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      "body": "Congratulations @hauswife! You received a personal award!\n\n<table><tr><td>https://steemitimages.com/70x70/http://steemitboard.com/@hauswife/birthday2.png</td><td>Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 2 years!</td></tr></table>\n\n<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@hauswife) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=hauswife)_</sub>\n\n\n###### [Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1) to get one more award and increased upvotes!",
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      "body": "I think 2 peeps flagged one of your comments.  With a couple randow posts.... like poetry or a photo you can get back up to a 25 pretty fast I am sure.\n",
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      "body": "What the F?!?  Been waiting and your just gonna tease me like that darling?  \"To be continued\" the literary form of a cock block.  tsk tsk.  You need a spanking.\n\nhttps://i.makeagif.com/media/9-17-2015/Gr3YGp.gif\n\nSo how long am I gonna have to wait for the next installment?  Common now.  Can't keep me waiting ;)",
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      "author": "hauswife",
      "body": "sounds about right",
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      "body": "https://i.imgsafe.org/ac/ac347e7be4.jpeg\n\n<div class=\"pull-left\">https://i.imgsafe.org/13/1344be736b.png</div>\n\nThere's a scene in the television show <i>Big Bang Theory</i> where Howard Wolowitz mentions the plans of his younger self to build two sex robots, a girlfriend and a prostitute. Sheldon asks him why he would need two robots. Howard smiles, coyly. “There are some things you don't do with your girlfriend robot.”\n\nIt was at that moment I realized I would never have the entire heart of a man. And if I wanted a man at all (because this is probably the fork in the road that leads many women into lesbianism), I'd have to choose: do I want to be the girlfriend or the prostitute?\n\nThis split in the male mind can be such an entrenched schism that Freud coined a name for it: the madonna / whore complex. This is the mental disorder at work when a man creates the false dichotomy between two female archetypes: the good/pure/sexless and the bad/brazen/whore. In this disordered mind, no woman can comprise both: the madonna and whore are mutually exclusive. And if some poor woman is foolish enough to marry someone this far gone, she can look forward to a pretty much sexless marriage.\n\nBut all men live somewhere on this continuum, splitting the role of woman into two impossibly separated roles. I chose “madonna” not realizing I was even making a choice. I just thought that's what you do... love a man, be faithful, don't lie to him. I didn't realize all the things a madonna gives up to her whore counterpart. I didn't know there was a whore counterpart. But she's there, either hustling down the street, spread-eagle on the pages of Playboy, or fingering herself on MyFreeCams.\n\nBut thanks to Howard Wolowitz, I was faced with a new choice. So I decided to try it the other way. Let's see what the whore side of life is like. It started with <a href=\"https://steemit.com/story/@hauswife/how-i-became-the-other-woman\">my first online experience in the role of “other woman”</a> and quickly escalated to my first “date.”\n\nI'll call him Curt.\n\nWe met on a website explicitly stating that members were married. Anything going on here would be considered cheating: it's why you came. All up front and the perfect place for me to land.\n\nCurt wanted to meet in a restaurant downtown, away from his neighborhood, he said, away from his work. Understandable. I didn't even know how to get there; that's how often I'm downtown. But my phone came through. Lately my phone has been leading me into a lot of new experiences, just as, I'm sure, it does for my husband.\n\nCurt wasn't tall, but wasn't short, either. Plain, really. He had enough hair, but not thick or combed in any ambitious way. His nose was average. His lips were thin. Nothing special. But sitting across the table from him electrified me in a weird, new way. I wasn't supposed to be there. That simple fact tripped my normally rule-following brain into dropping old scripts and I was free to just sit there, tingling and smiling.\n\nHe looked nervous, eyeing the door. I could tell he was nervous on the phone, planning the date, but wow. This might be more fun. A man I could direct. Maybe I'd take the lead.\n\nCurt raised his glass. “My elbow approves.”\n\n“I'm sorry?”\n\nHe leaned in closer. “My wife doesn't like my elbow. She won't let me use it on her.”\n\nI was beginning to see where this was going. But, what the hell. We went to a hotel down the street and that's when he mentioned that we'd just had dinner on the ground floor of his wife's office building. Did she see us? Was that important to him? Interesting, because I was only excited by the idea that I must, under no circumstances, <i>ever</i> get caught! But, to each his own.\n\nAs it turns out, riding an elbow isn't a bad way to discover your sleazy side. Any climax would have worked for me, and I didn't need the eyeball-to-eyeball intimacy of a man on top. So the elbow worked fine and the elbow worked twice as I faced the anonymous hotel wall, both remembering and forgetting where I was in that moment of building, sudden electricity that filled my abdomen, then shot down my legs like lightning. I'm not entirely sure if it was good for Curt or not.\n\nI didn't care.\n\nThe moan that escaped my lips wasn't for him. And it wasn't to hurt my husband, slouching in front of a football game at home. The moan was for that poor woman who had mistakenly chosen “madonna” and had been left on her own and ignored so many evenings.\n\nIt was for that poor, lonely woman I used to be.\n\nUltimately, I think it boils down to this: a man like my husband really does want to love his wife, but he needs to hold some power over her. That's because he also wants to diddle-finger a whore. And a whore holds power over him. Why? Because she doesn't care about him. Only the wife cares. That gives the whore power and completely strips it from the wife. And a man like this is willing to be one-down to a whore as long as he can be one-up on his wife. It's a trade-off.\n\nWell, now it's my turn to wield the power.\n\n<center><i>...to be continued...</i></center>",
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      "author": "hauswife",
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      "author": "hauswife",
      "body": "That's very open and honest of you to say. I think you and I are motivated to write about this honestly for similar reasons, and yet coming from opposite ends of the problem. I don't think women realize how their sexual indifference can send a man looking elsewhere. But I also don't think men realize how \"just looking\" at porn can kill their romantic relationship in so many ways. It's a sad situation. I'd like to think that \"true love\" can bring couples together over problem issues like sex, but it's usually not the case.",
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      "author": "omanache",
      "body": "I think I am on the very same path as your husband. I am sort of becoming detached from my partner. I will not say it is because she is ugly - it is mainly because we both are on different levels when it comes to sex. I like it slow prolonged with slow movements - I even used to like her sleeping with me inside her. I like the feeling of total contact and being inside. Needless to say she was not that much in to it. Nowadays I feel guilty for making her uncomfortable and at the same time I can't just switch it on and then turn off. I requested her to wear dress of my liking (completely ordinary dress to someone but arousing to me - may be because I used to see girls and ladies in such dresses during my childhood). If it is a lucky year I get to watch her wear it once! Call me a voyeur but I like watching her without she knowing it. Several requests but nothing worked. After long discussions she appears to understand the issue but give it a couple of days - everything is back to where it was.\n\nI do not like alcohol or smoking. I need a way to pleasure myself. So I turn to slow  satisfaction at my own pace. Internet porn. Just search and watch slowly. I am not that much into paid porn yet but I am spending long hours on the internet. Wrote it down so that someone will read and understand how they can loose their partner. Pay attention to your partner's desires please. It may be silly but that will keep him/her happy.",
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      "author": "hauswife",
      "body": "https://i.imgsafe.org/ac/ac347e7be4.jpeg\n\nI married a porn addict, a strip-club regular.\n\nA huge mistake, but I couldn't help myself. I loved him. Still do.\n\nI'm not a stripper. How did I even end up with someone stuck in that world? We met at the library, all very above board. He was 51. I was in my late 40s, divorced from my 20-year marriage and looking for connection. He was too, I think. He said he wanted a “legitimate” relationship. No more strippers. No more body parts. A whole person he could get to know and laugh with and care about. Shop with at the grocery store. Walk with at the park. The problem was, he was addicted to those body parts. After watching properly lit sexual objectification long enough, the brain comes to expect it. Demands it.\n\nAfter the wedding, he was never that into me. Sex in the shower a few times over the course of a year isn't enough for a new wife on her second go-around. And after that first year, intimacy all but ended. We were still best friends. Still laughed together and had fun. We just stopped touching. I blamed myself at first. Tried losing a few pounds to re-spark his interest. Tried yelling. Cold shoulder. Begging, even. That just made it worse. Eventually, he started getting up in the middle of the night, leaving the bedroom for an hour. I'd see the glow of his laptop in the other room.\n\n<div class=\"pull-left\">https://i.imgsafe.org/ab/abf73460ea.jpeg</div>\n\nAt first I was curious. Then obsessed. I snooped and stalked, checking his internet history and watching all the porn videos he'd been watching. I thought it might bring us closer together, on some sort of sexual ethereal plane. It didn't.\n\nI checked his phone for texts. There was nothing there because a man addicted to porn and watching strippers isn't trying to hook up. He's not in it for connection. It's the opposite of that; it's voyeurism. You don't want the woman you're peeping at to suddenly catch your eye.\n\nEventually, I found the website with the live girls on webcam. I could log into my husband's account when he wasn't home. Four hundred thumnails of boobs and butts and spread-eagle crotch. Just click one and they'll jiggle it for you, live. You tip the girls with tokens if they jiggle it hard enough and fast enough and said just the right sweet thing in the chat. My husband was spending money on these girls. Our money. My money.\n\nI wasn't a prude. I like porn myself now and then. Hell, I like sex! And really wanted to be having some with my apparently horny husband. But he was choosing porn over me. His wife. His best friend. The woman he said he loved. I felt less than dirt. And on that top of that, I started to feel ugly.\n\n<div class=\"pull-right\">https://i.imgsafe.org/ac/ac099c1ac1.jpeg</div>\n\nEven worse, though, I was feeling jealous about this other, secret world he lived in and wouldn't invite me into. My curiosity grew. I hated that world, and I hated these girls, what had I ever done to them that they wanted to steal my one shot at happiness away from me? But as much as I hated them and their world, a part of me also wanted to be allowed in.\n\nI finally said something to Chad. I was done. Wanted out. But he begged me not to leave. He said he'd stop. He was nothing without me. But he didn't stop, not completely. And the sad thing was, even if he had, it wouldn't have mattered. He wanted it. He probably did love me. But I didn't satisfy this one need, I couldn't. I wasn't a stripper. I wasn't vapid. I wasn't blond. I wasn't patronizing. I wasn't 26. And most of all, I wasn't <b><i>unavailable</i></b>. I was way too available, and that's not exciting. That's not enticing. As long as they held their power of unavailability over him, his penis belonged to them.\n\nAt some point, something inside me snapped. I was tired of being a good girl. I was tired of being an ignored wife. I was tired of being shut out of this exciting world of sex and power, where men were held at arm's length and grocery stores and ironing boards receded into fairy tale. Reality was now the veil and the lowered blouse. I was so tired of that part of me trapped in my boring suburban, sexless house. I called that part of me the “hauswife.” I hated her. There was so much more to me. I could be enticing. I could jiggle. And I decided to enter this world for myself.\n\nMy first time in an online sex chat, I found myself typing with a married man. It horrified me. But it also felt like sweet, vicious revenge. I loved it and hated it. I imagined his poor wife; he described their sex as vanilla. What did she look like? What was she doing right then, while I was admiring the groin of her husband? Did she hate me? Because I was starting to hate her.\n\nMe: does she know you do this?\n\nHim: no\n\nHim: [naked photo]\n\nMe: that's hot... she doesn't know what she's missing\n\nHis wife embodied that part of myself that I hated. That part of me that got left behind and ignored in our bed in the middle of the night. <b><i>She</i></b> was now the hauswife, and I was the other woman. I was the wink and the wiggle and the unavailable woman in the glow of someone's late-night laptop. I could feel my heart pound for the first time in months.\n\n<center><i>...to be continued...</i></center>",
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