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      "body": "<html>\n<p>\tFor about two months I have remained silent on this topic. To express an opinion is one thing, but to do so in an articulate manner is quite another. A general sentiment is grasped easily enough. Through the process of reflection and by engaging in a dialectic one can ascertain with hopes of communicating a deeper meaning of a situation. In other words I like to think about things before I say them. Changing peoples minds isn't necessarily the goal. The goal is to be understood.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tI am an American white male and have been so for 34 years. In my adolescence I rebelled against this on account of both history and the contemporary society of which I found myself. The most heinous atrocities were all committed by the white man. I will give America a few points for opposing the Nazi's in WWII. However, on the whole there has not been a great source of pride which can be derived from our past. As for the continuation of racism in our culture, it can be generalized as ignorance. The belief that you can know in advance things about an individual predicated upon a stereotype according to their race, color, creed, sexual orientation, etc... is blatantly false. This ignorance can be found in individuals of all mental capacities from those dumber than a bag of rocks on up to those whom are as sharp as a tack. This disposition is most dangerous among the intelligentsia due to their influence and ability to disseminate hatred.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tThe new Presidential administration has caused me a significant amount of concern. My particular demographic should be the least concerned of all. It is pretty obvious that white guys are the least concerned group when it comes to the new White House. &nbsp;No one has proposed taking any of my/our rights away, so what do I/we have to worry about? That silence, that lack of discourse is a prime example of our white (male) privilege. A sentiment that was expressed from this point of view is that we ought to \"wait and see what happens\". Another similar thought from the same point of view is disdain towards the expression of outrage by those whom will be negatively effected by the new administration. Neither of those positions ought to be justified.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tThere is a sense of urgency among those who stand to be disenfranchised by proposed policies, as there should be. Roughly all citizens who are not a white male stand something to lose. In particular I am referring to women's reproductive rights and immigration. In a broader sense, the new administration has brought along with it a nod towards racism and prejudice against anything that is not white, christian or heterosexual. The institutionalization of discrimination is unacceptable. It is completely understandable that these people should not only be concerned but legitimately upset at this turn of events.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tSo how does this relate to me? What do I personally stand to lose? The direct impact is rather limited. The legality of abortion could impact me granted the fact that I am biologically capable of procreating. Beyond that things get a bit more obtuse. Although I am one of the most selfish people you will ever meet, I have a genuine concern for the well being of my friends and fellow citizens. I derive no satisfaction from the denigration of others.</p>\n<p>\t I can hear the criticism about the use of the word \"citizen\". \"It's the illegal immigrants that we want to get rid of.\" I suppose that is a valid argument if you want to ignore the valuable contribution that is made to the economy by illegal immigrants by way of performing jobs that legal citizens do not want to do in the first place let alone at a wage that cannot be matched legally and is to the benefit of both the employer as well as the migrant worker. I am specifically referencing how last year several states reported millions of dollars of lost revenue due to stricter immigration laws which resulted in in vacant harvesting jobs and left the produce in the field to rot. Legal citizens proved either unskilled at the position and unwilling to perform such a task for the amount of compensation offered. Additionally, placing undue barriers to obtaining citizenship is at least equally if not more of a concern.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tWhile on the topic of immigration, let me briefly talk about this proposed wall. This is one of the most profoundly idiotic ideas I have ever heard. The end. To discuss it any further will give it more credence than it deserves.</p>\n<p>\tTo wrap up my thoughts on immigration, please consider this... Are you the descendant of immigrants? I am. One of my grandparents and most of my great grandparents faced the hardships of leaving their countries for America in search of opportunity, freedom and prosperity. Has the time come where we are to turn our backs one of the few redeeming moments in our history? &nbsp;It was a brutal moment when people flooded into America and were put to work as human fodder for the industrial machine the produced the country in which we now find ourselves living. Is it time to take down the plaque which bears \"The New Colossus\"? That is the poem on the Statue of Liberty. You know the one... \"Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, ...\" We may as well take the whole damn statue down while we are at it.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tEcological concerns are also arising. We seem to be at a pivotal point in our attempts to maintain a global climate and ecology that we have grown accustomed to. It is a folly to turn our national backs on growing evidence that the planet we are living on and the species which inhabit it are in danger. What we do now will have an impact on the world for centuries to come. In some case irreparable damage has already occurred. Why don't we take the steps necessary to limit or eliminate harm moving forward?</p>\n<p>\tMy most significant concern lies with freedom and liberty. I don't have any grudge against the constitution. I particularly like the 1st and 9th amendments. The whole bill of rights is pretty rad. Also, let us not forget about the amendments which granted suffrage to blacks, women and 18 year olds. I'm beginning to get the impression that the new Presidential administration does not take this document seriously and intends to violate it when ever it sees fit. That makes me a sad panda. To strip anyone of rights or to oppress any individual begins a process. This process if granted the ability to operate will strip all rights that it potentially can in order to dominate, assert control and eliminate opposition. But what fear does the heterosexual white male have? Supposing I favored the status quo, I wouldn't have much to worry about. However I am a free thinker. I will not spew blind and mindless nationalism. My freedom to think, to challenge, to express dissent becomes jeopardized as a result. I will no longer to have a voice to speak for those whom are less fortunate than myself. By less fortunate, I mean those not born an American heterosexual white male (how dare they be born otherwise? The nerve of some people.)</p>\n<p>\tFor the record, I voted for Gary Johnson. The Libertarian ideal is to limit or remove the role of government in society. He favored some of the cuts to public funding that people are currently upset about. This position was not accompanied with bigotry. It is in the name of the individual being sovereign unto themselves. Society should learn to start doing some things for itself instead of relying on the government to provide particular services.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tDo I think we as a nation would have been better off had Hillary won the election? That is a complicated question. I am not a political scientist. I find most political positions, both left and right, to be rather gut wrenching. History isn't my forte either. From what I gather, all the Presidential administrations throughout history have shared one thing in common, to favor the affluent. So whether you are putting red or blue lipstick on that pig, it is still a pig. Regardless of who is President, there are going to be some seriously shady deals going down. The bright side I see in our current situation is that our new President will receive unprecedented levels of scrutiny. I have my sincerest hopes that this scrutiny can also be coupled with accountability. For example, it would do us a great service if President Trump were to be held accountable for the clear and direct conflicts of interest that are posed by his corporate assets in relation to his new political office.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tI am not a radical nor am I a revolutionary. I do possess a certain degree of patriotism. I love where I come from. The Mon Valley was and is a gritty place to grow up. It has shaped who I am. Many people I know have incorporated a hard nosed work ethic that I believe to be characteristic of the region. Our speech, our geography, our cuisine all contribute to our culture. I don't know a whole lot about being American, because I've only lived in one county my whole life. I've traveled but it's not the same. A little taste of other regions culture doesn't make me shit red, white and blue.</p>\n<p>\tGoing into the election I was hoping Donald Trump would lose. I took as a consolation prize, that if he did win, at least I would get to watch the world burn. It is scarier than I though it would be. These next few years are going to be quite a test for my optimistic outlook.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tWhat am I going to do about this new and threatening administration? Not much is going to change for me, as I have previously mentioned my privileged status of not being much of a target for new policy. I have and will continue to contribute money to the ACLU. When it comes to battling the government some educated lawyers will most likely be our best defense. This essay is about the closest I come to protesting. I support protest, even the violent ones. However when the violence and destruction enters into the picture the protesters relinquish the protection offered by the first amendment. The value I see in the violence and destruction is the expression of the level of dissatisfaction involved.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\t For as much as we discuss government or complain about it, there is something that co-exists with it which I find far more value in and love for. That is society. Each individual owes gratitude towards society for every aspect of their life. There has been a collective effort going on for the last few millennia. History has taken note of the individuals who have made the greatest contributions. There is not a single day in your life that was not touched by and enhanced by some innovator from the past. I rest my faith in society to overcome the obstacles that lie ahead. Whether it be an oppressive government, climate change, overpopulation, natural catastrophe, unnatural catastrophe, etc... there will always be individuals willing to rise to the challenge and struggle onward toward their dying breath.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\t</p>\n</html>",
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      "body": "Makes you wonder if it's because everyone can relate to unpleasantness whereas not everyone can relate to pleasure. Hmm. Idk",
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      "body": "Thank you for reading this piece. For the record, I am an optimist. I had read somewhere that discussing unpleasantness makes for better writing. I felt that to be the best fit for this topic.",
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      "body": "I enjoyed your article so very much. People struggle, we as humans struggle for some reason we do. We search for the source and look for the cause and in all of time we have not found the cause of our own weakness, our calamity if you will. Life is beautiful. Have a wonderful day.",
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      "body": "<html>\n<p><img src=\"https://photos.google.com/photo/AF1QipO1hBh1qzTUDNTs4CbeiQP7O9LX42fbtPmU0Cp-\"/>\tI recently celebrated two years of sobriety. I use the term \"celebrate\" loosely. I don't know the exact date when I quit. Sentimentality isn't my strong suit. Additionally, it's not like I did anything out of my routine to mark the occasion, lest you count this essay. It took me a considerable period of time to decide how to approach this topic. The traditional narrative includes nothing but the positive elements. There isn't much of a challenge involved in listing all the gains related to sobriety. To do so expresses the tendency to whitewash the appearance of your life. You know what I mean... how some people show you all the great things they have and pretend that their life is perfect. My life is not perfect.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tThis essay is about some of the difficult and unpleasant elements of sobriety. One of the most significant elements is persona and self image. I had abused drugs and alcohol for such a long period of time that it became part of my identity. Drinking does have a few benefits. Alcohol is undoubtedly a social lubricant. Getting tuned up with a person can be the foundation of a relationship with that person. When you quit using, when you take that bond away, you are faced with the reality of the situation. What DO I have in common with this person? Are they a friend? Are they an acquaintance? Do we share any common interests beyond getting messed up with them? I am fortunate in that regard. I do have plenty of friends with whom I share common interest. The removal of drugs and alcohol (even if just one sided) has serious implications in the alteration of the dynamics of the relationship, for better or for worse. Any change has its degrees of difficulty, but in my experience it has generally been for the better.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tFortunately for me I was not a one dimensional person to begin with. Things I enjoy today are the same things I enjoyed back when I was using. Reading, lifting weights, cooking, playing drums and video games were all part of my life before. Similarly, I am a little disappointed about losing the way alcohol facilitated my writing. It did not make me a better writer. Alcohol reduces inhibitions. That is the property that makes it function as a social lubricant. The translation of this property as it relates to writing comes in the ability to put thoughts down without concern of their content or quality. I hate the term, writers block. Currently I haven't been writing nearly as much as I would like to. Plain laziness is one source of my lack of productivity. The other predominant obstacle is expectation. I expect what I write to be great. If I don't have a good idea and the most original and articulate way to express it, then I feel as if it is a waste of my time (whether I hold that feeling consciously or unconsciously). If it ain't gonna be superior, why bother? That isn't how it works. You have to wade through a bunch of garbage and failure to achieve success.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\t Another related circumstance that I am still wrestling with is when I was still on a mission to get obliterated as often as possible I had a different approach to life. I lived like there was no tomorrow. In that respect I feel as if I was milking as much enjoyment and experience in general from each day. While there is some truth to that, there is a much darker side that comes along with it. It was motivated by by despair. For a long time I did not care to nor expect to see another day. For me, the negative elements of my life and this world I live in outweighed the positive elements. Since that time I have turned the corner. I put in the time and effort to resolve the internal conflicts that were at the root of my depression. Essentially it boiled down to faults in perception. Simply put, I shifted the focus of my attention away from all the negative aspects of existence and instead developed a sense of gratitude for all the wonderful conditions and opportunities that I have available to me. That is much easier said than done. It took years of hard work and dedication to achieve that. Here's a tip if you are looking to accomplish this for yourself. Don't blame other people or the world in general for any problems you have. Don't blame yourself either. Figure out a solution and work to achieve it. It is also essential to not undertake problems of the world. Don't assume any unrealistic burdens. For example, I can not abolish poverty and world hunger. I don't let it bother me. It's not my problem. This disposition doesn't prohibit me from donating to a food drive. I'm not losing sleep over the people who go to bed hungry or without a roof over their head.</p>\n<p>\tConversely, in my advancing age I find myself becoming more conservative. I have decided to embrace this change. Years of mindless rebellion hasn't produced much more than several scars, physically speaking and otherwise. They say that youth is wasted on the young. That isn't how I see it. Going full tilt and with reckless abandon is perfectly suitable for when we can physically cope with the consequences. I don't heal like I used to. It's time to stop destroying myself. My allusion to being conservative is not meant to express a stagnation of thought. I am still learning and I will remain open minded. What I mean is that I am starting to see trends and consequences more clearly based on the process of trial and error. I can now lean towards behaviors that have been demonstrated productive results.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tI like to tuck the most embarrassing and offensive ideas at the end of my essays. I assume that most people won't read this far. I have been avoiding going to shows and most other social activities. I don't like being around people who are slopped up. I find them annoying. I have absolutely nothing against drinking in moderation. If I were capable of doing so, I would. Whether it be my old behavior patterns waiting to be fallen back into or if it may be some sort of genetic predisposition, I am incapable of sustaining the practice of moderation for more than a week or two. The cause is irrelevant. All or nothing for this guy. My point is, being in room full of people drinking to excess is not my idea of a good time. Could it be the temptation? I like to pretend that desire isn't a factor. I don't like to admit that drinking does cross my mind. It is a small voice that I am strong enough to crush at every appearance. It is a voice none the less. I am cautious and I avoid engendering or encouraging that voice. On the flip side of the coin, there is the angle of how I may be perceived. I spend the minimum about of time on this topic. I have always crafted my behavior around not giving a fuck about what people think of me. However to totally disregard this consideration would be foolish. It needs to hold as much weight as far as it is to my own benefit. I am okay with being disliked. I used to wear a vest that had the words, \"RATHER BE HATED THAN IGNORED\" very large on the back. I would not be okay with being an outcast or an exile. As much as I rebel against the standard definition of what it is to be human, I have universal ties to nearly every person, relatively speaking. We are social creatures. I can function with a low amount of social interaction. That does not exclude the fact that I require socializing as much as any sane person would. I'm willing to bet that the majority of the constituents of our Pittsburgh music community were at one point in their lives exiled, shunned, picked on, outcast, etc... from some group or another. Us \"punks\" were different. The herd felt threatened by these differences and rejected us. Which brings up another point... there is a feeling of discomfort the comes along with being a person not drinking in a room full of people who are indulging. Implicit in my abstinence is the statement that there is something wrong with drinking. Whether consciously or not the herd rejects that statement. I hold liberty as one of the highest concepts. I can do whatever I want so long as it has no negative consequences upon others. Each other person has this right. I respect another person's right to get tanked. Please don't spill your beer on my shoes or worse yet, my head. Please don't smash your car into mine when we are driving home. To me, those actions are violating the conditions of liberty. In any case I like to limit my exposure to situations that I find myself uncomfortable in (even if it is only slightly uncomfortable).&nbsp;</p>\n<p>\tI saved the best for last. I don't believe in the traditional concepts of free will OR determinism. I believe reality is more complicated that our simpleminded dualities. I doubt our language has the capacity to articulate what really goes on in our universe. What I'm getting at is that I do not feel as if I have a choice in my sobriety. I would not be able to afford to live if I was still drinking and using drugs. I have no resentment for this circumstance in which I find myself. I know with the same degree of certainty that I know anything, that I am best off in my sobriety. I don't like to think of the alternatives. I could be homeless, incarcerated or dead, among other terrible situations. I think I'll take sobriety over those options.&nbsp;</p>\n<p>P.S. The purpose of this essay was not to receive a pat on the back for my \"accomplishment\" of having two years under my belt. I could drop into in an AA meeting for that kind of pat on the back from people who are deeply involved in that type of struggle. The purpose was to give myself an opportunity to me introspective and to share that introspection with others. I hope this makes at least one person think about something that will contribute value to their existence.&nbsp;</p>\n</html>",
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