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      "body": "I am sick of everyone telling me\nTo calm the fuck down\nOooor cheer the fuck up.\nIf I had to\nThink\nAbout all the fucks\nIn my ups and downs,\nWell\nI wouldn't be taking your orders.\nI'd be blowing you away and skipping the border.  \n\nI don't want to listen to your\n\"I get how your feeling\"\nOr your\n\"You'll get though this!\"\nWho's to say I won't accept a kiss\nFrom a shotgun,\nDouble barrell.\nDon't be dumb.  \n\nI'd rather\nSit and wonder,\nDoes it\nMake you feel better when I\nGrin like a Cheshire?\nI put on a show\nSo you can\nLean in real close\nAnd tell me to\n\"Forget all the things that hurt you most\" And I'll pretend to be ingrossed\nYou'll lean back and sigh too loud\nCome out with something like\n\"Get your head out the clouds\"\nOr\n\"Hang out with a new crowd\"\nOr\n\"You can turn your life around!\"\nOh well,\nWhile I'm at it,\nWhy don't I;\nWin the national lottery,\nTake up artistic pottery,\nLead a bank robbery\nAnd say shut up\nTo your half-arsed commentary.",
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      "permlink": "re-bethyi-my-name-is-beth-and-i-want-to-die-20170610t074959590z",
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      "body": "swolesome: \"Find people and things you want to wake up for and surround yourself with them.\"\n\nTHIS. For the love of humanity (but especially yourself), Beth, THIS. So many people have got no earthly idea just how much this really does mean, not just for those who are suffering like you are, but for us ALL. Things that we love, to live for. Not because anyone else thinks they're important, but because we love them, and they're important to US.\n\nIt's like what happens if you drop one tiny pebble at a time into a pitcher of water. Each pebble causes a little more water to run out, till finally there's pretty much no water left. Now replace the word \"water\" with  the word \"misery.\" The positive things... your card-making, scrapbooking and so on... are the pebbles. Keep throwing more in as you find them, and one day you may wake up and look at your life, and find it so changed for the better that your old thoughts may begin to change also. It's like life handing you lemons, and you trading it in for a mountain of chocolate.\n\nWe need those positive things. All of us do.\n\nSent up a prayer for you, in any case.",
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      "permlink": "re-bethyi-therapy-works-for-some-sometimes-20170610t055414731z",
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      "body": "I saw your first post before I was actually approved, so I couldn't reply, then. But glad to see you write again!\n\nHope you stick around, and never, ever give up! Things can get better, but sometimes it has to happen one very tiny step at a time.\n\nTake care, and hope things get better for you, soon!",
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      "title": "",
      "body": "Congratulations @bethyi! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :\n\n[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/firstpayout.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@bethyi) You got your First payout\n[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/payout.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@bethyi) Award for the total payout received\n\nClick on any badge to view your own Board of Honnor on SteemitBoard.\nFor more information about SteemitBoard, click [here](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)\n\nIf you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word `STOP`\n\nBy upvoting this notification, you can help all Steemit users. Learn how [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)!",
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      "body": "Upvoted. Therapy saved my life as well.\nWelcome to Steemit!",
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      "body": "Hi Beth. Just wanted to thank you for being so open about your feelings.  The Bible says though our heart can deceive us.  The Bible says in John3:16  that \"  for God so loved the world that he gave his only  begotten Son, that who so ever believeth in him , should not perrish, but have everlasting life \". God has a Wonderful plan and purpose for every individual life... including yours!  The first step is seeing our need for a Savior.   If u want to talk more I'm going to follow u.",
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      "body": "MMM! Thank you for this post. Thank you for your honesty. I often feel like this as well. As soon as we can start talking about it we can support each other.",
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      "body": "I'm glad it's working for you :)  Have you ever listened to ASMR videos?  So relaxing.  And sometimes I like the ones with the affirmations as well.  It seems like something you might like and benefit from and I can suggest some if you want.  [Here's a post I did on it a couple weeks ago](https://steemit.com/health/@goldenroom/r-e-l-a-x-a-t-i-o-n-in-the-form-of-asmr-what-s-asmr-inquire-within).",
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