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      "body": "![IMG_20170904_114447_533.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmU7smazghS3LfF3mP8VTggkxo1BxETwa8twvLfFuq75Xt/IMG_20170904_114447_533.jpg) \nI sat there and I heard what he said, I just didn’t think it was really happening to me.  My ears were ringing, my heart was pounding and the tears were ready to fall – and not because I was sad, but because I was just so angry… and I couldn’t utter a darn word.  The words that were being said completely changed my life!  At the time I thought it was the worst thing that could have ever happened – turns out it was the BEST thing he could have done for me! Want to know what those words were? Here goes:\n\nYou are only getting a 2% increase and I decided to not pay you a bonus, because I don’t think you deserve it.\n\nHe went on to tell me that my job title changed and revoked my access to the system and and and all the other bullshit.  I was off sick for 3 weeks and I think that may have also been a nail in my coffin.\nI DON’T DESERVE IT?  Let me tell you about ‘deserve’ it!\nI was asked to stand in for a colleague who went on maternity leave and gladly did it for the experience – I got no payment, overtime, no thank you not even a f*ck you! Including my own darn work.\nI was studying as well at the time and got no study time because it was an online course\nI was booked off sick for 3 weeks and upon my return got no ‘are you ok’ – I did get a warning – kick me when I’m down!\nI was the one who would volunteer to stay late when there were deadlines – you know because that is what a team member does.\nI was the one who remembered everyone’s birthday and would go out and get treats to make them feel special.\nThese are only a few things – I can remember.\n\nI DON’T DESERVE A BONUS!\n\nI gracefully declined the 2% increase and decided to be f@cking brave and fight.  After countless hours of consultations and grievance procedures and just disgust – it hit me.  Like a ton of bricks – and I heard my voice whisper:\nAzele, if you don’t deserve a bonus then this place and it’s people DON’T DESERVE YOUR EFFING TIME!!! In that moment my life changed.  That was it.  My family deserved my time and ALL of me, not just the left overs of me and my bad moods.  So I resigned and was gone a month later.\n\nWas I scared? Of course. No income. No job. No more social life. No more reckless spending. Was I excited? Yes! With the support of my amazing husband and kids, I finally got to know ME.\nI knew that I did not want a 9-5 job\nI knew that I needed to fail and succeed and it wasn’t going to be easy\nI became a business partner of an amazing MLM company and met amazing like-minded people and got to enjoy a few international vacations in less than a year!\nI started 2 more business opportunities and at first it failed and I was devastated and then thought that perhaps I needed to go back to work and build someone else’s damn dream. With each failure and disappointment, I became stronger and surrounded myself with people who had what I wanted.\n\nI run 5 businesses and took advantage of every opportunity and a year and a half later – here I am sitting on my couch and building an online empire, all because I took a chance and got up every time I got knocked down.  Realising that people don’t know what they don’t know and think that you are crazy and believe me when I say, the people closest to me, are the ones who didn’t really believe in me. Some even ridiculed the legality and told me to get a real job.  Then there are people who just ignored me. I am so confident in my product and progress – it doesn’t really matter what people think and I am not in the convincing business – I just figured that since I have been through it, I could pay it forward and change someone else’s life! \nSo while the majority of the people are at a job which they hate and earning a salary they hate and living for a Friday and the next 48 hours…\n\nI am the mommy blessed to be\nOn the hockey field for every practice and every game\nAt the gymnasium with my son and right in the front at his competition when he gets gold\nAt all the music concerts and guitar lessons\nTake my daughter to dance classes and competitions\nEncouraging the kids at swimming classes\nRandom beach and ice cream trips after school\nAt every eisteddfod\nAt every mathematics competition and a proud mom as my daughter receives her prizes\nAt every school assembly when my kids receive awards – academic and sport\nI get to fetch my kids from school EVERY day and spend time with them\nI can design my own life and build a dream from my cell phone armed with wifi.  Yes it was not easy and at times I do feel like giving up – and then I am reminded of those words “you don’t deserve it” and I get up and say YES. YES YOU DESERVE THE BEST LIFE.  YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.  YOU DESERVE IT ALL – BUT MOST OF ALL – YOUR CHILDREN DESERVE EVERYTHING AND ALL OF YOU!\n\nNetwork marketing is here to stay and the longer you wait – the more time you lose.  It is not a get rich quick business.  I work my a$$ off and I pray every single day.\n\nI do have to pause here and say THANK YOU to an amazing woman, Theola Jacobs - you were always there when I was ready to give up, giving me a hug and encouraging me at your kitchen table! I am forever blessed.\n \nThe day I fired my boss – was the day I started ‘living’",
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      "body": "![20170202_151247.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWzzeWpM7hLFhXMqvTcacbb2zRX5J8HZTcG4HqU3V2Hm5/20170202_151247.jpg)\n\n Just conjure up this image - with your mind's eye, see a dark musty library. Those typically found in really old homes, with dark walls, hoary cobwebs and high ceilings, a little fireplace, a cold squeaky uncomfortably over-sized leather couch and the smell of a freshly lit cigar and brandy. Rows and shelves filled with many tales - a spectacular collection of arcane books and some even written in Latin... Well, that is what my brain currently looks like... the memory side of my brain. A mess.\n\nOn our usual wearisome drive to school yesterday, I asked – no one in particular –to please remind me, that I need to buy milk. Immediately, as if Griffin was waiting for this opportunity for months, very bluntly delivered the statement. “Mom you don’t remember anything, you are an adult, why must we ALWAYS remind you.”\n\nMy immediate reaction would have been, a venomous spewing answer – but I had to snuff it before it even made it past the seal of my lips… Just picture it… a woman behind the wheel of her mommy car, arms flailing, head spinning around on her shoulders, fire coming out of her mouth, eyes as wide as two red hot coals (hot enough to burn a hole right through his forehead)  and her foot HEAVY on the accelerator and seemingly half crazy talking to herself in the rear view mirror.  I had to just breathe and reply as calmly as I could…\n\nGriffin Bailey (I started, making sure that he heard both names – laced with that mom-is-a-little-‘unhappy’ tone).  Let’s start again.\n\nGriffin Bailey, all mom's parts were in good working order and a fantastic memory before I became a wife and a mommy… Now mommy has to not only think for herself (note I use HERSELF, because this answer is universal and EPIC), but for you, your sister and your dad! Therefore she cannot keep two thoughts in her head on a good day.  By the time mommy has emptied her head (by 5% only) at the end of the day, when everyone is asleep, she just cannot even remember her name, her age or even which day of the week it is! So my love;\n\nYour pets would have been in heaven two days after they came home, if this mommy didn’t remind you every (insert the f world here in your head) day to feed them and clean the cage – sometimes I don’t even bother, because I am only allowed 1 high blood pressure tablet a day, and I do it myself.\nYou would have had to go to your friends parties empty handed, if mommy forgot to buy a gift.\nYou would have been the stinky boy in your class, if mommy didn’t remind you to wash your hair and BEHIND your ears.\nMommy has to remember:\nGriffin has an oral\nGriffin needs a red monami (f*ck - always a red one)\nGriffin needs a new pair of shoes because the current pair tried to kick down the wall at school\nGriffin needs new gymnastics tights, because he is now moving onto apparatus\nGriffin needs a new hardcover book because his homework book only has 6 blank pages\nGriffin needs to take the library books back\nGriffin needs to take the classroom towel back to school (the one he volunteered to bring home every (insert the f word here – in your head only) Friday!\nGriffin needs to make a hot air balloon for oral (and mommy glued her thumb to the little basket)\nGriffin needs extra lunch for his class outing on Friday\nGriffin needs to go to the dentist\nGriffin do you have your lunch / homework books/gym bag\nGriffin did you brush your teeth (shouting again)\nGriffin has choir practise on a Tuesday morning at school\nGriffin your bag is still in the car!!!!! (I shout)\nGriffin must remember to bring his jersey home from ma’s house\nGriffin must be up at 06h00 on Saturday for gym competition in Kuils River at 07h30 for warm up\nGriffin needs money for fund raising\nGRIFFIN. GRIFFIN. GRIFFIN.\n\nNow Griffin, that is you.  Don’t even get me started with Phoenix and daddy!!! They each need 32GB - I only have 1.88GB available. \n\nAfter that long explanation, I asked if he understood… how the rented place in my head, reserved for remembering everyone else’s to-do lists, is filled to the brim… he glibly chirped: “I don’t understand… I am only 8 mom…”\nI could actually ‘hear’ the suggestive dots ending that sentence.\n \nUs moms, whether you work from home, or hold down a full time job, the struggle is so real.  I was a working mom, and now, a work from home mom, and both equally draining and often a little thankless.  So after dropping them off – I decided to spoil myself and had a quiet and fantastically du jour breakfast at the nearest coffee shop and I just sat there sipping my steaming hot cappuccino with a giant heap of cream (thick enough to hide in), contemplating that 07h30 conversation and how we as moms need to really put all the obsolete thoughts into a giant sieve. Declutter our minds and hearts of things, feelings, people and situations that does not serve us positively anymore! Just so that we can at least remember which half of the year we are in and keep the last two thoughts in our heads for longer than a second; at least.  So I am going to turn up the wick and, as my grandma once said, “maak vuur onder hul sterte”, restore my erstwhile impeccable memory and sanity. A legend in my own mind.\n\nAt least for a day or 2, before the ‘add to cart’ reactivates. I don't even think that you, once you reach the age of 40, can completely go back to the original factory settings of 1976. Can you?\n\nAnd… if all else fails, I will advertise these 3, in the second-hand section on Gumtree.  \nFREE delivery.",
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      "body": "for sure! Hubby also just told me that it is a good movie. Think i will watch it before bed. Chat soon😊",
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      "body": "you are up for a treat then.. enjoy  :)\ndo share your reviews after you finish watching",
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      "title": "Manes and Banes",
      "body": "“Never underestimate the halo of confidence a freshly coiffed mane brings”.![FB_IMG_1499102146851.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWVrHZCRCk6AB1ehPsRsNqY1tnqdvLXd1SfPfVxt8ZJZb/FB_IMG_1499102146851.jpg)\n\nI read an article a few years ago and this sentence, I have always carried around in my back pocket.  It can be unpacked in so many different ways. So why is this sentence so significant you may ask?  Well since I can go on and on about the why, I should perhaps stick to just 1 or 2, else we could be here until Sunday. \n\nJust as fashions change and seasons change – we change. Why rock the same old boring hairstyle?  Hair is the one thing that is on display every single day and a stunning accessory right? It frames our faces, highlights our best facial features, it can be styled in so many ways, it can be coloured and the list goes on – and I know more often than not, we are not entirely happy with the head of hair we were dealt.  Oh – I was one of them; thankfully, I am so over it and now happily share my eye-rolling adventures and the tales of my tresses.\n\nA haircut is as good a holiday they said.  THEY were wrong. A$$HOLES. (I agree now of course).\n\nSo I showed up in this beautiful world with a brown bush of curls – lovely shiny curls, which my mom tied up in ribbons and they happily bounced around my shoulders and down my back as I played with my dolls and tea set and then later pretended that I was super girl gliding through the sky. As one does when you are five years old – and you think that Jesus and your daddy are the strongest men in the entire world. Those blissful childhood years.\n\nFast forward to 1990 – my first year of high school – where on the first day I realised, ‘Dorothy was not in Kansas anymore”.  Things had changed. Things had to change. I was in a different world, and so I met that pesky little thing called peer pressure. (I wish that they included a paragraph about how to handle peer pressure in the prospectus handed out upon registration! It would have just made the next 5 years better). Here started the love and hate relationship with hair – two horns on the same goat! Here I noticed that if one girl started rocking a particular hairstyle – everyone else had to sport it.  I remember spending hours trying to French braid my hair – until I couldn’t feel where my arms actually joined the rest of my body – but after 3 days and a truckload of f’s, I mastered it. \n\nThen of course – in the early 90’s we didn’t have flat irons – and so when it rained or even worse – those misty mornings, most of us had tightly coiled buns with an arsenal of hair pins. Folks – then came the gel; people understand, the 90’s was ALL about the gel. You guessed it, I was on the gel wagon… and it would take a few tank loads of warm water to wash all the goo out of my hair. Then of course  the sleek shiny locks. For me, it became so ‘real’ when I heard a conversation between two boys in my class… going around the class and discussing hair and what they didn’t like about girls and the one said “I hate when that girl’s hair is untidy in the front and it just sits there… like tree branches…”.   I was thankful at that moment that it wasn’t me and promised myself that it would never be.\n\nWith the college years, come even more challenges… here no one cares what your hair looks like or what you wear – everyone walks around on their own mission.  Here I started experimenting… and brace yourself for the worst hairstyle in the history of the world!!!  I still cringe and break out in a light glistening sweat.  My eyes are watering right now.\n\nIt was 1997 – my 3rd and last year of study and a classmate convinced me that cutting my long hair into LAYERS would be just lovely.  So off I went (without even a second thought or without running the idea up the flagpole) – to a little ‘home’ hairdresser and asked “please cut my hair into layers”… I didn’t say (and how was I to know) long layers, keep the length… she took to my hair with a scissors and with expert haste – the only way I can explain, the cut actually looked like it was cut with pruning shears or even a broken bottle neck and the layers she had in mind – short layers on the top with a long piece left untouched in the back – yes people, I had a mullet… a bad 80’s lion-king-looking hairstyle.  This was before my fortuitous possession of the modern convenience known as the GHD.  When my mom saw me – her look said it all… it would take 54 years for my hair to be normal… When my friend said “that is such a bad hairstyle, I am not going out with you in public”, I knew that it was bad. Had no choice but to let the consequences spill where they will. Irrevocable personified!\n\nNote to my 19 year old self – don’t cut your hair… in winter… when you need to use public transport, on misty mornings… with zero blow drying skills!\n\nIt took about 2 years for it to grow out and boy was I relieved. It felt like I had been released from prison, enslaved by a bad haircut. So in the years to follow, I experimented with all colours. At one point – I had a fuchsia mane… seriously, when the midday sun floodlit my crown chakra, I swear that I could be seen from Jupiter, Saturn and Mars – but I LOVED it! \n\nWho can forget the majestic quandary I found myself in – on the day I had the worst hair day ever… and I am talking about ever! I decided to take a quick trip to the mall – hung over – to get something.  I say something because I just don't remember what. Then as I, less than gracefully, head down the shampoo aisle, I bump into an ex-boyfriend, with his beautiful raven-haired goddess of a girlfriend on his arm… and I just stood there, defensively and with so much self-loathing reach for my inside out party hair which I acquired at the previous night’s foam party where I was the star of the show (and where I was helping Fat Man Scoop sing “put your hands up”, now here I am putting my hands up to hide my scrunched up weak hair line) and hearing my vodka laced voice whisper in my right ear, HOW THE F DID I GET HERE… I WANT TO GO HOME. I SHOULDN’T HAVE COME HERE.\n\nThis image of me will forever have her asking:  “YOU DATED HER”??? (Insert moue here).  I die for days.\n\nSo after my daughter was born in 2005, I was just lacklustre – a disenchanted ingénue.  I decided, to get myself out of my funk, I would do a little colour at home – and I happily read the instructions on the box and decided, to hell with instructions. I will just keep the magic product on for perhaps 10 minutes longer… I had blonde rusty tufts all over and it eventually morphed into orange before breaking off… Sigh – will I ever learn???  \n\nAs time moved me on into my 30’s I became less worried about trying to fit into the ever changing hair trends, and to just be natural. When the time eventually came to make a change that would send me into the next phase – I researched extensively, armed with expert blow drying skills, the most flattering hairstyles and the maintenance thereof, I eventually found a picture of Mariska Hargitay's hair – and I fell in love! So it became my new normal, the new me. I moved forth boldly.\n\nCoco Chanel understood well when she said “when a woman changes her hairstyle, she is about to change her life”.  It is liberating and like all things in life – we live and learn.  Your hair can be your best friend or worst enemy, you have to find the in between and embrace it.  Some days are diamonds and some days are stones; and some days, your life and your hair is being held together with one bobby pin.  Have fun with it nonetheless.\n\nA woman’s bane indeed.",
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      "body": "Congratulations @iamazele! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :\n\n[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/comments.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@iamazele) Award for the number of comments\n\nClick on any badge to view your own Board of Honnor on SteemitBoard.\nFor more information about SteemitBoard, click [here](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)\n\nIf you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word `STOP`\n\nBy upvoting this notification, you can help all Steemit users. Learn how [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)!",
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