有機會改變，於是我開始嘗試走回職場，在新的勇氣產生的動力下產生一連串的原因讓我有機會在四月底接觸到了邏輯思維-得到的這項產品，接觸到時是多麼的興奮阿，原來這世界上還有那麼牛的一群人，掙扎了一陣子就把之前跟朋友借錢在淘寶上的押金轉出來買專欄，一口氣買了七個專欄。\n\n每天學習7個專欄到每天學習3個專欄到每天只學習1個專欄，是哪個應該不用解釋吧。雖然學習不到一年的時間，算一算也才快3個月。但我從透過學習改變思維，透過思維改變態度，透過態度改變行為，硬生生活成了不同命運的人。我做了以前絕對不會做的事情，想活在未來就選擇未來的主要環境，想進入大數據的世界開始學習程式語言python，也想著之後透過python在國外找到工作而且很多文章也都是英文，所以也開始自學美語。看了專欄覺得只看是不夠的，看過會忘於是就寫留言。要寫留言就會鍛鍊到基本的寫作，鍛鍊到寫作乾脆一起鍛鍊演說能力吧，於是開始錄自己的心得。因為有了長期的概念，想留點東西給子孫輩看看，看你爺爺當年有多差，哈哈。長期的概念也意識到想要活的久一點，操作系統也就是精神力量雖然很重要，但承載操作系統的硬體也就是肉體也很重要，也就開始健身了。\n\n既然這些都是要做的，那乾脆把我是怎麼透過學習變成不同人的過程記錄下來吧。於是開始每天拍視頻記錄自己學到的東西，就開始幻想要是以後別人問我是怎麼變得那麼牛就一言不和甩連結，哪裡牛不就是每天進步一點嗎？\n\n我是張小雄，來自臺灣的戰友。每天拍影片記錄自己的學習，你可以透過youtube搜尋張小雄，翻不了牆也可以搜尋我的blog：http://lifeofbear.com/ 。  希望可以激發你學習的動力，我們共同通往財富自由之路。",
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