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| comment | | "parent_author":"",<br>"parent_permlink":"relationship",<br>"author":"mtlryk",<br>"permlink":"the-friendzone-is-a-lousy-excuse-for-sucking-at-relationships",<br>"title":"The Friendzone is a lousy excuse for sucking at relationships",<br>"body":"## Guilt.\n\nMaking other people feel guilty on purpose is probably one of the most egocentric and self-centered act of disrespect known to women and men. Don\u2019t get me wrong; feeling guilty is a common occurence,<br> and it\u2019s important to realize when you screwed up and need to make up for it.\n\nThe main reason why selfish people are helping other people is for others to owe them things. The following statement is easily debatable,<br> but I\u2019ve heard someone say generous people are also helping others out of egocentricity since they take action for them to feel good about themselves. We often hear that nothing is more empowering and rewarding than to lend a hand for free. Never forget that _helping others is also something we do for ourselves_,<br> but that should **NOT** be considered egocentricity.\n\n### People claiming they were friendzoned are completely off-track. \n\nPlaying with one\u2019s emotions is shameful. Profiting from a friend that likes you to acquire things,<br> services and other stuff should be considered heart-rape and should be punishable by the law. Meh. That was a bit hyperbolic but you probably get the point.\n\nIt is so easy these days to blame others for things and situations you don\u2019t have control over. Let\u2019s say you\u2019re a girl,<br> and you have the hots for your lady friend. You both like the same music and movie genres,<br> both like to go out and play Pok\u00e9mon GO at 3AM and both are passionate by space traveling. Only thing is she doesn\u2019t want to bang you have highly emotional intercourse with you\u2013 in fact,<br> she rather have you as a friend.\n\nYou\u2019ve just crossed the last doorstep towards the zone of friendship from which none shall ever escape.\nWhat a bitch,<br> right?\n\n### The Good Guy theory \n\nThis meme was originally created because men are the ones who started ranting on about how they\u2019re self-proclaimed good guys yet get rejected by other girls or guys they hit on.\n\nIt\u2019s funny to think that **Good Guys** (they definitely deserve their bold,<br> capital letters) believe helping friends is worth a torrid night or even a relationship. You often hear these people blame their crush for not liking them back. This is pretty much the same as being in a heavy metal band and blaming audiophiles who listen to classical music for not liking heavy metal. It just doesn\u2019t work like that.\n\n### Let\u2019s make it simpler\n\nSince I\u2019m a sarcastic,<br> condescending nerd,<br> I created a list of all the things you need to do in order to have anyone you demonstratively care about fall in love with you :\n\n* What the crud are you doing?\n* See previous bullet point.\n* Make sure first point it fully understood.\n* Be some kind of love droid with hypnosis capabilities.\n\nYou don\u2019t choose when you fell in love. **You don\u2019t have the power over who you find attractive.** Some people are focused on brain communication,<br> some are more about physical appearance,<br> but we all have our preferences and those are not a choice we made.\n\n### It\u2019s also about looks\n\nWe all like challenge,<br> but this is not exactly what dating and relationships are based on. I\u2019ve heard some people say physical appearance is not important at all in a relationship,<br> and it almost made me cry.\n\nSo that means they\u2019d be fine going out with someone they don\u2019t really find attractive,<br> and I honestly don\u2019t get how\u2019s that even possible. Desire is indeed caused by the brain,<br> but it is triggered by the senses; sight is one of them. Of course,<br> it is possible to have a relationship with someone you don\u2019t believe is the prettiest physically. Let\u2019s get real : nobody is perfect nor is anyone perfect for someone else because there is always someone better. That doesn\u2019t mean a couple cannot be happy,<br> not at all. Moving on.\n\nWhat if you are simply not attractive to your friend? It\u2019s not their fault for having a type. It\u2019s also not your fault for not being that type.\n\n### So whose fault is it?\n\nMaybe Chewbacca's,<br> the universe's itself,<br> Donald Trump's; I don\u2019t know. How easy is it to blame someone or something. Yeah,<br> some people are statistically more attractive than others. Yeah,<br> some gals have the hots for a type that never shows the slight hint of reciprocity. Some like curves,<br> some like nerds,<br> some like money,<br> some like shy humans,<br> some like emos.\n\nYou\u2019re not in the bunch? Too bad. But don\u2019t hate on your crush because he,<br> she,<br> ze,<br> it likes 300lbs guys,<br> girl,<br> guys and girls,<br> girafes and you can\u2019t gain weight even after eating 19 poutines and a galon of iced tea.\n\nAlways remember you\u2019ve probably friendzoned more people than you think. Probably because you\u2019re awesome or whatever.\n\nHappy ranting.",<br>"json_metadata":" \"tags\":[\"relationship\",<br>\"friendzone\",<br>\"goodguys\",<br>\"excuse\",<br>\"egocentricity\" " | | vote | "voter":"mtlryk",
"author":"mtlryk",
"permlink":"the-friendzone-is-a-lousy-excuse-for-sucking-at-relationships",
"weight":10000 |
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