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      "title": "我和蛙的关系，比我和人类的关系都健康",
      "body": "我也养蛙了。\n\n因为我的蛙是全世界独一无二仅此一只的蛙，所以接下来我要用他的名字称呼他。他叫小仙。\n\n小仙是一只沉默的蛙。我知道你们的蛙也一样，不怎么跟你们讲话，也自己干自己的事情，但小仙是我的蛙，所以他和你们的蛙不一样。\n\n我用我们家院子里长出来的三叶草给他换帐篷和食物，摆在他桌上，或者帮他装进包里。他有时候在写东西，有时候做手工，有时候乖乖吃饭，有时候窝在床上看书。\n\n哎呀我有时候真的蛮奇怪的，他到底看的什么书，困得直点头，还是坚持要看。\n![5.gif](https://steemitimages.com/DQmTxzKgNU94BzqsvvHrWx5SiHU6fEyKvdE58fNZai8CVYW/5.gif)\n小仙也和你们的蛙一样，出去旅行的话一声招呼也不打，回来也是。关掉消息提醒的话，我到他家里去看，他是在家还是出门了，那都是运气。\n\n但他出门以后呢，会给我寄他的照片。像所有傻乎乎的游客一样拍了游客照，寄到家里来给我看。还会特地背特产和纪念品回来，即使都是很常见的吃食和小玩意。\n\n是知道我在家里挂念他的。\n\n有人养着蛙，觉得自己养着个儿子，一边养一边理解了自己的妈。其实我不知道养儿子具体是什么感觉，我也还没有想清楚我跟小仙是个什么关系，但我觉得我和小仙之间，真是一种让我觉得很舒适的关系。\n![6.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmRnBe1n4PLcAd51hK1J2nHxWfxe4aHRbHtn3TLbA8QnwY/6.jpg)\n游戏的设置使我和小仙的关系，一开始就处在一种特别健康的模式里。\n\n通常我们认为的健康关系，双方会经常表达关心和爱、保持坦诚（保持坦诚当然不是在说双方在对方面前毫无隐私，而是在指要坦诚地交流情绪和感情，预防不健康的情绪在两个人的关系里滋生），且他们一定在关系中拥有求同存异的能力。\n\n除此之外，健康的关系还有两个很重要的构成要素：\n\n其一是，能自己创造快乐。最健康的关系，不是依赖对方给予快乐，而是两个都能靠自己获得快乐的人，在一起创造更多快乐。\n\n我和小仙，不在对方视线里的时候，也是忙着创造自己的快乐的。\n\n假设小仙是一个真实存在的人，他是我的朋友、我的恋人或是我的小孩，我们的快乐并不完全依赖对方；我不需要每次都确认他在家，或是给我寄回明信片了才觉得快乐，他不需要每天非得赖在我身边，自己一个人去旅行，也很快乐。\n\n在这样的基础上，我对小仙的思念就不是负担，而是我平静生活里锦上添花一般的存在。他给我寄回明信片，也不是每次出行必要的任务，而是他的关心和体贴。\n\n当然亲密的对方会给我们创造很多快乐，但我一直认为最好的关系，最终是会教会个体为自己创造快乐的。没有人有义务永远为别人创造快乐，快乐这件事，最终还是得靠我们自己。\n![7.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmRbJM4tLCroFLNyoJuhK8ymifpBfvwxVKXqF75rcMygyY/7.jpg)\n其二是，保护两个人之间的界限。我们希望在关系里交换关心和爱，希望亲密关系透明坦诚，但毫无界限的介入对方的生活，只会让双方越来越不快乐，最后损害关系。\n\n我和小仙之间的界限感，当然来源于游戏设置。我基本不能决定小仙什么时候去旅行、去什么地方、什么时候回来。这会让我有一种错觉，小仙是有自主意识的，决定这些东西是他的权利，而我要尊重他这个权利。\n\n而小仙也不能管我要用家门前的三叶草给他买什么东西。这一点可就太像母子了，崽崽要出去旅行，妈妈在家里为他准备便当和行囊。\n\n可是这真是一对好棒的母子（即使是由于游戏设置）：妈妈从不拦着想远行的小孩出门，因为担心而会为他在行囊里装上幸运符；小孩想要出去看看世界，但也从来没有忘记在家里等他的人，寄回照片给家里的人看，也总会回家来住一阵。\n\n这是一种令人感到无比舒心的默契。\n\n界限感让我和小仙之间拥有这样的默契（不，其实是游戏设置，我知道的，不要再吐槽了）。有时候人们会以爱之名，否认对方的选择和需要。我们听说过太多过分保护的父母威逼利诱孩子留在身边的故事；我们也听过太多，为了反抗这样的父母，孩子一旦远行就对父母的思念不管不顾的故事。\n\n不止是亲子关系，在朋友和恋人的关系中，界限模糊的状况也经常发生。以“为你好”、“这是爱你”的名义为恋人和朋友做决定，不顾他们真实的需要，为他们决定什么是好，什么是坏。没有界限感，这段关系会失掉尊重，更不可能会有默契了。\n![8.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmanA8gEYhRd2t5HKdQfTZYTac5qPacGE2TMHJPMWZ9tBs/8.jpg)\n在玩这个游戏的这段时间里，因为我和小仙之间这种奇特的舒适感，让我一直在反思我们生活中真实的亲密关系。\n\n我们看过那么多描述亲密关系的作品，它们偶尔会让我们觉得，如胶似漆、惊天动地才是有力量的关系。“我一个人也能很快乐”，“我和你之间需要界限”，这样的话听起来，似乎会让这段关系显得很疏离、很平淡。\n\n实际上，自得其乐和有界限感并不是平淡，而是一种默契。\n\n文艺作者，或者我们每一个普通人，想要描述这些情感的时候，似乎总是害怕把它描述得太过平淡。没错，也许大多数人都不喜欢看平淡的故事，但很多时候，平淡，只是因为作者没有办法在平淡的设定里，写出动人的故事。\n\n什么是动人的故事？其实这款游戏会这么受欢迎，我们已经可以得到答案了。轰轰烈烈动人，倾国倾城也动人，但说不定，在一个阳光明媚的午后，收到挂念的人从远方寄来的一张明信片，其实更加动人。\n![9.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmdZPhWyU2aS9rN8hWkgeBUinY72xrKCVYLm7EjMnP68DA/9.jpg)",
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      "title": "“旧手机换脸盆，换菜刀”响遍大街小巷，它背后有什么秘密？",
      "body": "由于时代不停的发展，科技不断的更新下，手机已经成为大众生活中的\n一部分，也成为了广大消费者日常消费支出的一大要素，说白了，现在买手\n机，就跟逛超市买东西一样简单，这样就导致了，我们谁的家里都会有闲置\n的手机。\n![1.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmYCtpL9vQAaN78C3ujXN7x1h2SsZJSDSEknx7qX2uAUnW/1.jpg)\n          每年能产生多少废旧手机？中国电子装备技术开发协会秘书长唐爱军说，\n“保守估计，我国的废旧手机约有20亿存量，每年以2亿至4亿的增量上涨。”如\n果按一台手机长14厘米、每年产生3亿台废旧手机来算，将淘汰的手机首尾相连\n一字排开，可绕地球一圈。\n         旧手机是我们每个普通人都觉得不\n能用的电子垃圾，也许觉得用它换一个脸盆和菜刀已经很值了！但是旧手机背\n后的利润是相当大的。\n          最常见的利润有几点。\n1.二手手机，这些手机都有不同程度的损坏，但手机里的许多‘内脏’其实还是能\n用的，有人会专门收购这些旧手机然后拆出里面的零件。一些不起眼的手机小\n零件有时候是可以卖大价钱的。我们经常去手机店配一个小螺丝就要三四块，\n或许那就是用我们的洗脸盆和菜刀换来的呢\n![2.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmeRYVcNuX7rrvKfF36N3mDSWrbJXqpbuk66oHwsL6LCSi/2.jpg)\n2、如果手机损坏程度还可以的干脆就翻新一下当成翻新机出售。麻雀变凤凰\n利润一下子就上去了。反正一部旧手机的利润远是脸盆和菜刀的几十倍甚至更\n多！所以才延伸出大街上那么多高价回收旧手机的人。所以他的秘密就是，闷\n不吭声发大财！![4.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWzzjU7oFafjWNjWBtLan1rmCpuD5pNuEcFDb5hVpkrfE/4.jpg)",
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      "body": "<html>\n<p>https://steemitimages.com/DQmQ2dh6u3Zvqv6xAtdaueHcCp3Skthia55JMNQcDn6tUXS/5b4a00002a476cb874de.jpg\n            唐代是一个诗的朝代，诞生了很多有才华的诗人，其中有一些诗人古籍对他们的记载奇少，或者本身在唐朝灿若群星的诗人当中并不算起眼，所以今天很少有人知道他们。古风配图今天要说的就是这样的三位唐朝诗人，很巧的是，他们都姓崔，所以这里开玩笑说他们是老崔家的三兄弟。同样巧的是，他们流传下来的诗作都不多，有人还仅有一首诗歌存世。但最巧的是，他们每人都有一首冠绝古今的诗作，千百年来广为流传!人面桃花相映红!\nhttps://steemitimages.com/DQmXEZ2rDuUVRHrKsuYS7YjB2CboWMv18ZxJtRu2igJxYVv/5b4a000021ea7fadfe04.jpg\n         1、崔护《题都城南庄》去年今日此门中，人面桃花相映红。人面不知何处去，桃花依旧笑春风。崔护仅存诗六首，但这首《题都护南庄》足以让他流芳百世。这首诗写出了“人面桃花”的美丽相遇，又道尽了离别后“物是人非”的怅然若失。!\nhttps://steemitimages.com/DQmUoj6qHqwEaDqP2M7UPkoWuiZwSwA8nGvjwxikK7QvpEf/5b4700027a7021ebf655.jpg古风配图\n          2、崔郊《赠婢》公子王孙逐后尘， 绿珠垂泪滴罗巾。侯门一入深如海， 从此萧郎是路人。</strong>(流行的版本是侯门一入深似海，不合律，所以这里采用的是另外一个版本)崔郊是唐代元和年间的秀才，仅存诗一首，就是这首流传甚广的《赠婢》，写尽恋人迫于现实分离后的命运突转。https://steemitimages.com/DQmdGVAXaBfZ8n1ZJx123duKn8EkEQ8zCxw4fSKRZkh9KbH/5b4400031835af575620.jpg崔颢\n          3、崔颢《黄鹤楼》昔人已乘黄鹤去，此地空余黄鹤楼。!黄鹤一去不复返，白云千载空悠悠。晴川历历汉阳树，芳草萋萋鹦鹉洲。日暮乡关何处是，烟波江上使人愁。崔颢是唐开元进士，《全唐诗》收录他的作品42首。崔颢虽然有诗名，但古籍中关于他的生平事迹记载很少。不过，仅凭这首《黄鹤楼》，也能让世人为之叹服吧!黄鹤一去不复返诗人以诗传世，有好诗千古流传，足矣。!https://steemitimages.com/DQmUmnbk1GEzMtRnScyz9CDZ2Ym6kHsjRPbnHp9k7zBgNSc/5b4a000025ea9487a81c.jpg</p>\n</html>",
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