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      "body": "I have cut the vegetables, started boiling the meat and the orisi risi. It was all getting to shape. Humph, I sighed as I wiped the sweat from my brows. The kitchen was warming up and the aromas are prepared for their debut. The stock fish was washed alongside the crayfish, smoked fish, dried okporoko, ponmo, etc. the stock cubes, and all the various spices alongside the ground crayfish. My kitchen was scattered but in the good sense of scattered. The aroma of the boiling meat and co started escaping their confinement into the freedom that is my kitchen and my nostrils. I took a peak at the cookery book in my iPad and was satisfied with what I’d done so far. Don’t get me wrong, I can make a perfectly sweet egusi, but you gotta spice it up every once in a while and that’s what I’m doing that, I’m so psyched. Everything was set. Behold, the beginning of the ‘ nine lives ’ efo riro. \n![IMG-20180731-WA0005-1.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRjKBURDQc4i9DULxm8GHnhVkk4VnYdiwDoJaz8C643u9/IMG-20180731-WA0005-1.jpg)\n            I put the palm oil on fire and suddenly heard my phone ringing, I decided to reduce the heat and go get the phone in the sitting room. It’s Tunde, my husband and the one I’m doing all these for. See, he’s getting back today from his business trip and so he started giving me instructions on what to do in expecting him most of which I’d done, boy! Was I proud of myself or what? He had to go and so promised to call back and as soon as I dropped the call, the kitchen erupted in flames and in my haste to get there I tried tossing my phone on the sofa. Now don’t blame me, in such an emergency situation, only a few people will know what to do but, my mind was just shouting water, water!! Or maybe I was, I can’t remember. So I went and carried a bowl of water to the fire with the hope of extinguishing it but for whatever reason the devil has planned, it escalated pretty quickly. The fire started spreading and I rushed to get my phone and call the estate fire service only to realise the phone fell into the fish tank in the sitting room and was broken. I was done and the only thought on my mind was, ‘is this how I’ll burn my husband’s house down?’ the next thing I heard was griiiinnnngggg from the phone the broken phone and then I woke up.\n      It’s Tunde, giving me the exact instructions and the tab showing the cookery book at exactly the egusi page. Not today Satan!! That got me scared and distracted. Is the universe telling me something? His voice calling my name brought me back to reality and I quickly answered what him to repeat what he was asking and he said, ‘so what are you making for me or is it a surprise?’ the next thing I heard myself saying was ‘no, it’s no surprise just something simple, fried potatoes with the sauce’.\n![IMG-20180731-WA0004-1.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmWK1PEdH1B9UUxyexoRe78T1wo6fnzVpNetbYuuFk5VXY/IMG-20180731-WA0004-1.jpg)\n\nPhoto credit: Google Images \n\nSorry for the late update. I update faster on www.euniceayan.blogspot.com\n😙",
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      "title": "Most Eligible Nigerian Bachelors ❤",
      "body": "![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-07-59-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmcAy4EzRTXotWDWhyrK6mpNGCyZvDeTaGtiPPTAZ2kMKv/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-07-59-1.png)\n   This is me making history. In two years' time or more, you would either  thank me for making this list or blame themselves for not seeing it on time. Just joking😂.  This is the most eligible Nigerian Bachelors list!! This list will not be numbered as they can only appeal more to you based on personal  preference. There are three types of money: \na. Old money: this in nigeria, refers to the 1960s. Legit politics money, agriculture and agro-based products and education  (when education still paid).\nb. New money: loot, petroleum, etc\nc. Emerging money: ICT, sports, entertainment,  etc.\n          Trust me to get you intelligent, handsome 😍 and rich (from one or more of these types of money)- that, my dear, is eligibility. \n        ANTHONY JOSHUA: this guy towers at 6ft 6in, with a body that is to die for. Brother Femi (although with the name of a f*ck boy) is British by nationality, Nigerian by blood. Girls, you can sooooo tap this. And, he is good at what he does (emerging money). Ain't no  stopping him.\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-10-35-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVXtE2vfdJnjchNBX1uEyghxEUWmjJ3HXsyrXWrPDSEWy/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-10-35-1.png)\n   ALEXANDER IWOBI: this name has been here for quite a while but is just getting the attention it deserves. 6ft 1in tall and a handsome football player. This is definitely another example of emerging money and maybe a little of  new money😉. This is one hot guy you have to look out for. You can thank me later.\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-47-26.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRMMgfkzZXpahkiZuenNQp799xe6gyTvqg8f6EmDmzYeo/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-47-26.png)\n   LYNXXX: Chukie Edozien, fresh, handsome, tall and definitely a member of the beard gang. Amazing vocals and one from old money with his father being a former deputy governor of old Bendel State. This one is a \"take-home-to-mama\" material.  He can rock the Agbada as well as well as the suit, Husband material 100 yards loading...😂\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-39-27-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQma7kBJwsJspenYUKvsf6qHGzQVoAoMF2kJqCVPrrAfatF/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-39-27-1.png)\n      TIMINI EGBUSON: this guy just came and swept our hearts away. From media personality to being an actor. We can't get enough of this guy, he's fresh and damn is he fine or what? Get yourself  a \"tinini\" as aunty jenifa would call it and you're good to go. Definitely emerging money.\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-26-27-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmSLb1NyYhgbzjh8KNt79RVHaLSfaan6dr899cyC3HXZ1V/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-26-27-1.png)\nAYOOLA AYOLOLA: He has not stopped touching our hearts since winning project fame west africa season 5. An actor, singer, ladies what else do you want? This one na chocolate, tall, dark and handsome, our Mide. Omo to bahd.\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-28-11-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmea4d239sPLcZkH5QL8WoHYQeeLr18BsQDzUZu78jhVXE/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-28-11-1.png)\n     FALZ THE BAHD GUY: ladies and gentlemen,  this is not a drill, we are here to present to you the intelligent, handsome, funny and ultimately the baddest, Folarin Falana aka falz the bahd guy (how many people read it like falz was speaking? ) c'est le moment we've all been waiting for. Definitely from old money and into emerging money. If you're looking for an intelligent guy, look no further and snatch falz off the market.\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-38-26-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbi9GDdWKiARopwnbGRWFM8AGpYVoqtF6YkRWSVoCTWwh/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-38-26-1.png)\n    PRAIZ: Praise Adejo aka praiz is that singer that knows how to subtly put ideas in our heads with his wonderful voice like melts the heart like hot chocolate. This guy even has a praise adejo day in minnesota. This guy is not planning to stop. He's  the perfect serenade. Ladies, halt!! For we have found ourselves, the ones😂\n\n![Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-30-24-1.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmQSRH7MY1WutKiUHX1c5WXhVApHx4MtKVm7LzJTKQUbN9/Screenshot_2018-06-30-18-30-24-1.png)\nSeven names and seven portraits speaks perfection and these men are nothing short of that. I hereby declare these men eligible and ripe for harvest.😊",
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      "author": "ayeunice",
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      "title": "Surprise! Surprise!!",
      "body": "![Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-41-21.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmaqXihMqqY8A2VwbHstnV8WibDWCvNzcf5pmdDgXg4Uh8/Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-41-21.png)I had to coerce the gateman. I didn’t come this far to fail. I had earlier begged my oga to give me a day and half off. Imagine me, I left my office midday on Thursday just to make it to the park early especially since I had to get some stuff at the market. And by some stuff, I mean fish (special fish) all those big ones ehn, fresh vegetables, some pepper and all the other ingredients for seven life efo riro. I had to get in early especially since I couldn’t cook it from home. At the park nko, the sweat, load and discomfort. Finally there, one gateman will now tell me not to enter, Na lie! I used lady tricks ni. Finally finally sha, he sha allowed me enter the estate. As soon as I enter nko, I called Femi, my boyfriend. Now about Femi, he is not the average Yoruba demon. Everyone knows Femis are very promiscuous, but not mine, the exception in a thousand. Sha sha, I called him and he told me he was still at work at will call me back. Imagine., at this time, it’s very late and he didn’t even give me chance to tell him about my visit but then again, na him sabi. He’ll meet me here. I know he sounds unbelievable but he has given me a key prior to this time, but I’ve never used it, what can I say? I’ve been busy. I just hope he’s not changed the locks because that one na wahala o. As if on cue, my phone rings and its Tiwalade, my bestie. Tiwalade has been quite unlucky in love and so I try as much as possible not be all lovey dovey when around her. She once dated this one guy, cool guy I heard but the break up was messy and by messy I mean attempted homicide messy that she had to run for her life and has since lived low key life. Back to my diary entry jare, his house is pristine, I mean what guy keeps a crib this clean? Mama is proud of you, boy. I drop the things and now my arms have rest. I then proceed to tour the house since this one has refused to come back from work on time. The first place I entered was the visitor’s toilet, then the guest room and an empty closet, I mean what was I expecting? Then the kitchen, dining, and the master’s bedroom. You know how it is in the movies when they catch the boyfriend cheating, I won’t lie I was scared I will be surprised myself but God is god, testimony time!! I kukuma jejely laid down on the bed and before I knew it, I slept off. What woke me up is something I wish I didn’t have to see.\n![Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-45-25_1527927969728.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmTmoba45CkAHm8suMLD2Ymd4JLmQGYuAEjGfrPLp48aYm/Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-45-25_1527927969728.jpg)         I don’t think they saw me but I saw them alright, my Femi, wait sef, Femi, coming out of the bathroom with Sharon, his secretary. A part of me wants to unsee it while another part of me thanks God, I haven’t cooked the efo riro. So my nightmare was in the only place I didn’t tour and I was sleeping right there. Looking around now, I see his closet is slightly ajar and that seems out of place in this kind of setting. So this is the job. On a different note, it’s good to have a praying mother, I guess all those prayers of God’s guidance have found their way to me. I feel unnaturally calm. Take it from me, I believe this is the calm before the storm ‘cause I know myself and I’m not gentle, if I do say so myself, but God is good. Hallelujah!! He doesn’t want me to go to jail ‘cause frankly, that shade of prison blue will not look good on me. I should have known the whole cleanliness attitude was just a front. I won’t lie, I don’t even know how I walked to the sitting room, put my stuff in the guest room, changed into something comfy and came out only to see them both sitting down. ‘I have two things to ask of you Femi one, don’t let any harm come to the gateman, please don’t let him lose his job and second, can I have Indomie, its late and I need to eat and sleep, thanks’. I didn’t wait for a reply and just went to the kitchen, made myself a good bowl of comfort noodles and went to the sitting room, switched on TV and watched me some bad ass movies. Unfortunately for them, a review of acrimony was going on, thinking about it now, it must have sent a bad message to the both of them. I was forced to chat with Tiwa about my current situation. She sha kept saying, ‘don’t do anything o! I hope you’ve not done anything o! eh! Please, should I call? Are you ok?’ all I said was ‘I don’t know’.![Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-50-53.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmaA22imGB459avcBBRsDJkU2QdsC8KU8riWXpNF8Nivu2/Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-50-53.png)         Later at night, I went to sleep but made sure I locked the door and even put a chair behind it. You don’t sleep on a bicycle, well, my sister once did but that’s story for another day. Morning couldn’t come fast enough especially for me to leave this hell but apparently what fate had in stock for me was way worse. Thank God I already took the rest of the week off, it gives me time to nurse my heartbreak. I kuku brought the ingredients back home, made the efo while crying. Later in the day, Tiwa came straight from her work to help me and she brought ice cream, I did all house chores to help relieve stress and we binge watched movies until I fell asleep. The next day, I was still in slacks when policemen came to meet me for questioning. Sharon was dead. She was found dead in her apartment in the early hours of Friday and was suspected to have died from poisoning. The gateman of that day told the police that he always thought Sharon was the girlfriend until I came and that I may have done something. I was taken in for questioning as well as Tiwa who was my alibi and I was there for many hours until they eventually let me go. On my way out I met Femi and sincerely, it was neither the time nor place to be angry, we had murder on our hands. He attempted to talk but I will have none of it. While I met with Femi, Tiwa met Tony, the murderer ex. That was how an impending murder added to our problems.![Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-47-58.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmXukAZk8Ukjced7pXjB29GqhYFfN2ctSnGjfYHdssDJpi/Screenshot_2018-05-26-17-47-58.png)At this point, I sincerely agree that dating, hell meeting Femi was a mistake. Meeting Tony here definitely means that Tiwa will consider relocating again and I can’t afford to lose my best friend especially at a time like this, she is my support system. So I advised her to go back into the police station and officially report Tony. Tony was made to sign a document stating that he would be held responsible if any harm comes to her but hey we all know the heart of man is evil and desperately wicked, I mean who can know it? It’s no surprise now that Femi is friends with this idiot. Three weeks felt like eternity when we all were called except Tiwa. She told me she was planning on travelling but she hasn’t called me since yesterday and these past few days she’s been off but when your ex who planned to kill you suddenly shows up, it’s bound to happen. I’m worried tho. At the station, we got there to find the inspector telling us about how tony planned to finish the work of killing Tiwa because apparently her knowledge of him is crucial to the case and Tony killed Sharon because she failed to go with the plan. The plan was to dupe and kill Femi, the plan I spoilt with my surprise visit. It never felt so good to hear that your boyfriend cheated on you at his own peril. I even saved the idiot kinda, so much for friendship. Tiwa will finally be safe and Femi and I are never getting back together, the past is gone and buried, but I hope he dies instead of guilt. Oops, did I say that? Well, I visited Tiwa today at the hospital because Tony did a number on her before the police could save her all thanks to her neighbours and all we did was share experiences of worst exes. Being single does not seem so bad anymore. 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      "title": "The psychology of  \"Big brother\"",
      "body": "Big brother is based on George Orwell's nineteen eighty four from Endemol, a company that has made other hit shows like \"Hot in Cleveland\", \"Deal or No Deal\". Big brother is an omniscient eye, a persona that sees everything. The show, \"Big Brother's\"  successs can be attributed to certain qualities.\n1. Anonymity: the idea of anonymity adds  the thrill to the show. We all are made to believe that this person who sees everything in the house cannot himself be seen.\n2. Masculinity: have you ever wondered what would happen if the big brother voice is less masculine or even feminine?  The desired effect the voice adds to the show rests so much in our subconscious that so many of us do not even know how it affects us.\n3. Familiarity: by bringing this show to our doorstep, it makes us feel important.  Also, the voice of each region assumes the accent of that region thus making it more believable. \n      The big brother is more psychological than many of us believe. The big brother is not a person but a group of people, who sit and bring ideas to the table, who tap into our minds and yet make us feel like we're in control.  This write-up is not to \"bad-mouth\" big brother, 'cause that will be highly hypocritical of me since i watch the show too, sometimes. These people understand how the human mind works. By keeping people in a controlled environment for that length of time, we see all of the person. They create characters for the housemates thus unleashing their alter ego e.g Sandra asogwa becomes Alex . We all can be mad, what keeps us sane sometimes is our privacy,  since people can't see us at our lowest point, they still respect us. The \"in-house\" effect as I'll like to call it also make us feel like we are involved in their lives, the technique that other shows such as \"keeping up with the Kardashians\" also employ.\n     Big brother is more of the show than the reality. It is an elaborate mind game that makes us love the housemates enough to give our money to them, be indifferent  enough to believe in the voting process that someone else voted more than we did and hate them enough to attack at the airport. The dress-up, eviction,  tasks, voting gives us the control that big brother never relinquished.  The curiosity for new viewers, the mature content for old ones, the thrill, the drama keeps us glued to our screens thus exercising control over us. The wait before the next ones also adds a sort of suspence in anticipation of the one to come. Big brother ultimately decides  and at this point we realise \"we are nothing but pawns in the hands of big brother\" and still watch the next ones. Image credit: Google images ![IMG_2018-04-24_14-54-03.JPG](https://steemitimages.com/DQmaChSp4XSrfriKd17sMn6dE3jZXaVmpaC6PsXJNg23pAE/IMG_2018-04-24_14-54-03.JPG)",
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